What Now?
by semazani
Summary: What happens when two members of the team are thrust together for reasons neither one expected? Can a man with no past help the one woman he least expected to need him and ensure her future is safe? I am unsure how this story will progress, so I look forward to feedback about whether there is room for more!
1. Chapter 1

It was suppose to be a fun evening with some college friends. They had been in town for various reasons, but decided to have a mini-reunion. She had not been out for an evening in so long she appeared almost giddy when leaving work. The thought of dressing up for a night out and enjoying the company of some old friends was as close to normal as her life had been since joining the Office of Special Projects. Make no mistake she loved her job and could never imagine doing anything else, but it took so much time and energy that most nights she just wanted a hot bath and warm bed. The idea of going out on the town had not really ever landed on her radar with everything else going on in her world. It was going to be a chance to break out of her shell and just be someone else for awhile. She decided it would be fun to step out of her comfort zone a bit and see what living a little more carelessly would be like – even if it was just for one night. Maybe she had been involved in one too many operations that she thought it would be a fun change of pace to pretend to be someone else for a night.

When her old roommates contacted her initially to tell her they were in town, it took a bit of convincing to get her on board with the idea meeting anywhere. She finally relented when they promised a night to remember coupled with the added bonus of being able to reconnect. So much time was spent working over the last couple weeks that she decided it would be good to get out and have some fun. She left her house that night wearing clothes that most of her friends, as well as co-workers, would have had to take a second look at her just to verify her identity. The top was a powder blue color with just a hint of shimmer and showed off more skin than anyone had ever seen her reveal. It was cut right above her breasts and gathered just right running loosely along her chest leaving her arms completely exposed.

As she turned around in the mirror to inspect the newly purchased item of clothing, she admired the open back that had just enough fabric criss-crossed to keep it in place. In keeping with this new look, she had also purchased a skirt that landed somewhere between her knees and mid-thigh hugging the curves she typically kept hidden from the world. She finished her new creation off with a pair of black boots that went halfway up her calf. She took one last glance in the mirror, second guessing the sexy factor, only to have to her thoughts interrupted by the ringing of her front door bell.

She walked towards the door, checking to make sure it was indeed her friends, before opening the door to an onslaught of whistles and comments from old friends. They were completely shocked, as she is sure most who knew her would be, to see this new version of someone they had not seen in years. Little did they know that this was the first time she had ever worn anything this revealing before and was not secretly unsure she could will herself out the door without changing first. Her thoughts were once again interrupted as one friend grabbed her small purse while another pushed her through the front door. Shaking her head slightly, she determined changing was no longer an option. They arrived at the small pub in no time and quickly found a table to sit around. The music and atmosphere was amazing making her wonder how she had never discovered this little pub before now. The ambiance was calm and the people seemed friendly. No one seemed to have a care in the world and she decided to give this new persona completely immersing herself in with the natural flow of her surroundings.

They talked, laughed, and danced for a good hour when she was approached by a man who offered to buy her a drink. She politely refused and turned to talk to her friends once again. The man walked away from the table looking a bit disconcerted, but she quickly dismissed the entire event while focusing on yet another trip down memory lane. After some more laughter and recollections of their time on campus, she excused herself to see about locating a bathroom. She walked past the bar and was turning to go down the short hallway leading to the bathroom, when she felt a hand on her arm. She turned around to see the same man standing directly in front of her smiling. After introducing himself, he asked her if she wanted to dance. Deciding to throw out all her misgivings and truly embrace this second skin she chose for the night, she gave him a small nod of her head and followed him toward the middle of the pub. They danced for a short time and all seemed to be going well, especially if she took into account the encouraging waves and nods her friends were sending her way as they found us on the dance floor.

As the music slowed she excused herself as she had no interest in a more intimate dance with a man she had just met. Honestly he seemed like a perfectly nice person, but she just was not interested in encouraging any kind of contact that may seem like an invitation she was not willing to give out. She started to walk away, while he followed her toward the small hallway leading to the bathroom. She felt his hand along her arm rubbing it softly prompting her to turn around. He had been standing much closer than she had thought and she ran directly into his chest. He was a well built man, every bit as tall as Sam and appeared to be just about as fit as him as well. He laughed softly at my shock and leaned into my body closing distance that I was not even aware existed. I attempted to push him away, but found his once soft rubbing of my arm turned into a tight grip that bordered on painful. In what seemed to be a dream, she feels his hands seem to a life of their own as they move up and down her body in what could only be described as highly disturbing. Gone was the sweet smile he had offered when he first approached for the dance. He was unrelenting and no matter how many times she told him no it became increasingly evident he had no intention of conceding to her requests.

She began to panic slightly as he increased the pressure on her arm and she was certain he was leaving a handprint that would be there for some time to come. His other hand was unrelenting as he attempted to find access to the places she had never allowed anyone to explore. His mouth was on her neck and he was roughly kissing what areas he could access while she attempted to jerk from his hold. She cursed the music that had once been a welcome part of the evening because it allowed the perfect cover for anyone she tried to get help from. As he ran his hand along her leg and started moving under her skirt, she was immediately catapulted into fight or flight mode and started struggling for all she was worth. As luck would have it at that very moment someone approached him tapping him on shoulder, giving her an opening to remove herself from his restraint and move out of the pub.

"Training my ass," she quietly cursed to herself as she opened the front door of her house. She was suddenly very thankful they had picked a place right around the corner. How the hell is training suppose to fix the size difference or the strength difference she thought to no one in particular. She shuddered briefly as she relived the feel of his hands all over her skin grabbing her ways that made her wish she had never agreed to leave the house. This is why she should just stick to work and home. It eliminates the possibility of what happened to her tonight. It started innocent enough alright, but it quickly spiraled out of control. No amount of training could have prevented his hands from moving wherever they wanted to be at that given moment. It was just by some small miracle some random person walked by and interrupted his assault against her skin. In just the split second of him being distracted, she managed to separate herself from his loosened grip silently thanking the heavens above for having such a short stature that allowing her to escape unnoticed by him. She mentally noted that maybe the hand to hand combat sessions everyone keeps saying she should attend would be a good idea. Hell at this point, maybe it would have given her the skills to have prevented this evening from happening at all.

In the ten minutes it took her to escape the pub and make it to her house, she was struck with a sudden wave of dizziness seemingly hitting from out of nowhere. She briefly thought she was going to throw up as she stumbled ever so slightly into the door frame. The wave passed quickly giving way to an inability to focus her eyes on anything other than a spinning room. It was such a sudden onset that she quickly dismissed the recurring cinema playing in her head of his hands all over her body as the culprit. In a sudden jolt of fear, she managed to lock the door and start toward the couch in an attempt to lie down before she could no longer stand. She realized in that moment that the man must have somehow given her something that would render her completely unable to stop any assault that was on the horizon. In the few seconds she was able to replay that night, she could not remember a time he could have given her any such drugs. She had not drank anything more than water the entire evening knowing all too well the dangers of taking drinks from random people in pubs. She had insisted on getting all her drinks from the bartender herself which caused quite a reaction from her friends who thought she was being overly cautious. As she moved toward the living room, the room spun and she was no longer in control of her legs. In a brief flash of pain, she felt herself fall to the ground striking a hard object during her decent.

The first thing she remembered when she woke up was the almost blinding pain her head as she opened her eyes. For the love of god, she didn't even drink last night so why the hell did her head feel like it was going to explode. As her eyes came into focus, she realized she was lying on her living room floor with the overturned coffee table just a few feet away. She moved to sit up and the second flash of pain hit her so suddenly it made her stomach lurch. As she hissed in pain her eyes searching for the source, her arm came into focus. It was badly bruised, swollen from just above her wrist to almost her elbow and had an angry red cut that was surrounded by dried blood. She lay back on the ground slowly and fought to recall what the hell had happened. It seemed the more she struggled to remember the less she could make sense of her current surroundings. She felt like she had been hit by a bus and left to deal with the aftermath. After a few minutes of trying to calm her head and get used to the pain, she decided she really needed to pull herself together enough to make it to the bathroom. Slowly she sat up as her body adjusted to the new wave of dizziness threatening to send her stomach into another tailspin.

She made her way slowly to the bathroom. By the time she reached her destination, she realized it was a damn good thing her house was relatively small. Her intent had been to retrieve some sort of pain reliever from her medicine cabinet, but the trip quickly changed into a battle to find the toilet. The dizziness never relented and its assault on her equilibrium caused waves of nausea which threatened spill over. She realized just in time that there was no stopping the contents of her stomach from spilling unceremoniously into the toilet. She felt her body slide to the ground as she tried to regain control of her senses. After sitting there for a couple minutes, she realized that the act of puking had actually made her feel a slight bit more human. In a careful and methodical manner, she lifted herself up to the medicine cabinet. As she looked at her reflection in the mirror, she saw a slow motion flash of images that matched those she often searched through during the course of her workday. They seemed like still shots telling the story of a night that she could not quite remember. Images of her sitting at the table with friends laughing….dancing on the floor with a man she does not recognize…..excusing herself to avoid a slow dance…..hands flying all over her body as she stands flush against what appears to be a human wall…..interruption and flight….unlocking her door….then….today.

"What the hell happened last night," she muttered out loud to the reflection in the mirror. She felt like she had spent the whole night drinking heavily and was feeling the effects of a really bad hangover. The problem was she never drank any alcohol. Ever. Even under her new persona she would not have drank any alcohol. Too many possible endings that she was unwilling to allow herself even the chance. In that moment, she reached into the cabinet and withdrew a bottle of medication that would hopefully calm the storm brewing in her head. She was grateful it was the weekend and their caseload was calm. It had been a really tough few weeks with not much free time for anyone to just be at home. Upon closing the cabinet door, she once again caught her reflection and was shocked to realize her arm was bruised quite badly in the shape in a handprint. She closed her eyes, reviewing the film reel that had played out moments before in her bathroom mirror, and gasped as she slowly started to remember the events. The previous night was supposed to have been a night to remember, but that was not at all what she had pictured when setting foot out the door. The assault that had happened and the realization that she was lucky and unlucky all in one moment caused her stomach to lurch once again.

As the wave of nausea hit her once again, she heard a loud banging on her front door. She jumped from the sound and quickly moved to go down the hallway towards the door. In that same moment, she heard the voice of the man from last night yelling loudly for her to open the door. Panic immediately set in and she struggled to slow her mind down enough to allow her to think clearly. She knew it was just a matter of time before the door would be broken through and she was more terrified than she has ever been in her life. In a quick movement, finally regaining some sense of understanding of what exactly the next few minutes meant to her safety, she grabbed her cell phone from the small purse on the living room floor and made her way to the bedroom while dialing an all too familiar number. Now to those who were not aware what she knew her next movements needed to be in order to ensure her safety, the bedroom seemed like the last place she should have retreated. Making her way to the nightstand that was right beside her bed, she opened the drawer at about the same time she heard the wood break along her doorframe.

She quickly found a corner of her room that gave her a clear view of the door that she knew the man would eventually make his way through. He was yelling the most obscene combination of words she had ever heard being directed at her. She was completely at a loss as to why she was being targeted by this man and just wished that she could go back to yesterday removing the whole night from the equation. The logical part of her knew the odds of this being a random act where just as high as her being targeted. No one knew what she really did and where she really worked, so the likelihood of this being intentional was not high. Her thoughts were disrupted by the smashing of various items as the man made his way through her house. In the same vein that made her thank her lucky stars she had a small house only moments ago, it struck her how that is now going to be to her disadvantage. It would not take long for him to make his way to her bedroom and she knew she only had a few more seconds to steel herself for the events to come next. She silently cursed never having got closer the few neighbors who lived her relatively new development. When she picked this house, it seemed better to just try to stay distant from those who had moved into the neighborhood.

The voice was right outside her door before she could comprehend and she knew that he was searching the bedroom down the hall in an attempt to locate her. Honestly, the question that kept repeating in her head was how the hell he found where she lived. She knew she was followed and, if by chance he had, these events would have occurred last night and not this morning. Silently, she hoped that maybe he would give up and assume she was not home at all. She realized that was highly unlikely, but it was a nice idea. While he was making his way down the hallway, she was quickly becoming aware of what she would need to do next. She was trained for this kind of confrontation and she knew the next steps in her training. Of course, that did not really work out well at the pub and she realized that no matter how much technical training she had obtained, it meant nothing in the heat of the moment. She could go through the steps of what needed to happen and in what order, but, in this exact moment, she just didn't know if she could follow through. In a matter of seconds, he was through the door coming directly at her in such a rage that she momentarily forgot she was holding her service weapon in her hand. In that moment instinct kicked in and effectively shut down the manual she kept reviewing in her mind. She raised her weapon, heard her own voice sound much stronger than it should, yell "Federal Agent!" In the same moment she heard that voice, the world seemed to stop as she felt her body slide down the wall.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Notes**

**First, thank you so much for the reviews! I have to say this chapter was more difficult than the first….apparently digging into Callen's thoughts were easier in my head than actually on paper. The chapter is a touch shorter, but it seemed an appropriate place to end it.**

**Second, I am new to posting on this site and am still trying to find my bearings. I would love to respond to the reviews, but have no idea how to go about that! I will say that one of the reviews changed the course of this endeavor and took it a direction I hadn't really considered….that should prove interesting on both my part and yours!**

**Third, I have noticed disclaimers and such on other stories so I assume they are needed. **

**These characters are not mine; I am only borrowing them for the purpose of this story.**

**Finally, I hope you enjoy!**

As he was sitting back against his chair, he marveled at how easily they all seemed to laugh. It was something he was learning more and more over the years, but he still just didn't quite understand how they had been able to just let go that freely. There was always a reason to not trust people and he was used to standing alone. These people had slowly crept into his life and he honestly couldn't remember when they became such an integral part of his world. How did it seem they had always just been with him when they clearly had not been there?

He watched the faces of his team and was silently thankful for all they had done; even though he doubted they even knew to what extent they saved him every day. Sure, there were the obvious moments when bullets or fists were flying, but it was the not so obvious ones that he was especially grateful for. The moments much like these when he could just watch them together laughing and joking freely.

He was happy to hear they were planning a night of unwinding, whether together or separately, and he was listening intently to what they were sharing with each other. After a short time had passed, he found he had not been surprised by any of their revelations. A couple of his team asked him to join them that night, but he declined because he just wanted to be alone; to take some time and just breathe without the threat of the next case right around the corner.

He found himself walking through the quiet halls of headquarters hours after everyone had left and figured he should really go home. The idea of home was still such a foreign concept to the man who never stayed in one place. It occurred to him that the idea of settling down in one place was never a decision that he made, it just happened. He took one last look around before he collected his belongings and walked to his car.

As he sat in the driver's seat, his thoughts drifted once again to his team and he smiled softly at the recollection of one particular member's excitement as they left that night. He overheard her talking amongst everyone about an evening out with some friends from college. It was a nice change to see that old spark back in her spirit especially with all the long hours they had put in lately. She seemed more tired than usual. He shook his head laughing about the level of animation that was so inherently her and started driving towards his home.

His thoughts drifted to her once more as he drove home and was quick reign in the images before they had the potential to stray too far off the beaten path. He had been considering asking the newest member of the team to join him for dinner, but always caught himself before he could follow through. She was such a breath of life and her exuberance caught his attention on more than one occasion and he was intrigued by her so much more than he cared to admit to anyone. He reminded himself of all the reasons it wasn't a good idea to be involved with anyone at this point in his life.

Pulling up to his house he felt as if he had driven the whole way on auto pilot. He blamed his sleep deprivation, but he secretly knew that wasn't the real reason for his mind drifting. As he walked into his home, he determined that he really should invest in some sort of furniture. He just never really imagined putting roots down anywhere and the thought still spooked him on some level.

Walking silently throughout his home, he was greeted with just how tired he really was. It dawned on him that he had earned the right to sleep after all the cases of late. He found himself lying in that old familiar spot to get some shut-eye. The last image he remembered before he succumbed to the exhaustion was her face as she waved goodnight to the team. Before he really had time to think past that snapshot in his mind, he drifted into what would prove to be a really good sleep for the man who slept so inconsistently.

He really didn't remember waking up, just that he was awake. It seemed more than not lately he would wake with a startle; whether from a ringing phone or bad dream, so this had been a welcome change of pace. "Maybe it will be a good day after all," he said quietly to himself. He was still for a moment as his eyes adjusted to the light coming from the windows and it occurred to him that it had been dark when he got home, yet it now appeared to be morning. Checking the time on his watch, he shocked to see it was indeed early morning.

It seemed he actually slept for the entire night; a rare occurrence indeed. So rare in fact, he isn't sure the last time it happened short of being rendered unconscious for reasons out of his control. He sat up slowly and shook his head at the sheer ridiculousness of his battle with sleep. It was a positive change of pace to actually feel rested and he was silently thankful for the gift.

He opted to take a shower before deciding what would lie ahead for him today. As he moved through his house, he practiced one of his many languages. His team all had different things that made them unique from each other, his was these review sessions he frequently put himself through. He made himself some tea and sipped it carefully as he pondered the rest of the day.

The fact that he had absolutely no idea how to spend a free day was almost sad. He had contemplated many different ideas, but not one seemed like a viable option. It became increasingly apparent that he would not come up with anything by just hanging around the house, so he grabbed his jacket and headed out the door to see where he landed. Maybe by just getting in his car, he would come up with some ideas.

He finished breakfast at a local diner and was walking towards his car after finally deciding on a nice day of exploring. It dawned on him that he really wasn't all that familiar with his surrounding area; unless one counted the amount of knowledge he held that allowed him to keep himself protected. He decided it would be better to get to know the place on a more intimate level and really try to immerse himself in the culture around him.

It turned out his phone had other ideas for him as the ringtone alerted him that one of his team was calling him. "Really!" he said while throwing his hands up in pure exasperation. It was as if he was destined to never have a day of peace. In that moment, he briefly thought of how much delight he would garner by accidently leaving this third appendage in his pocket and pretending he forgot it at home. Of course, he was all too aware that option would never actually exist in his world.

Reaching into his jeans pocket, he retrieved the offending device and looked at the screen to see which of his team was calling. Upon seeing her name appear on his phone, he was immediately transported to the night before and how happy she looked leaving the office. He shook away the image and accepted the call before it went to voicemail. He hoped it wasn't a case that needed attending to, but figured that would be the only reason since she never called to just talk.

He was immediately struck to his core when he heard what was on the other line. Never in a million years could he have adequately prepared for how he would react in this situation, which is rather impressive seeing as how he lived his life prepared for any scenario or having the necessary reaction for anything thrown his way. The flashes of everything that could be happening were so vivid it was as if he were in a movie theater watching a horror flick.

As he put the phone to his ear and started to respond, he was greeted with the sound of a man's voice. He could tell it was in the background which made it difficult to understand all that was being yelled. He stood frozen in front of the diner as he heard a barrage of profanity that he would never have imagined her near. He felt a rush of pure fear go through his body once again as he processed the gravity of the situation.

He called her name into the phone, but received no response for his effort leading him to believe she didn't actually have the phone on her person any longer. Before he could register what to do next, his body had moved into autopilot launching him off the sidewalk toward his car. He tried saying her name again and was greeted with a louder version of this man's voice indicating that he was getting closer to wherever the phone at been placed.

He threw the car into drive and rushed toward her home praying to whatever god may be around to let him get there in time. Although he had questioned his decision to look up the addresses of his team without their permission, he was now very thankful he went through their personnel files. He prided himself on his privacy and knew he would unimpressed, make that downright pissed, if any of his team searched his file for information he had not handed them freely.

He was suddenly very thankful that this newest member of his team lived just a short distance from where he was. As he sped through the lights leading to her home, he kept the phone on speaker in the seat next to him trying in vain to get her to answer him. In an act of pure desperation, he called to her that he was on his way and prayed she could at least hear him; even if she was unable to respond.

It was becoming increasingly more apparent to him that she had dialed his number and dropped her phone wherever it landed. This situation was sounding more and more like a life or death scenario that he would have never imagined she would be in. Sure she was an agent, but field work was not her domain and that scared him more than he was willing to think about right then.

Every active agent knows the skills learned in the field are so much different than the classroom setting she went through during her training. Nothing can prepare you for the onslaught of emotions needed to deal with a real threat. In the classroom, you know the threat won't end your life at the end of the moment. What he is hearing over the phone tells him the threat to her life is very real and he feels like time is just moving too slowly. He knows all too well how quickly a scene can turn deadly.

As he rounds the last corner leading to her home, his eyes take in the scene in an attempt to gain some sort of advantage. In that same instant, he hears her voice over the line announce she is a federal agent in such a strong manner that he entertains the idea that she has the situation under control. These thoughts are quickly shattered as her voice is followed quickly by the firing of a gun. He feels himself jump involuntarily in response to the sound of two shots fired in quick succession.

Less than a minute later he skids to a stop in front of her home and quickly gets out of his car. He pockets his cell and removes his weapon from the holster at his back. He quickly approaches the house, completely unaware of what he going to find. He silently curses to himself for not calling the others. As he reaches her small front porch, he sees the door had been kicked in and decides to activate the agent in distress alert. It will bring his team to their location in a matter of minutes and he knows that is the quickest way to get some much needed backup. He reasons that there is an agent in distress, even if it isn't actually him.

In the brief seconds it takes to activate the alert, he hears footsteps rapidly coming towards him and before he can train his weapon on the doorway he feels like he has struck a brick wall. A man, running with an enormous amount of speed, flies out the front door knocking him to the ground in the process. He quickly regains his footing, cursing the pain shooting through his shoulder while moving to stop the man. The force of the impact, which knocked him off his feet, gave the man ample time to speed past him making it highly unlikely he could stop him readily.

He quickly returns to the front door, weapon drawn and ready, and enters the house deciding her safety comes above catching the suspect. He digs deep within himself to stop from reacting out of raw emotion and forces himself to enter the home in the same manner he would for any other search. He knew there was at least one male, but it was possible there were more suspects than he could hear over the phone.

As he passes through the living room, taking mental pictures of the destruction left behind, he quickly determines the room is clear. It took everything in his power not to call her name right then, but he knew, for her sake, he needed the element of surprise. He feels like he is going crazy and questions why he can't just sweep the house like any other. Of course, she is part of the team and he would easily put himself on the line for any of them, but the very fiber of his being aches with an overwhelming fear. This fear is from a place he doesn't even recognize.

Winding through the dining room and kitchen areas, he finds no other suspects and moves swiftly toward the lone hallway in the home. Moving deliberately towards the room that was closer to him, he finds an empty bedroom. He is shocked to see the broken glass on the floor and wonders what exactly happened in the room. It took all of his power to keep his brain from playing all the bad images that were being conjured based on the destruction he is seeing throughout the house.

Taking a deep intake of air, he moves down the hallway pausing briefly at a small bathroom to his left. As he goes toward the only remaining room in the house that has yet to be cleared, he mentally prepares himself for the worst. He has no idea what he is going to find in the room. How would he be able to deal with the guilt if he finds her injured or worse? It pains him to think that he was so close when he heard the gun discharge, but just not close enough to stop whatever had happened.

He has so many unanswered questions and he is truly afraid of what the answers might be. Where is she? Is she alright? What happened to the man whose voice came over the phone so livid that he is certain it would be impossible to attach a happy ending to this morning destruction? How did he get in the house and why was he even there?

One look around the doorway of the room makes him stop dead in his tracks for the briefest of seconds. He recovers quickly and moves into the last room to be cleared. After he completes his search of the adjoining bathroom and closet area, he places his weapon back in the holster while moving towards an image he could have never imagined he would see.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Notes – Nope…still not mine.**

** Reviews and thoughts are more than welcome! I have found this piece has shifted much more than expected. I have been writing a lot of the last couple days and I decided to change an angle or two in the later chapters. It won't cause a delay as I have several chapters completed in rough draft form. Just have to clean them up a bit.**

** Dialogue has been an interesting creature and bringing in the whole team was not at all my original thought. Please critique the interactions and words spoke by the team. I really am trying to make them sound in character as much as I can…just not sure it's working.**

She is in the corner of her bedroom staring straight at him. At least that's how it appeared on first glance. On second look, it occurs to him it appears she is staring straight through him. She is sitting in the corner on floor with her gun trained directly at his chest not making a sound. It's like she is frozen in place.

He slowly approaches her as he holsters his weapon. Upon freeing his hands, he raises them both as a sign of surrender while murmuring "It's me, Nell. It's Callen. You're safe now." One of his first instincts was to remove her weapon from the equation; the second was to make sure she was physically unharmed.

He honestly couldn't be sure if she was even registering his voice at that moment. He slowly moves into a position that would allow him to remove the weapon from her hands. Reaching forward he gently grabs the barrel of her weapon in one hand, while his other urges her fingers to release their hold. "Nell, it's Callen. Let me have the gun," he croons softly while reaching for her weapon. After safely removing her weapon and placing it on the ground near her bed, he moves to make check her body over for any life-threatening injuries.

Shock is a fickle creature. While it can protect your mind from the horrors it just witnessed, it can just as quickly turn inward playing twisted jokes on reality. He did not want her to mistake him for the man who had broken into her home. The man he knew would be the reason she would no longer feel completely safe in her own home for some time to come.

He leans forward while quietly saying her name and announcing his presence once again. Hesitating slightly, he reaches to touch her arm in an attempt to bring her back to reality. He knows one wrong move and she could misread his identity. As he pulls her slowly to her feet, he silently questions how much he should be touching her right then. After all, he has no idea what she had been through leading up to the present moment. He just keeps murmuring quiet words to her over and over hoping some would reach her.

As he gently moves her towards him, he quickly scans her body to determine whether she was injured. He takes mental notes of the obvious injuries he finds. He sees bruising along one arm that is in the shape of a large hand that appears to have gripped her entirely too tightly. Her other arm is swollen and bruised with a cut that is surrounded by dried blood. He feels a wave of anger and relief all at one time. The fact that someone has inflicted pain on Nell makes his blood boil. On the other hand, he is happy to see the wounds appear minor; at least on the surface.

He locks eyes with the young analyst and calls her name one last time. Callen catches a flicker of recognition in the seconds before she collapses into his chest. He hears her gasp at the same time her body falls limp. The force of her falling unexpectedly into his causes him to momentarily loose his equilibrium. He quickly repositions his body so he is holding her against him as he moves their bodies against the wall for support. As he is holding her, he feels her body shudder as she cries softly. If he hadn't been holding her, he is certain he wouldn't have even realized the tears were falling. He takes a breath as he determines there will be plenty of time to determine what really happened. For now, he just wants to make sure she knows she is safe.

As he holds her on the floor of her bedroom, it occurs to him how time seems to have been in slow motion. From the time his phone rang until he reached Nell's house and found her had been such a short time in reality, but seems like it took an eternity to get this point. He feels his anger increasing as her body starts to shake; the shock is pulling her further into the abyss. He pulls her tighter against him and rubs her hair lightly in an attempt to calm her. "Shh, you're alright. I'm here. I won't let anyone hurt you," he whispers.

He looks at the doorway as he hears movement. He puts one hand on his weapon drawing it swiftly in the direction of the doorway, while holding Nell tightly against him with his free hand. Seeing his partner appear in the doorway, he relaxes. Sam re-holsters his own weapon and calls to the rest of the team. "I got him!" The rest of the team appears in the doorway after clearing the rest of the house. Kensi and Deeks walk into the bedroom taking in the scene as Sam moves towards Callen.

Callen slowly stands while lifting Nell was he does. He holds Nell firmly against his body and turns towards Sam. The sheer act of standing was made more difficult as it seemed Nell made no effort to support her own body. "What the hell happened in here, man? We got the agent in distress signal for you, but Eric said this was Nell's address." His partner voices the question everyone, including himself, wants the answer to.

"Nell, I'm gonna go talk to Sam." Callen says while simultaneously shifting her towards Kensi so he could talk to Sam in private. He stops when he feels her body begin to tense. She was shakes her head vigorously while repeating the word no in a voice that increases exponentially in volume the more it is repeated. Sam instinctively reaches forward trying to help Callen calm Nell, but quickly draws back when her reaction intensifies. Nell is now pulling so intensely against Callen it's difficult for him to hold on to her.

Using his own body as shield, he moves effectively blocking her view of Sam and reminds her where lines of reality lie. "It's just Sam. You're safe now, it's gonna be alright," he whispers into her hair. He reaches down cradling her face in his hands and forcing her to look at him. "It's alright, go with Kensi. She will keep you safe." He sees just a hint of recognition, but she makes no attempt to move on her own.

Callen steps into the role of senior agent-in-charge and relays orders to his team. He knows they need to get the investigation going as soon as possible. "Kensi, take Nell to the bathroom in the hall. Make sure she isn't hurt anywhere else that we can't readily see. Try talking to her and see if she is able to tell you anything about what happened." Kensi steps towards Callen and moves Nell into her arms. Callen watches as they walk out of the room noting how much Kensi is supporting her.

"Deeks call Eric and have him send a forensics team to start processing the scene. On my way in the house, I got knocked down by the suspect. Have Eric start searching the street cams in the area. See if we can get anywhere with finding the guy who was here. I honestly can't give you any kind of description other than he is built like a brick wall. We're gonna need a safe house to move Nell to until we get a handle on what we are dealing with." Nodding in affirmation, Deeks lifts his phone out of his pocket to call Eric.

"Sam, we need to figure out what the hell happened here today," Callen catches the anger in his voice making more of an appearance than he would have liked. His partner stands calmly watching while waiting for him to continue. "I got a call from her number about 15 minutes ago and all I heard was yelling in the background. I couldn't get her to respond to me at all. Thinking maybe she called me and then dropped her phone wherever she could. As I pulled onto her street, I heard her identify herself as a federal agent and then the sound of two shots fired. I started toward her front door and the guy knocked me over on his way out. By the time I got back on my feet, he was almost out of sight."

Callen continues his story as Sam moves through the room looking for any clues as what may have happened. "I cleared the front of the house and made my way back here. Nell was sitting in the corner with her back against the wall and her weapon trained straight at my chest. I got her weapon and helped her to her feet. She was already showing signs of shock and as soon as she registered it was me, she collapsed into my arms. We landed on the floor where you found us."

Sam calls Callen over to the wall by her dresser and points out two bullet holes that he found just above pictures of a much happier Nell with friends and family. "Doesn't appear to have any blood," he notes while examining the entrance holes. "It appears she didn't hit him. That's a good and bad thing. Good she doesn't have to deal with having to with shooting someone, but bad cause that means he's still out there somewhere."

As Callen nods to show he agrees with his partner, their thoughts are interrupted by the sound of Deeks' voice. "We got a couple girls out here that say they are friends of Nell's. They all went out together last night and they are freaking out by the scene out there." Callen looks at Sam as they walk silently towards the living room. While passing the bathroom, Callen pauses briefly to check in with Kensi. Sam continues with Deeks nodding slightly to Callen as he passes him.

Looking around the half closed door leading to the bathroom, he caught Kensi's eyes. She shakes her head softly in answer to the question Callen had yet to even pose. He motions for Kensi to join him in the doorway so he can see check in with her. "She hasn't said a word Callen. We need to get her checked out by the medical team sooner rather than later. I don't know what happened to her and she isn't exactly in the position to answer us right now." Kensi speaks softly to lessen the chance of Nell overhearing their conversation.

Callen approaches Nell cautiously and leans down into a squatting position so he is eye level with her. "Kensi is going to take you to the safe house and get you checked out by the doctor there. She will stay with you until we are done here and then I will come over so we can talk." It bothers Callen how much she seems to be looking through everyone rather than at them. The lack of reaction reminds how he misses Nate. He would be perfect for this moment. Frustrated at his own lack of competence, Callen rises quickly and motions for Kensi to come get Nell.

"Hetty has arranged for us to use the safe house closest to OSP, so we can be near her. Obviously our team can't stay with her at all times, but we are going to her main protection detail. Hetty is giving us a bit of latitude because this is Nell we're talking about, but we also need have enough of us on hand investigating to find out what happened. I need you to get her settled in the safe house while Deeks, Sam, and I finish up here. I'll send another agent over there within the next hour so you can meet us back in ops. We can put together what we have all found at that point." Kensi nods indicating she understands and turns back towards Nell. As he leaves the doorway, Callen takes one last look back at Nell and feels his heart pull at the sight of her staring blankly at the wall.

As he rounds the corner leading from the hallway to the living room, he tries to rein in his emotions as tears sting his eyes. He comes up behind Deeks as he finishes up his conversation with the young women who identified themselves as Nell's friends. "Give the agent over there your name and contact information in case we need to verify any more information," he tells them as he points to the front porch area. "Thanks again for all your help and we will be sure to let Nell know you are thinking of her."

"Deeks, anything?" Callen looks like he is teetering between anger, fear, and an emotion that Deeks isn't sure he has ever remembered seeing on his leader's face before – helplessness. It shakes Deeks to see Callen so out of sorts. He tries to compartmentalize the information he just received, while feeling a bit apprehensive on how to proceed with this new version of Callen standing in front of him. In the same moment Callen reaches his hand towards his eyes, Deeks starts to speak cautiously.

"Those were two of the college friends Nell met up with last night. They went to a pub around the corner from here and everything was going fine for the first few hours, then Nell disappeared. She had excused herself to go to the bathroom and they noticed her over by the bar talking with a man." Deeks sees Callen's body tense at the revelation of the young analyst talking with a stranger in a pub. He proceeds while trying to block out the myriad of reactions he sees flashing across the senior agent's face.

"Nell and this guy talked for a minute and then danced for a couple songs. They said when a slow song started playing; Nell left the dance floor. Nell walked towards the bar again and they assumed the pair was getting a drink or something. When they couldn't find her after a short time, they figured she had left with the man." Again, the senior agent tenses visibly as he tries to gauge his responses to the information Deeks is giving him. Callen struggled to squelch the feeling he had coursing through his system. He recognized the feeling; he just couldn't allow himself to give it a name.

Deeks continues filling him in knowing the end was almost in sight, but cringing internally as he wasn't sure what Callen's reaction would be. "As the girls were getting ready to leave, the man approached them at their table to find out how he could contact Nell again. He gave some story about having had her number, but losing it. Her friends thought he was rather charming and decided to give him Nell's address."

Anger immediately takes its hold on Callen. "Are you serious!? They just handed some random guy her address based off the fact that he was charming. How could they put her at risk like that? Did it not dawn on them that she might have left there for a good reason? What the hell!?" Callen feels a strong hand on his shoulder as his voice rose to levels he hadn't even realized. He recognizes his partner's grip without even having to look in his direction. "C'mon G. It was an honest mistake made by friends with the best intentions. He seemed like a nice guy and Nell appeared to be enjoying dancing with him, so they gave him a way to contact her again. They don't see the world how we do. Why would they?"

He knows Sam is right, but he is so angry with the latest pieces of information and feels the need to get away for a minute. Walking towards the back of the house before he even realizes what he is doing, he vaguely recalls hearing Sam talking to Deeks. "Call Eric with the description they gave you. See if he can get any hits from the streets cams. After that, go talk to the owner of the pub. Find out who was working the bar last night and talk to them as well. Meet back at ops in one hour." Deeks nods as he pulls his phone out of his pocket once again. Sam walks in the direction of his partner.

He walks into the bedroom contemplating what his next step should be, when he sees Callen pacing angrily back and forth in the bedroom. "G," Sam spoke deliberately trying to determine why his partner was reacting as strongly as he is. He has seen Callen react to multiple injuries and incidents over the years, but never has he seen this strong of a reaction. "What's going on, man?"

Sam waits patiently watching Callen will himself to calm down. "I don't know Sam. It's like I can't get past seeing her face when I walked in this room. Did you see her arms? He grabbed her so hard at some point that he left an almost perfectly shaped handprint bruise. Her other arm has more bruising and swelling, not to mention the cut. I can't even begin to piece together what happened to cause that injury." He pauses his commentary while running his hands through his hair inhaling deeply. "It's like she isn't even here. I know it's probably shock, but from what? I'm almost afraid to know at this point. What if…"

Sam interrupts his friend placing a hand on his shoulder attempting to bring him down a notch. "We can't what if things, G. We gotta get the facts and go from there. We will get this guy, I promise that. But you need to pull yourself together if you are going to be any help to Nell at all. You can't keep letting your anger take over. She needs us to be strong for her." He waits for a brief second while Callen takes in the words he offered, then walks quietly out of the room to let his words take hold.

After taking a couple minutes to regain his composure, Callen returns to the living room alongside Sam as they listen to the forensic tech explain what they found. It seems there were several viable prints taken from multiple sources, though most are partial. The bullets were removed from the wall and sent for testing. The initial field test indicated there was indeed no blood found on the bullets. The evidence found was not giving them any new insight as to what happened.

He shakes his head as he realizes the bulk of the information they need is currently locked in one very scared analyst who appears to be trapped in a private hell. He is more than a little afraid of what she may reveal over the next hours and days, but knows it needs to happen regardless of how painful it is. The events of the past several hours were likely replaying like a twisted movie reel that couldn't be stopped in her head and he knew, at least logically, that talking was one of the first steps to emerging intact from this nightmare. Callen silently hopes Eric has something more concrete to work with.

Just a look between partners dictates the next steps to be taken. Callen follows Sam out his car and they pull away from Nell's home on their way back to ops. No words were needed as both men process the events of the morning in their own way. They are mentally preparing for what will come next and steeling themselves for whatever information Eric may or may not have found. Callen looks out the window as he recalls coming down this street not so long ago and the terror he felt upon realizing Nell was in danger.

Shaking his head in an attempt to clear the images playing in his mind, he pulls his phone from his pocket to call Kensi and check on Nell. He is discouraged to find she still isn't acknowledging anyone. She hasn't spoken a word to anyone since he found her. Callen worries it may be several more hours before she emerges from this shell. He knows enough about Nell to realize her mind needs time to make sense of what happened before anyone is going to reach her. He just prays they will be able to get her through the crisis with as little lasting damage as possible.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Notes**

**I don't own any of the characters, at least not any of the good ones! I do claim Detective John Michaels of the LAPD.**

**I am once again grateful and thrilled with all the follows on this story. The comments are great as well. I am not sure about others on the site, but the comments have a way of shifting the storyline into areas that we not necessarily thought of. Keep them coming!**

The tension at OSP is palpable. Everyone knows the stakes with one of their own being the center of a case. As Callen and Sam enter the bullpen area, they see Deeks coming out of the ops center where Eric has been working for just as many hours as they have attempting to piece together the last several hours. Hetty is on the phone talking animatedly to whoever is on the other line.

Scanning the area, Callen wonders if Kensi has made it back yet. As if sensing the question before it was asked, Deeks calls down from the stairwell, "Kens is on her way. Should be here in five."

Hetty finds her way over to Sam and Callen, with Deeks joining them by the set of four desks. "Mr. Callen, Mr. Hanna, Mr. Deeks. I gather you are all meeting with Eric to determine what exactly happened since Ms. Jones left last night." It's more of a statement than a question.

With an almost imperceptible nod of their heads, the men head to the stairwell. Kensi appears at their side out of nowhere matching their stride as they move quickly towards what they hope will be the start answers rather than more questions.

Taking their usual positions in the ops center, the agents get right down to business. Looking at Deeks, Callen begins the information gathering session. "Did we get a description of this guy from Nell's friends?"

"They worked with the artist separately and their descriptions are freaky similar. The guy stands about six foot, two inches. Caucasian, with black hair and green eyes; built like a brick wall and muscles that would apparently make a bodybuilder jealous. He had on jeans and a dark blue fitted shirt."

Deeks looks over at Sam and continues, "They caught sight of you and said he was built 'very much like that guy,' height and all." He puts his fingers up quoting into the air the exact words they had used.

"That explains why she was so scared when you reached for her," Callen remarks catching his partner's eyes. "She must have flashed back to the guy and thought you were him."

He could see Sam physically react as he realizes his presence added to her trauma. "Damn, I should've known not to reach for her like that." Callen places a hand on Sam's shoulder, squeezing gently, to let him know it was an honest mistake.

"We caught the guy on a couple cameras, but I haven't made it through all the footage yet." Eric's voice seems more tired than usual and everyone knows it's more about the situation than anything else.

"I caught him walking out of the pub, which gave me an image to work from. The problem is the image is so grainy I can't put it through the facial recognition program. I'm still looking through the footage in the area of Nell's house. There is a lot of footage to review. I have a couple more hours to work through between the street cams outside the pub and the ones by Nell's house. It's gonna take awhile since I can't use the facial recognition program."

Deeks jumps into the conversation relaying the information he gathered from his visit to the pub. "The bartender said it was a crazy night, but he did remember seeing Nell by the bar with a guy matching the description we have. He said he remembered them being pretty close together, but that she didn't seem too happy with the guy being in her space. Apparently, he was getting ready to step in when someone else tapped the guy on the shoulder. Next thing he knew, Nell was gone."

"What about cameras in the pub? Did they have any?" Callen looks to Deeks hoping they could get that lucky. They really needed a break at this point. Nell's friends weren't able to shine any real light on the evening and Nell was in no position to add anything to the mix. If they had internal cameras, then at least they may be able to see some sort of interaction between Nell and this guy.

Deeks nods affirmatively to Callen's question. He looks at Eric, who shakes his head wearily. "I haven't got to the footage yet." Without even skipping a beat, Deeks takes the seat usually reserved for Nell and starts to look through the footage given to him by the bartender. Eric offers a small smile thanking him for his stepping in. Deeks figures it's the least he can do while he listens to the rest of the team go over what they know.

Sam discusses the information from Nell's house, or lack thereof. The fingerprints gathered by the technicians at the scene have not returned any hits as of yet. The bullets were confirmed as being discharged from the Nell's service weapon. It was confirmed they did not have any trace amounts of blood on them indicating, as they had thought, the suspect was not hit. There was also blood found on the corner of the coffee table that was confirmed to be Nell's.

Callen looks over at Kensi, who had remained silent throughout the discussion so far, "Did Nell give you anything?" Kensi, also looking much too worn out for as early in the day as it was, shook her head. "She's still pretty out of it. I wasn't able to get her to say a word or even move for that matter. I got her to change clothes and then she found a bay window in the study. Didn't move the whole time I was there."

Looking over at Callen, Sam asks the next logical question; even though none of them were sure they want to hear the answer. "Kensi, what did the doctor say when she checked her out?" Sam joins the rest of team in holding his breath as they wait for Kensi's response.

"She has multiple bruises on her arms. One on the upper arm is in the shape of a handprint indicating she was grabbed pretty roughly at some point. The bruising on her other arm, as well as the cut, appears to be from a fall. There was too much bruising for any other valid explanation. She also has some minor bruising on her leg."

Sam interrupts, "That would explain the blood found on the edge of the coffee table. So, maybe she fell when she was trying to get away from this guy and hit her arm into the table knocking it over?"

Kensi shakes her head disagreeing with Sam. "No. The bruising is not from this morning. It wouldn't have been that visible if it was. It had to have been from last night. The cut was almost scabbed over by the time we got there. She must have fallen last night."

It's Eric's turn to interrupt as he reads some of the more pertinent information contained in the report filed by the doctor. "The bruising and contusion are consistent with a fall likely to have happened several hours prior to the evaluation of the patient. Further examination shows a possible injection site on the patient's upper left thigh as evidenced by a small puncture wound. Patient is given a round of antibiotics to avoid possible infection from a needle of unknown origin. Upon examination patient appears to be under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Response time is slowed and patient is unwilling or unable to verbally respond when asked questions. Blood was drawn to send for testing."

Everyone visibly flinches when Eric relays the newest piece of information indicating Nell may have been drugged. The team struggles to keep their reactions in check, but it is becoming more difficult for the group to remain objective. As much as they want to skip the report from the doctor, they know it is crucial to hear what she might to add.

Callen starts once again, "What did the blood work show Eric?"

He was pretty sure she was in shock. He knew there was a high probability that she may have been drugged, but he really hadn't let himself seriously entertain the notion. It was one thing to be manhandled and roughed up, but there were few reasons to drug someone and none of them had a fairy tale ending. The reasons that are now flying through his head are exactly why he had been blocking the likelihood Nell had been drugged.

"Nell had no alcohol in her system, which confirms her friends' assertion that she had not been drinking last night." Eric takes a deep intake of air as he struggles to read the next part of the report.

Deeks, reaching over, removes the Ipad from his hand taking over for the now distraught analyst. "Damnit. She had Rohypnol in her system. Had likely been injected at the site in her leg and, based on the levels still shown, would have caused her to lose consciousness for several hours within ten to twenty minutes of the drug being introduced." It was now Deeks turn to struggle with the words on the report.

Sam grips his fists in tight balls at his side, while Kensi leans over bending at the waist taking in slow deliberate breaths in an attempt to gain composure. Eric lowers his head into his hands and starts to visibly shake as the tears that had been threatening to fall all morning finally take over. Deeks puts a hand on the shoulder of the man everyone knows is Nell's best friend and draws him in close to his own shoulder in an effort to console him.

Callen feels the air escape from his lungs as his brain processes what the blood work had revealed. This blow hurt more than any other physical blow ever had.

He struggles with what he knew the next question had to be. He looks over at Deeks as he attempts to draw breath with lungs that don't seem to understand he desperately needs air. After trying several times to speak and losing his voice, he finally manages to ask the question on everyone's mind.

"Was she sexually assaulted, Deeks?" His voice is barely above a whisper, but resonates soundly throughout the ops center.

As if already knowing what question was on Callen's mind, Deeks had been scanning the report for an answer so he was able to give one as soon as Callen spoke.

"No. Thank God, no. She was not sexually assaulted." Now it's Deeks turn to fight the tears as he pats Eric on the shoulder firmly while handing him the Ipad. Making his way over to his partner, Deeks pulls her into an embrace as they both breathe a sigh of relief.

Sam reaches over to get Callen's attention and gives him a small smile. "That's good news, G."

Callen feels a wave of relief come over him at the same time he feels the anger building once again. The implied intent was clear as day for all in the room. This man had planned on assaulting her. It was no small miracle that Nell had somehow managed to escape.

As if on cue, Hetty appears in ops clearing her throat to get their attention. "I spoke with the Police Chief for the LAPD inquiring as to any possible cases that were in the same vein as the one Ms. Jones has the misfortune of being in the middle of. This is Detective John Michaels. He has some information that may well shed more light on the man we are looking for currently. Detective Michaels, you may have the floor."

"This case follows the same MO of a guy we've been tracking for about six months; slippery bastard that he is." The detective started laying folders on the table in the center of the ops center as he continues talking. "He's a real prick and doesn't seem to have much in the way of a conscience. He has kidnapped, tortured, and sexually assaulted three women that we know of. All the women were taken from pubs and they were released within forty-hours of their disappearance."

"The first two were so traumatized they haven't been able or willing to give any information. One of them is currently admitted to the psychiatric unit of the hospital and the other is in hiding. Her family refuses to share any information about her whereabouts. The third victim was able to give a detailed description of the man who kidnapped her."

Callen, Deeks, Kensi, and Sam had already gathered around the table and began looking through the various pictures and reports as Detective Michaels was speaking. The profile for his other victims was so similar to Nell that it caused each member of the team to cringe internally as they looked at the pictures showing just how much they looked alike.

The pictures are what hit the team the hardest. Detective Michaels continued talking while they sifted through the photographic evidence of the carnage this monster left in his wake. The women had all been photographed upon arrival to the hospital and there were a lot of pictures. A testament to just how brutal this man was.

"This guy is nothing short of sadistic. The women all had multiple injuries inflicted on them, but just enough to cause severe pain; not death. According to the details we got from victim three, he keeps them drugged during their torture sessions. The rest of the time they are completely lucid. He seems to prefer them conscious enough to know what is happening, but unable to do anything to stop him."

As the team was looking through the pictures, it struck them just how lucky Nell is to have gotten away from this man. He plays for keeps and his only focus seems to be the level of pain he inflicts without actually killing his victims. They all know how much worse psychological damage can be to heal; it can be worse than death.

Her escape from the pub could also explain why he returned to her house the next morning. The fact that he didn't come back for her that night when her friends gave him the address was the sticking point. It would have made more sense to get her while he knew she would be unconscious.

Pulling them from their morbid task is the sound of Eric's excited voice. "I got them! I found footage of them in the pub right before they danced and then again when Nell got away!" Eric pulls the footage up on the big screen as everyone turns to watch the scene unfold.

"There they are when they first start talking and then they move away from the bar to what I assume is the dance floor. And here they are again when Nell leaves the dance floor. He follows her. It doesn't look like she realizes he is behind her. He touches her arm and when she turns around, she startles slightly seeing him that close."

Callen feels the anger welling up again as he watches the footage of the man grabbing Nell by the arm roughly. He grows even more livid as he watches this man putting his hands all over her body as she struggles to break from his grasp. Now they know where the bruises on her leg came from.

He hears Deeks, who is directly to his right, mumble sonofabitch under his breath as he watches the scene. Sam and Kensi manage to remain quiet as they attempt to watch the footage as objectively as they can.

"Yep, that looks like the slimy bastard. Course this is the first bit of footage we actually have of the guy in action. Good to see he really does exist. Man, he really seems to be enjoying roughin' the little lady up. This one sure fits the theory of redheads being spitfires though; look at her, she's got spunk trying to fight him like that. It's just lucky she got away, cause he probably would have had a lot of fun with her."

Detective Michaels has the misfortune of being directly to the left of Callen while he is giving a running commentary of the thoughts as they enter his head.

Callen has the detective across the room and slammed into the wall by the exit to the ops center before any of them can react.

"Are you serious!? What the hell is wrong with you? That's one of ours on that tape." Callen's voice has an edge that even he doesn't recognize at the moment. He has his forearm successfully blocking any air coming into the man's lungs while his other hand is holding him tightly against the chest. Callen is visibly shaking with anger as he struggles with his emotions.

Sam moves swiftly to Callen's side pulling his arm slightly to allow the man access to some air before he passes out. He is still far too angry and lost in his head for Sam to completely break his hold on Detective Michaels.

In the same instant Sam moves to one side of Callen, Deeks steps to the opposite side in an attempt to physically remove Callen from the man. He is met with a forceful shove courtesy of the hand Callen had across Detective Michael's chest and falls backwards into the table located in the center of the ops room. Callen quickly places his hand back on the man's body, no longer holding him up by just his neck.

"MR. CALLEN!" Hetty's voice booms loudly throughout the ops center.

Callen's brain registers Hetty's interruption, but he is still far too caught up in his anger to allow for any kind of concession.

"Mr. Callen. Let go of Detective Michaels and remove yourself from my ops center immediately. If you think this kind of reaction is going to help Ms. Jones, you are sadly mistaken."

Callen releases his grip on the man backing up ever so slightly maintaining a steely gaze that threatens to bore a hole directly into the man's eyes. His hands remain balled up in tight fists at his sides and he can feel himself shaking from the level of anger coursing through his body.

"Mr. Callen! Leave now!" Hetty voice is lower than it was initially, but it is of such authority that he knows he has no choice but to comply. As he flies out of the ops center and down the stairs, his team is left to wonder how they are going to get through this case intact.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note – Not mine once again, except Jonas Carmandy and William Herrold. **

**Thanks again for all the comments. Keep them coming….they really do help with the mood of the story and can give me ideas I didn't have initially. I also want to thank all those who are following the story and have it on alert.**

**I have struggled a bit more with this chapter and I have to say I'm not entirely happy with it, but I didn't want to delay any longer than I have. Please let me know if you guys feel my off vibe and why…I can't peg it at this point.**

It's rare for Callen to completely lose control like that and he knows it. The level and intensity of anger shocks him as much as he assumes it is shocking everyone else. He has been in situations like these where one of his team is injured or in danger and he doesn't react this way. But this is her. This is Nell.

It's like he can't even breathe anymore. The oxygen just won't deposit itself into his lungs. He feels like he is drowning in a sea of emotions that he doesn't have time to wade through. "DAMNIT! What the hell is wrong with me?" Callen shouts the question to the walls, but then an unexpected answer comes from the doorway.

"You got several people wondering the same thing, G."

Hetty had motioned for Sam to follow Callen out of the ops center. It wasn't really necessary though as the man was already heading out the door as Hetty spoke.

"I get the guy was talking like he didn't know she was part of our team. We were all ready to strangle him, but you…"

Sam's words are interrupted by a still very angry Callen. "He was talking like she was just some random woman who got grabbed. What the hell was with that running dialogue anyway? He should never be talking about anyone that way. Why the hell would he talk like when he knows Nell is one of ours?"

The questions come out disjointed and Sam knows Callen is struggling to make this about all the women; not just Nell.

"I don't know, man. Guy is an idiot. Maybe has a death wish. Who knows, G." Sam moves across the locker room closing the distance between himself and his partner. Before Sam could say anything else, Callen moves to side-step him heading for the exit.

"I gotta get out of here. I'm going to the safe house to see Nell. Maybe I can get her to talk to me." Callen's motion is stopped by Sam's strong hand on his shoulder.

"Hang on, G." Sam's words are spoken calmly and with enough force that Callen knows he is expected to comply. Except he is still too wrapped up in the stream of thoughts going through his head to entertain the notion of compliance as he makes eye contact with Sam.

Without missing a beat, Callen jerks his body away from Sam's grip and makes a move to exit the room once again. Expecting the resistance, Sam answers with his own motion and it is now Callen's turn to be up against a wall.

Callen hadn't expected that. He expected a lecture. He expected frustration as he walked past him. He did not expect to be pinned against a wall under the strong arms of Sam Hanna. He is shocked enough that he doesn't even attempt to move.

Sam speaks calmly once again, "You gotta calm down, G. Get your head on straight. Going to Nell with all the negative vibes you got coming off you is only going to upset her."

Sam keeps his grip on Callen holding him in place as he waits for the words to penetrate the anger. After a brief delay, Callen puts his hands up to either side of his head as if surrendering and nods ever so slightly at the man towering over him.

As Sam's hands leave his body he feels himself slip to the ground. His legs unable to hold him up any longer, he leans against the wall with his head falling backwards and allows himself to break.

Although no tears come, Sam is well aware of the battle Callen is fighting. Sam knows his partner well enough to see he has feelings for Nell and that he is hurting. He lets his partner get lost in himself for a minute before breaking the silence. "What's going on, G?"

Throwing his hands up in the air and lifting his head simultaneously he lets out a nervous laugh, "I wasn't there man. I didn't get there in time and she had to go through all this by herself." He looks at Sam hoping maybe there is something he can say to alleviate all the guilt he feels.

"You aren't making any sense here. As soon as she called, you went straight there. How could it have gone any differently?" Sam's confusion is showing now as he watches his partner struggling in front him.

"Why is this hitting you so hard, G? You've seen all of us under attack and watched as we got shot or beat up. What is so different?"

"She's part of the team, Sam! Of course I'm gonna feel guilty!" Callen regrets having said anything at all. He knows his reaction is way beyond what it should be for the reason to simply be she is member of their team.

He knows she holds a different place in his world, but he also knows that he can't let himself go there right now. Callen knows he has to separate himself from his emotions to be of any real help. Logically he knows that, but as more and more information is revealed he feels himself losing any bit of control he thinks he may have left.

"Nah, that's not it, G." Sam is looking so intently at Callen he swears he can read his mind. "And I know it's not because she's a woman. Kensi has had her share of things happen over the years and you never react like this. Never, man."

Sam knows Callen has been paying more attention to Nell over the past few months. He sees him watching her when he thinks no one else is paying attention. It's subtle enough that he doubts anyone else has even picked up on it, except Hetty of course.

He knows that Callen had been developing a different relationship with the young analyst, but also knows how hard it is for Callen to let people in. Sam decided early into his discovery to let them do their little dance and figure things out without his interference. Until now.

"You have feelings for her, dontcha' G. And I don't mean she's like a little sister to me type feelings."

Callen freezes for a brief second as the words translate in his mind. He lifts his body from the ground, looking his partner directly in the eyes and speaks very deliberately, "I'm going to see Nell. If anyone needs me, call my cell."

He knows Sam has hit the target with just one sentence, but he also knows he isn't going to discuss it right then. Now is not the time or place, and Sam certainly isn't the one he intends to talk to first if anything comes of the revelation. Truth be told, he still needs to figure out what the hell is going on. He doesn't think adding in the opinions of others is going to do anything, but add a new level to the already complicated puzzle.

"You realize that answers more than any words you could have said, right G!" He hears Sam call out as he exits the locker room.

As Callen walks through the bullpen, he sees Kensi and Deeks, but already knows he will not be handing out any sort of explanation. He hears Kensi smack Deeks in the arm as he is passing them and figures he must have been preparing to say something. Kensi was a smart girl indeed.

"Ow! Seriously, really!" He can see the look Kensi shoots Deeks without even having to turn around. They have all seen it more times than they can count.

Sam comes out of the locker room immediately after Callen and meets up with the other two to discuss what comes next. Kensi looks in the direction Callen just went and then back at Sam. The question doesn't need asked because she knows Sam will understand exactly what she wants to know.

"He's going to see Nell. Said to call him if we need him. I would say it's safe to assume he will be taking there the rest of the night, so we can let the protection detail know to keep a perimeter when he gets there."

The team heads back up the steps to the ops center to review more footage and piece together the information brought by Detective Michaels.

The man was good that was one thing they were certain of. He was methodical with the first two women. From what they gathered, he appears to have pre-planned the events he carried out in regards to the torture of the women. He definitely had a type and Nell fit it perfectly.

The details relayed in the interviews of the latest victim indicated he had very specific ideas in mind on how they should act and what they should be able to do. She said he got frustrated with her when she didn't have the knowledge to carry out the tasks he thought she should. He kept saying she wasn't saying or doing things the way she would. Question of the day is…who was she?

The team could not find any ties between these women except they all shared similar physical characteristics. They all looked strikingly similar. Kensi and Deeks had combed through their lives, even going as far as to interviewing their families again, and had come up with no leads.

The women had never crossed paths and they were from different walks of life. This guy was methodical with every step of his planning with the exception of how he picked his victim. It was going to be damn near impossible to find this guy if there was no pattern to picking up the women.

He appears to have changed his timetable. That was something else they noticed. The first three abductions happened about a month apart from each other. They couldn't really tell the significance based on such a small number of women, but that fact that he didn't wait as long between abductions was something. He was either getting bolder or something triggered him to move up the timetable.

Nell's attempted abduction came just four days after the latest victim was released. He didn't appear in control with the attempt to take Nell. It appeared he had reacted much less rationally with her than the others. Between the interviews collected by the LAPD and the little bit of footage they had, the man was never openingly aggressive with the other women. It appeared he had duped them with his charm and they left with him willingly.

In Nell's case, he was aggressive and didn't seem to care who noticed him. It was almost as if he had not intended on grabbing anyone that night; like she was the trigger that moved the timetable. They really needed to find out why he jumped the gun with Nell. What made him snap and grab her the way he did?

The pubs were all in the same general area. They narrowed down the radius to fairly small number, but there were so many pubs that it was going to be difficult to narrow down a small enough list to work from. Deeks got put on this daunting task for no other reason than he had seen more than his fair share of this location during his many undercover stints.

The first step he took was to find any similarities between the locations where the women were taken. He quickly determines that all the locations have dance floors. He isn't entirely sure that is a definitive factor in the choosing the location, but he has to narrow down the choices somehow. The lack of information has him flying blind and grasping at whatever makes sense.

After finding a total of thirty-three pubs in the radius, he eliminates twenty of them based of their lack of dance space. Using the fact that all the women were taken from a different pub, he eliminates those locations as it seems unlikely he would strike the same place twice. This elimination removes four more pubs from the equation.

Looking at the remaining nine, he struggles to narrow the parameter more. After researching the remaining pubs, he eliminates five more based on their clientele; he doubts the man will be looking in a gay bar for any victims. That left four contenders.

Eric has been sifting through footage of the street cams from the other crime scenes to see if anything useful comes up. Just as everything seems to be a huge lesson in frustration, Deeks hears Eric start talking to himself quietly. "Wait a minute. I see you now. Thought you could get away from me, huh. It was close, I will admit that. Blame it on one set of eyes instead of two you bastard."

Deeks, being closest to Eric's location, motions for Sam and Kensi to join him. Leaning in close to the technical analyst, he says, "Whatcha got Eric?"

Eric holds up his hand waving it in Deeks' face while shaking his head. Leaning back slightly to avoid the motion, Deeks looks back at Kensi and Sam. They all remain quiet as they watch Eric move from one set of footage to another at a pace that has them wondering how Eric can catch anything at all.

"Gotcha!" Eric's voice holds more luster and conviction than anyone's has in the last several hours.

"OK. All the scenes have a van in common. A 2011 GMC Savana, dark blue with California license plates. I knew this guy had to screw up somewhere!" He smiles widely as he continues.

"This van is outside all the locations for anywhere from a few hours to several days before the abductions. In the first abduction, the van was parked in front of the pub for two days, and then disappears afterwards never to be seen again. The second and third abductions, the van was there for ten and three hours respectively. For Nell's case, the van was there for three."

Eric now has everyone's undivided attention as he pulls up the footage from the streets surrounding Nell's house. "There it is again! We found the van this scumbag is using!" They all breathe a sigh of relief as the pieces finally seem to be coming together.

"He parked it at the end of Nell's street about five houses from hers. I'm guessing he was planning on taking her from her house this morning. Now let's see if we can get a registration on you."

Swiping his hands easily across the keyboard he brings up a series of screens as he searches. "We got a name, Jonas Carmandy! Let me see what else I can find." Eric's enthusiasm and excitement at this newest piece of information has the whole team feeling optimistic for the first time today.

As he puts all the new information on the big screen, the team turns to look over what has been found. They were quietly discussing possibilities when they are interrupted by the slamming of Eric's keyboard against the console where he is working.

"Damnit! It's a dead end. He doesn't even exist! Everywhere I look, he isn't there." The technical operator sends his chair flying backwards as he abruptly pushes past Sam leaving ops in frustration.

The team watches as Eric flies down the stairs and decide it's probably better to let him calm down on his own while they regroup. Sam pulls out his cell while walking out onto the landing overlooking the bullpen, "G."

Kensi quickly moves into Eric's seat at the console pulling up street cams from another location. Deeks, recognizing the flicker in his partner's eyes and the definitive purpose with which she moved towards the computer, immediately joins her. "What are you thinking, Kens?"

"Carmandy doesn't exist, right? So that means the registration has to be bogus too. Something doesn't sit right with me about that. It's probably easy enough for someone to forge a registration, but for it to be in system is a whole other thing."

Kensi speeds through footage leading into a parking garage and is ecstatic to find her hunch pay off. "There it is again! It's the same van! This is the footage from the employee parking garage, the bastard works for the Department of Motor Vehicles!"

Deeks makes a beeline for the exit and yells for Eric to get back up there. He just hopes he is somewhere close. "Eric, man, get back up here! Kensi found something. We need your fingers to work their magic and walk us through this!"

Just as he was about to go looking for him, Eric comes from around the corner flying up the steps two at a time. Deeks looks over at Sam motioning for him to join them inside as he turns on his heels towards the ops center.

Eric fingers are flying across the keyboard as Sam comes up behind. It always amazes Sam to see how fast a case can turn and he is happy to see this one moving forward exponentially, especially after the long hours of getting nowhere.

He listens intently to as Kensi fills him in on what she found. He is also formulating what the next step will be. He knows the senior-agent-in-charge is not in the mindset to follow any leads through. Callen has already let Sam know he was staying put for the night, but wants updates as necessary.

If anything significant comes from this lead, he knows Callen is close by. He also knows that with his current frame of mind, Callen isn't going to be much help to the team. He is battling too much of his own emotional connection to this case for him to think clearly and that would place everyone in danger.

"You're amazing Kensi! The guy is indeed employed by the California Department of Motor Vehicles." Eric is once again beaming and hopeful.

As Eric pulls up the employee list on his iPad as he moves over the big screen. "Jonas Carmandy is actually William Herrold. He is employed as a janitor and cleans the building at night after everything closes up."

Pulling up various pieces of information found in the database under his true name, Eric hits a bit of a snag. "He's off the grid. The home address the guy listed was condemned by the city two years ago and is on the tear down list. He's got no open bank accounts, no credit cards, not a thing listed in his name."

Sam looks over at Kensi and Deeks having already determined the next move. "Kensi you come with me to the DMV. We're gonna talk to his boss and co-workers. Find out whatever we can."

Deeks, you head over to the LAPD. Liase. Fill in Detective Michaels while you're there too. We meet back here in one hour."

"Eric, keep digging." With a nod of his head, the analyst returns to his computer screens and gets to work with a second wind he knows will keep him going as long as necessary.

The separation from his partner would have struck a chord with Deeks had the circumstances been different, but this is Nell and he knows it is a necessary step in order to get the quickest set of results. Time is a luxury he is pretty sure they don't have much of, especially in light of this guy speeding up the timetable.

Having beaten everyone back to ops, Deeks combs through the information they have as he waits for Sam and Kensi. He has nothing new to add to the pot, but is more confident than ever that things are at least going in the right direction.

That is, until he sees his partner's face as she enters the ops center. He catches her gaze as she nods her head solemnly moving to stand next to him. Sam enters looking frustrated; guess it's his turn now as it seems almost all of them have left at some point during the day frustrated with the pace of everything.

"We got nothing. Herrold hasn't been in to work for nine days. He put in for vacation time and didn't leave any way to reach him. Boss and co-workers all say he's quiet and keeps to himself. They have never seen him so much as step on a bug." Sam sounds thoroughly disgusted as he relays the lack of information to everyone in the room.

Hetty's voice interrupts the momentary silence as the team struggles to regroup. "Everyone go home for the night. We have done as much as we can for today. I need you all well-rested."

She glances around the room stopping to make eye contact with each member of the team making it clear they have no room to argue with her.

"Mr. Callen is on protection detail for Ms. Jones for the rest of this evening until morning. I will see you all tomorrow." Hetty is aware the toll this case is already taking on her team and she intends to keep them as rested as possible to ensure they can focus as needed.

The team reluctantly relinquishes their spots in the op center and move quietly; the frustration of day hitting them as they filter out the door.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Notes – Not mine…unfortunately.**

** Comments are most definitely welcome and helpful. This story seems to be taking a life of its own and I hope I am at least doing the characters some justice. It is a rather enjoyable thing to be writing. I apparently should have done this much sooner!**

** Here is the much awaited Callen/Nell interaction. There is much more to come and I hope you all enjoy!**

Callen reached his car in seconds and threw himself into the driver's seat. Slamming his hands against the steering wheel, he realizes that he has to get a better hold on his emotions. It's becoming more apparent this case is going to be his undoing if he isn't careful. He knows he shouldn't have reacted the way he did, with Detective Michaels or Sam. He just snapped when he heard what Michaels was saying. The fact that Sam had pegged him wasn't really surprising, but it was something he also isn't ready to talk about.

Taking a deep breath, he puts the car into gear and drives the short distance to the safe house. He wills himself to calm down as the distance between himself and Nell lessens. Sam is right about one thing. Nell can't see him this stressed. She needs calm and Callen knows he has to pull it off if he wants to make sure she feels safe. He cringes as the memories of that morning flood his head and forces himself to think about how happy she was before they left work the day before.

He remembers back to just before she left the building and how happy she looked. She had such a bounce to her gait that it reminded of a kid taking their allowance to the candy store. He marveled at how free she appeared. It literally made his heart skip a beat when he saw her face lit up with joy.

He recalls earlier that day when he came up behind her while she had been refilling her coffee cup. He had a question to ask, but seeing her seemingly lost in thought gave him the perfect opportunity to get much closer to her than he would otherwise.

_Leaning down close to her ear he whispered lightly, "What are you thinking about?" He laughed softly at how she had jumped. He was also very happy that she hadn't been holding her cup in her hands. She turned around and smacked him on the arm._

_ "Wouldn't you like to know Mr. G. Callen. You scared me half to death! How am I supposed to enjoy a night out with friends if I'm in the hospital being treated for a heart attack!" He could tell by the grin inching across her face that she wasn't nearly as traumatized as she was trying to put across. _

_ "A night with friends huh, I heard something about that earlier when I passed by. So, where are you and your friends headed? Anyone I should look into before you go?" He was smirking as he talked to her knowing she would give him that look. _

_ Well aware he had no right to be asking about her personal life, he found himself fighting back a twinge of jealousy as he imaged her going out with some other man. Honestly, it was the possibility of what could occur following the going out that got to him the most. He figured if he kept the conversation light, then maybe he could get some details that would ease his mind. _

_ Nell gave him the exact look his was hoping for and then laughed at the senior agent as she shook her head, "It's just my roommates from college. No need to run background checks. We're going to a pub to catch up." _

_ With that she grabbed her coffee and started walking away from Callen. After a couple steps, she paused and turned around slightly locking eyes with him while he took a sip of his coffee, "It nice to go out with just the girls every once in awhile." Then she was off. _

_ He about choked on his coffee when she threw that last bit into the conversation. It was more the look in her eyes and the way she seemed to need to clarify the intent of the evening that got him. _

_ He fought to push the thoughts out of his head as he let what she said sink in. How the hell could she know he was hoping no men were in the equation? He decided he was over thinking the whole exchange and made his way back to his desk to work on paperwork once again._

Pulling slowly into the driveway, he takes another deep breath as he prepares himself for what he may find once inside the safe house. As far as he has heard, Nell hasn't spoken to anyone and has not eaten at all since…well, since he has no idea when. He assumes she would have eaten last night at some point, but certainly nothing today.

Upon entering the house, he gets an update from one of the agents in the home. As he redirects everyone outside to maintain a perimeter around the property, it becomes clear they have already received word they are not to remain inside the house as long as he is there. He clarifies they know not to re-enter the home unless directly ordered by him or his team.

He has been in this home one other time when they had secured a witness, so he at least knows the layout. It is a beautiful property with three bedrooms and a study that rivals any he has seen. He suspects Hetty has had a lot of say in the decorating of this particular safe house because it is very much her style.

He sees a piano in the corner of the sitting room that he doesn't remember being there before. As he walks slowly through the house, he finds himself growing apprehensive as he tries to determine how best to reach Nell. He knows the process will take time and he has to move slowly, but he also knows they need answers.

Peeking his head into the study, he sees her small frame sitting in the bay window just where Kensi suspected she would still be. She is leaning back against the hard wood that frames the window. One of the most unsettling things for Callen is seeing Nell being so….unlike Nell. Her usual fire is lost and he doesn't even know if she is willing to fight to get it back.

He walks across the room and joins her on the cushion lying across the sill. He watches her with worried eyes as she still seems to be so wrapped up in her own thoughts. Leaning his head back, he closes his eyes deciding to give her the chance to acknowledge him first. It's the least he can do at this point he figures. Give her some semblance of control.

He isn't entirely sure how long he rested there before he feels her gaze. He lifts his head to meet her eyes and smiles softly when he sees her looking at him back at him. He has never been so happy to see acknowledgment from anyone before that moment. He was truly worried she would be lost for much longer and was heartened to see her coming around. Callen tries not to think about how no one else has been able to get her to respond, but him.

"Welcome back," he says quietly.

She looks at him with the saddest expression he has ever seen grace her beautiful face and watches as she gets up and leaves the room. Taking a breath, Callen lifts his body from the cushion and follows her into the living room. He has no idea what to expect and that leaves him more anxious than he is willing to admit.

"You need to eat something," he hears himself say. Entering the kitchen, he looks through the fridge before settling on some soup that had been left by the team who set up the house. He heats the soup up and fills two mugs with the contents. He is hoping he may have better luck getting Nell to eat something if he joins her.

He carefully carries both mugs into the living room and hands one to Nell. Seeing her sitting in the corner of the couch, she looks so fragile and small. He notes that she is all but cowering against the burgundy fabric. Callen feels his heart pull and he fights the urge to envelope her in his arms.

Callen sits on the opposite side of the couch and watches as she blows lightly on the broth trying to cool it enough to eat. As they sit in silence, he works on cooling the contents of his own mug. She takes a couple of sips and then sets the mug on the table in front of them. He frowns slightly waiting to see what her next move will be, but knowing she really needs to get some food in her system.

As if just noticing the bruises for the first time, he sees her examine her arms while she seems to be remembering what happened. Callen considers his next move and settles for telling her what they know about her bruises. He determines that the direct approach is probably best because he knows Nell prefers knowing all the information.

"The bruise on your left arm was from where you were grabbed by someone at the pub. He was pretty rough with you from the footage we were able to recover. The doctor also said you have some bruising on your leg and the footage confirms that was caused by him as well. The bruising and cut on your right arm are from falling into your coffee table at home. We know the man drugged you at some point using a needle. We assume it was when he was restraining you at the pub."

He watches as she takes in the information. Callen is hoping she may add something to the mix. She looks up from her arm and he sees a flicker of something he can't place flash across her face. She seems lost in time as it appears she is trying to recall the details of the past several hours. He watches as a myriad of emotions wave quickly over her face and wonders if maybe he should have kept his mouth shut.

His silent question is answered when without warning Nell shoots up from the couch and runs to the back of the house slamming a door as she reaches her destination. He leaps from his position on the couch and goes down the hallway following her. He mentally kicks his own ass for being so blunt.

He is met in the hallway with the sounds of her throwing up in the bathroom. He knocks on the door as he opens it slowly to check on her. She is leaning over the toilet unceremoniously loosing what tiny bit of food she had in her system.

He bends down behind her and reaches out to gently rub her back as her body convulses. She recoils violently and skitters to the corner by the toilet. The fear in her reaction makes Callen realize just how lost in her own mind she is at that moment. Pulling his hand back, he whispers quietly, "It's Callen, Nell. You're safe now." Locking eyes with her, he sees so much fear in her eyes that he almost looses it right there.

He sits on the floor next to her using the tub as support and decides to be silent. He runs a hand through his hair as he realizes that he pushed too much too soon. It dawns on him just how out of his element he is right now. Give him every other situation and he is able to adapt with expertise. Emotions, that's not his thing. He leans his head in between his knees as he locks his hands behind his neck. "I'm sorry, Nell. I am so sorry," he whispers more to himself than her.

After a few seconds, he feels a light touch on his upper arm and it takes him a moment to realize what is happening. He knows he is taking a big risk, but he decides to take a chance by lifting his head. Turning his head in Nell's direction, he is relieved to see her head now firmly resting on his shoulder. It really shouldn't seem like that big of a thing, but to both of them, in this moment, it's monumental.

Callen doesn't move for the longest time as he lets himself get lost in the feeling. She is right there, close enough for him to take in her scent, and he is overwhelmed by the level of trust this moment takes. Considering the events of late, he can't even put into words the way it makes him feel knowing she isn't afraid he will hurt her.

After a much too brief span of time, Nell slowly stands moving past Callen and out the door. He already misses her being close and he shakes his head at how quickly this young woman found a place in his life that was never supposed to be re-opened. He already knows he will spend as much time as needed to ensure she is able to heal from this trauma.

He pushes himself to his feet and walks into the front of the house. As he enters the living room he hears the soft sounds of the piano. He sees Nell seated on the piano bench, lightly fingering the keys. Walking over to the piano, he sits silently beside her. It dawns on Callen that Hetty must have somehow known Nell plays the piano and had it delivered as a tool toward her recovery.

Some people say music is the language of the soul. It is the open pathway to express so much more than words could ever say. The ability to fully see one's emotional journey can be heard through the music that they play or listen to at any given moment. Callen can say with a high level of certainty he has never experienced music to that extent, but he knows watching Nell just how much the music is speaking for her.

Having learned his lesson from the last time he chose to speak, he opts to just listen. After several minutes of playing, Nell looks over at Callen and speaks softly, "I saw you watching me before I left work yesterday. You kinda suck at this secret agent thing sometimes. You know that?" A small smile glosses over her lips as she turns back to the piano keys.

As if unsure how to proceed, Callen watches her for a minute; it was an interesting starting point for a conversation considering the circumstances. Seeing this as an opportunity to promote normalcy, he decides to just let the banter continue for as long as she allows it.

"Ever dawn on you that I wanted you to catch me? I mean, being the amazing secret agent I am, would it make sense I could get discovered without meaning to?" He smiles as he hears her laugh quietly. His heart warms as he realizes she is fighting to come back to them. He can't help but hope she may well be fighting more for him than the others. He knows how hard the battle is going to be, but she's trying.

They sit comfortably beside each other not needing any more words. Callen listens as Nell plays the piano and wishes he knew what piece she was fingering. He watches her as she seems to just be enjoying the feel of the keys under her quite capable hands. The ease at which she is producing the melody shows the amount practice she puts in and he wonders when she finds the time.

"Do you wanna go for a walk?" Her voice startles him as he finds that he was much more wrapped up in the music coming from the piano than he realized. He nods his head in the affirmative as holds his hand out to help her stand.

Much to his surprise she takes a hold of his hand and allows herself to be lifted from the bench. Callen leads Nell to a door off the dining room and opens it slowly revealing an open backyard with a large privacy fence surrounding its borders. As they walk outside, he sees her blink several times as her eyes adjust to the light.

Nell lets go of Callen's hand and moves slowly into the grass. He watches her from the small deck. She takes a deep breath of fresh air and looks around the space. The yard isn't large, but it's enough space to enjoy the sunlight. She walks through the grass kicking at the blades as she moves slowly. He can see she is struggling as to whether to speak as he watches her from the steps leading into the grass. The decision apparently made just a few seconds later when he hears her voice.

"You know what I was thinking just before my friends came by and we left?" Callen knew the question didn't need a response from him, so he waits as she looks off at the clouds. "I shouldn't be wearing these clothes. I never wear clothes like that. There are reasons I don't wear that stuff." Pausing once again to a place he can't know, she continues speaking quietly, "But, I just wanted to reach back in time. Be who I was before. Relax and have fun with friends for a night, ya know?"

Callen is floored as he listens to her speak. The agent in him knows he should read between the lines; try to decipher the things that she is not outwardly saying. The man in him, the one who would do anything to right this wrong for her, latches onto the one point. And he is baffled that she even implying what she is.

"Those clothes had nothing to do with what happened." Callen is trying to impress upon her the importance of knowing that fact. That's society's reaction speaking for her; the misguided notion that she deserved it somehow because of how she presented herself that night. It pisses him off that assumption has somehow permeated her thoughts.

"You could've been wearing clothes that showed nothing and it wouldn't have changed the outcome." He moves in front of her trying desperately to get her to look at him as he speaks. "Nell, this was not your fault. You have to know that."

She ponders what he says and then looks at him continuing, "I know. I mean I know that I'm supposed to know that. I just…don't know." She closes her eyes and turns away from him unable to handle the raw emotion she sees in his eyes. His reaction, his disbelief, shouldn't be getting to her this way. It's an expected reaction and she knows that.

"I remember getting dressed. I remember leaving my house. I remember being with my friends. We danced and laughed and danced some more. It was so nice to just get away from everything." He hears her voice get softer as she continues to speak.

Turning back to face Callen, "I remember him. He came up to me at the bar and asked me to dance. I didn't see any harm in dancing with him. The songs were upbeat, so we didn't even have to touch." She takes a breath as she reviews the details in her mind. "The music slowed down and I walked away from him. I told him I was going to the bathroom. I remember feeling a touch on my arm and I turned around. He was right there, Callen. I couldn't even move he was so close to me."

Callen holds his breath as he watches her struggle with the memories. It takes every fiber of his being to restrain himself when all he wants to do is gather her up in his arms. He wishes he could make it all go away, but knows even he isn't that talented. He can feel his own tears threatening to fall as she continues.

"I remember him grabbing me when I tried to go around him. He gripped my arm so tight I thought it was going to break. And then his other hand." She pauses as she takes a deep breath, her voice trembling when she speaks again.

"God, his other hand. It was all over me. I tried to fight him, I really tried Callen." She locks eyes with him at that moment. He can see the tears taking over as she pleads with him to believe her. His heart breaks in that moment watching her. Before he has time to think it through, he reaches out pulling her into his arms and holding her tight against his chest as his own quiet tears fall with hers.

"Shh…it's alright," he murmurs softly into her hair so many times he loses count. He holds her like this until he can feel her breathing calm down, then he pulls her away slightly so he can see her face. Reaching down he places his hand on her cheek wiping the remaining tears away as he tries to convey how safe she is with him through touch instead of words.

She pulls away from his embrace, shakes her head, and pushes forward with her memories, "Someone or something got his attention. He loosened his grip up enough that I pulled away and just ran straight for the door. I remember thinking if I could just get to my house everything would be fine." She pauses looking back at the clouds again. He sees her start to drift back into her mind.

Callen steps in front of her and shudders involuntarily at the realization that he needs to push her about what happened at her house. He knows it's a gamble, but they need answers and he wants to be the one talking to her about everything.

The whole thing about shock being a fickle creature really is true. He has had more than his fair share of experiences with shock. Taking another deep breath, he reaches over and touches her shoulder softly with his hand, "Nell, what happened at your house?"


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Notes – Aren't currently mine, won't ever be mine…but I can play with them for a short spell!**

** This chapter grew to a much bigger number than expected, so I split it. It actually worked out well because I was selling the original ending a little short in my opinion because this was getting so long. The split will allow me to add details and work more meat into the story.**

** Let me know what you guys think of this one. As always comments are more than welcome and actually do help with the storyline (gives me ideas I may not have had otherwise). It also gives me your perception of how I am using the characters.**

** I added another story tonight, Drug of Choice, and would love if you guys check that one out as well. The setting was one that I was originally trying to incorporate into this story (at least when I first thought about this story), but has become very apparent the scene would not work here. So I put it out there on its own.**

The expression on Nell's face makes Callen immediately re-think the question; it appears he may have pushed her too far. She momentarily looks like she is going to bolt again as she processes his words, but instead takes a deep intake of air and speaks, "I got home and I remember thinking my training sucked cause I had no way to stop that man from grabbing me and putting his hands all over me."

She looks at Callen and laughs softly, "I really should have signed up for extra sessions." He gives a sad smile in return as he sees her lay the blame squarely on herself once again. He makes a mental note to talk to her about the blame game later. He decides to stay quiet for a moment and see if she continues; slightly surprised when she does.

"I locked my door. By the time I did that and turned around the room was spinning. I tried to go over to the couch because I was having trouble seeing and balancing. I remember falling and vaguely recall hitting something on my way down." She realizes it is becoming more difficult to remember what happened and notices Callen watching her as she struggles to put everything in the right order.

Her frustration builds as the memories seem to be less clear the more she tries to remember. Nell was able to readily recall the events at the pub, but now her thoughts seem scattered. Things are so disjointed in her mind that she feels she can't distinguish between fiction and reality. She breathes in an irritated breath as she looks at Callen, "I can't remember the stuff at home as clearly, it's like watching a TV with bad reception; everything keeps going in and out."

Callen takes a moment to consider whether giving her some more information is a good idea or not; it didn't exactly work well the first go around. Quickly coming to the realization that he has no choice but to offer up an explanation, if for no other reason than to assure her there is a good reason for her memories being scattered, he takes a breath as he considers what to say in an attempt to put her mind more at ease.

"He gave you Rohypnol while you were at the pub. There is a mark on your upper thigh where he most likely injected you while…," he pauses there unable to get the words out. Instead he opts to leave the obvious meaning for her to conclude and continues, "It would have taken ten to twenty minutes for the effects to hit your system. By the time you got home, it was hitting your system full force. Based on the cut and marks on your arm combined with the overturn coffee table, we assume you fell into the coffee table at some point last night. That must have been what you felt as you passed out."

He watches her carefully as she takes in the information. She closes her eyes again and pulls her hands through her short hair exhaling sharply. After a few seconds, she shakes her head as if she is attempting to clear cobwebs that no one but her can see. Callen's mind races as he tries to determine the best way to proceed. He comes to the realization that he no longer cares about their need for answers as much as he needs to make sure she knows he is there for her; as more than just an agent looking for a break in the case.

"I'm done talking." She looks him straight in the eyes like she can see into his soul, "I can't do this anymore right now, Callen." She turns and immediately walks back into the house. Her tone made it clear that she was not emotionally capable of handling any more strolls down memory lane.

After taking a few minutes to collect himself, he goes back into the house. He needs to make sure Nell is alright. Callen is well aware the turmoil he is feeling is nothing compared to hers; but the emotional rollercoaster he has been on for the last several hours is taking its toll.

Walking through the dining room and kitchen, he glances into the study expecting to find her there. When he doesn't see her he feels his heart skip a beat and is momentarily transported back to the same sense of dread he had felt that morning. The fact that he skips straight to fear cements just how much she has come to mean to him. It really isn't like him to jump to conclusions.

He feels himself reaching instinctively for his weapon. Before he can remove it from the holster, he hears the shower turn on. Releasing his weapon and shaking his head, he walks into the bedroom calling out to her. He just needs to hear her voice, and then he can relax. "You good, Nell?" Her response is a quick, "Yep."

Walking out to the bedroom, he mentally kicks himself for making nothing into something. He determines he needs to relax or he going to drive himself crazy. He really is in deep if he can't let her out of his sight for two minutes without reaching for his weapon thinking something happened. It's becoming increasingly clear, he is going to have to work on his fears as much as help her through hers. He shakes his head as he moves towards the kitchen.

His phone vibrates interrupting his thoughts. He answers it quickly after seeing his partner's name appear on the screen. "What's up?" Sam fills Callen in on the new development. He doesn't really have time to fill Sam in on anything as the call ends abruptly. He bids Sam good night after he reminds his partner to call if he is needed.

Callen moves about the kitchen with a definitive purpose. He is so focused on cooking dinner for Nell that he doesn't even realize she came into the room until he hears a stifled laugh coming from the other side of the kitchen. He turns to see what appears to be a highly amused Nell staring at him. Callen looks at her and shrugs his shoulders challenging her to speak.

"What, no apron for our resident cook?" Nell manages to sputter out in between her attempts to keep her laughter to a minimum. In response, Callen smirks and throws a towel at her head. This simple action causes both of them to burst into an easy, comfortable laughter. He returns to his place at the stove as he shakes his head.

"You mind getting some plates down or you gonna just laugh from the sidelines?" Nell shrugs as she moves across the kitchen and starts opening up cabinets to find the dishes they will need for dinner.

Working side by side with Callen in the kitchen is a pretty surreal scene. One she never thought she would experience if she is honest with herself. Truth be told, she is beginning to find herself more and more intrigue with one G. Callen as time went by.

She knows enough about him to know that Callen doesn't let people in. He doesn't trust anyone and from what she can gather he certainly doesn't let himself get close to anyone. Nell would assume that so many unanswered questions from his past have made him wary of bringing people into his life. She is pretty certain he has constructed walls around himself that are fortified with the highest security clearance needed for any kind of access and she is well aware she doesn't have the passcodes necessary.

The probability of becoming involved with him is so low that even Nell feels comfortable dancing around the subject. She knows that easy banter they have developed in recent months will not lead anywhere, thus keeping her out of danger. It's all harmless flirting that will never lead anywhere, so what's the harm? Double entendres can be a dangerous game if you put too much out on the table, but she always seems to know where to draw the line. They both seem to be enjoying the game, so she persists. No harm, no foul if you will.

Then last night happened; not to mention this morning. Now he is there with her on protection detail. He is there as Federal Agent G. Callen. She knows he is there under official capacity; not as himself. But he is there. A lot. She is worried about her resolve with him in close quarters so much.

It is much harder to separate the lines when he is so close all the time. It's getting more real as the hours tick by. All the things he doesn't even know about her. No one knows about her, not even Hetty. How could they when she has never spoke to anyone about them?

Nell is afraid. Obviously she is afraid because of the current events, but she is also afraid of the other things. She can't help but wonder if the circumstances from the past twenty four hours are making the game too dangerous. Some of the ways he looks at her. The feel of his arms holding her and his hands touching her have left her forgetting why she can't let him near her.

She is knows the difference between Agent G. Callen and Callen. She can see the difference. At least she thinks she can. The lines can get blurred easily and quickly. She knows she heard someone say that once and she wonders if her mind is just playing tricks on her.

How much of his interactions with her are simply designed to get her to open up so they can catch whoever this guy is? Is he getting too close? Now she is getting confused on where the line is and who she is dealing with at any given moment. Agent G. Callen or Callen, the man.

"Damnit!" She says aloud before she can stop herself.

Glancing over, seeing Nell holding the plates in her hands, Callen sees Nell lost in her thoughts once again. "Nell? What's on your mind?" She startles when he speaks and realizes he is staring at her.

"Nothing," she tries to sound casual, but realizes she is failing miserably. He watches her intently until she breaks his gaze with the spin of her heels. She leaves the kitchen to go set the table and he is left wondering what exactly happened.

They settle down at the table for the first meal Nell has been able to eat in almost a day. She catches Callen's eye as he begins to speak. "You ready to tell me where your thoughts were back in the kitchen?" Callen watches her reaction carefully completely falling into investigative mode.

"Nope. Some things are better left unsaid. Pandora's Box and all, ya know." Nell smiles at him as she goes back to eating her dinner. She definitely is not going there with him. They eat in silence for most of the meal.

Callen stores this conversation alongside the conversation earlier and makes another mental note to delve deeper when Nell gains some strength. He knows there is more to these comments than she is telling him, but he is also aware enough to realize she is too fragile to push right now.

The closer to the end of the meal they get, the more Nell starts to feel on edge. She catches irrational thoughts popping in her head and is now finding it hard to focus on anything else. She begins to shift uncomfortably in her seat as random thoughts start falling from her lips, "Are the doors and windows locked? There are other agents staying besides you, right? I mean staying outside, right?" She locks eyes with Callen as the fear takes hold.

Callen sees the look in her eyes and recognizes the panic washing over her. He quickly moves to the empty chair beside her and puts his arm around her shoulder. Hoping to lessen the panic attack by making her feel safe, he answers the questions she asked. He really doubts she is looking for answers, but the sound of his voice may be enough to soothe her.

"All the doors and windows are locked. There are several agents outside the house. Hetty has so many cameras around this place that no one can get near without us knowing." Looking at her, he realizes his words aren't registering. Her breathing is getting shallower and she is falling further into panic mode.

"Nell. Look at me." He cups her face in his hands as he is talking. "I need you to breath slowly for me. You're safe." He breathes in and out deeply a few times with her to try to slow her breathing pattern. It becomes apparent rather quickly that she is not calming down, so he tries another approach

As her body starts shaking, he lifts her up gently by the arms and leads her to the couch. Sometimes the motion and movement of walking can pull someone out of the panic and he figures it's worth trying. When they reach the couch, he sits her down beside him and talks softly her trying to reassure her that everything is safe.

He has seen panic attacks before. Hell, he's had panic attacks himself. He knows it's different for everyone. Some people can handle touch, while others will fall further into the abyss with touch. He isn't really sure which category Nell falls under, but she didn't react badly to his touch before so he takes the chance again.

He maneuvers his body so one leg is lying along the inside of the couch. He touches her arm softly and when she doesn't recoil he pull her closer to him. She looks over at him for the first time since he brought her over to the couch. The fear in her eyes overwhelms his senses and he instinctively pulls her against his chest. He wraps his arms around her and holds her securely against his chest. Callen finds his hands moving of their own will into her hair as he hears himself tell her, "You're safe now. No one is going to hurt you. I'm not going anywhere."

Her body tenses up initially, but after a minute he feels her relax into him. As he runs one hand soothingly through her hair, his other hand is rubbing small circles on her back. Her breathing is regulating and he knows the panic is subsiding. The knowledge that him holding her can calm her down and make her feel safe is amazing to him. It makes him feel so much more at ease as he navigates these waters with her; it is something he can definitely get used to.

Getting lost in the moment, he leans down and places a soft kiss on her head. He breathes in deeply taking the scent of shampoo with him as he realizes just how right this feels. It strikes him in that moment just how easy it would be to have her in his life. All the fears he has about relationships and being hurt disappear in that instant as he allows himself to think just how much he wants to pursue something with her.

Nell feels the soft kiss in her hair and immediately comes back to her senses. She had been so scared leading up to that moment. It was like this black abyss that sucked her in and she couldn't find a way out. She could felt her heart racing and her chest constricting. Then all of a sudden, she felt him. When he pulled her close to his chest, she knew she should run but didn't have the strength to break that hold. It just felt so safe and comforting.

Now, she is back in reality. Firmly. She pulls away from Callen abruptly. In a quick movement, she is off the couch and runs out of the room. She knows he will follow, but all she knows is that she has to get away from him. It's too much. She got lost in the moment, but she is well aware what she needs to do.

Callen kicks himself as he watches her run from the room. He now knows that knows kissing her on the head had been a bad idea; a really bad one. But he found himself so taken in by the feel of having her in his arms, he just couldn't help himself. Pulling his body from the couch, he goes down the hall towards the bedroom door.

"Nell?" He knocks on the door when he finds it locked. No response. "Nell, I'm sorry." Still no response. Taking a deep breath as he rubs his hand across his hair trying one last time, "Nell, please unlock the door. I just need to see that you're alright, and then you can stay away from me the rest of the night if that's what you want."

He hears nothing for minute and is getting ready to knock again when he hears the lock being turned on the handle. When he sees her open the door, he starts to speak but is interrupted by her voice. "I'm fine." Then she shuts and locks the door as quickly as she opened it.

She knows he wants more than that, but she simply does not trust herself at that point. Truth be told, when she lets herself get lost in him, she thinks she could want more too. It seems like it would possible to be with him. Like he would be different and she could actually trust him. Then she is reminded of everything and knows it can't happen.

Things got much more real than they should have and she sees no reason to put herself through anymore pain. That's what would happen in the end anyway, especially when he finds out about her past. The secret is too heavily buried and enough things in the past twenty four hours have threatened to push it to the forefront already. She is knows being close to him will only speed the process, especially if she is fooled into thinking he can be trusted. The feel of his arms wrapped around her already is blurring what she knows is the truth.

The logical side of her, the one that analyzes everything, knows that she is being unreasonable. Enough was said and done back then to cement the truth. She figures that he won't see it as she does. He wasn't there though. He doesn't know what she did to get to the present. All the words and actions of the past have solidified who played what role; he can't change that.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Notes – Not mine. **

** Here is the other part of chapter seven aptly filed under 7.5. Creative, huh!? It's not as long as the other chapters, but I am glad I split the two parts. I was able to go into much more detail by doing so. I hope you enjoy.**

** Thanks to everyone who is reading and commenting. I really am blown away by the response to this story and am happily moving forward with the plotline. I am currently ahead with this story by several chapters…just tweaking and correcting them as I go.**

** I also have two other stories in the beginning stages. Drug of Choice and Drop of a Hat. They are being written off the cuff and I am nowhere ahead with those. Kids return to school this week for a couple days, so that will help with ability to write!**

He is left standing there. For a moment he considers trying to get her to open the door again. Let him explain. Tell her why he did what he did. What he was thinking and feeling. It just seems wrong to leave things like this.

Honestly, he isn't so sure he could explain it though. Everything is so jumbled in his head and he can't get things to slow down enough for anything to be seen clearly. Obviously, he is responding so much more personally than he would if this was anyone else and he knows it's because of his ever evolving feeling for her. Never would he do these things with Kensi; not to the degree he is with her. He would worry and he would be there for her, but his entire focus is so stuck on Nell that he can't even concentrate on anything else.

He isn't used to things being so out of his control and that he pretty certain he may well go crazy. Callen had always heard people say love will find you when you least expect it. He also heard that when it happens, there will be nothing you can do about it. My God, is this what they mean? Unexpected? Check. Nothing he can do about it? Check. He has tried to pull back and he can't for the life of him figure out how to make that happen.

There are moments when he thinks that he can see something in her eyes. Like maybe she is connecting with him on a level that goes beyond the walls of the Mission. A level that goes beyond anything he ever thought he would be willing to consider. She lets him hold her and lets him be there to pull her back from the brink. Then as fast as those moments happen, she slips away. Correction, she pulls away.

Sighing heavily, he opts to walk away. Time for a distraction because he knows nothing will be solved standing outside her door wishing for answers. Callen goes into the living room retrieving his bag from its place by the couch and removes his laptop from work. He knows he won't be sleeping anytime soon, so he decides to sift through the information again. Maybe, just maybe, he will see something new. Settling in at the desk in the study, he gets to work.

Time passes much quicker than he had anticipated as he gets lost in studying the files. He checks his watch and sees it is after midnight. Frustrated with the lack of progress in finding a new lead, he closes out the files. He stands; stretching his back in the process in an attempt to relieve some of the tension. He leaves his laptop on the desk and walks to the back of the house.

After stopping briefly in the bathroom, he makes his way to her bedroom. He gently turns the handle and breathes a sigh of relief when it opens freely. Walking into the dark bedroom, he moves quietly over to the bed where he confirms she is sleeping. He covers her with the blankets and settles into the chair located in the corner of the room.

The light from the moon is shining into the room just enough for him to be able to see her silhouette. Callen knows enough about the process to be certain she will not sleep peacefully for long. He knows the nightmares will come and he intends on being there when they do. Leaning his head against the back of the chair, he settles in watching for signs of her subconscious replaying the events.

Round one happens sooner than he would have liked. Even though he isn't entirely certain when she had fallen asleep initially, he was hoping she could have at least slept for a good portion of the night before her mind transported her back in time. Sitting up straight, he watches silently as she begins to shift uncomfortably in the bed. Hoping she will be able to pull herself out of the film being played in her mind, he waits to see what happens. As Nell becomes more and more agitated in her sleep, it causes her to cry out at a phantom that he can't chase away.

Callen rises slowly and pads across the room coming to a stop by her side. He sits on the bed with her as he reaches out hoping to bring her out of the nightmare as gently as possible. It's a given she is going to startle and he knows that can't be helped, but he hopes his voice will at least be recognized somewhere in the depths as a safe haven for her to come towards.

"Nell. It's Callen. Wake up." He rubs her arm in slow circles as he speaks quietly. "It's alright, you're just dreaming." A couple rounds of reassurances and he realizes she is falling deeper into the nightmare as she starts thrashing more violently. He comes to the conclusion that the gentle method is failing. Miserably. Time for a different approach.

He speaks loudly this time hoping to startle her from sleep. "Nell! Wake up!" It works. Too well. In her nightmare induced haze, she screams at the same time she flies forward on the bed and her fist makes contact with his chest. He loses balance and falls to the ground. Hard. Quickly regaining his balance, he reclaims the place beside her on the bed and takes her shoulders firmly in his grasp. She is now looking at him. Sort of.

"Nell. It's Callen," he says a bit less forcefully. "You were having a nightmare." He waits for any sign that she is returning to reality. Waiting for her to come the rest of the way out of the haze, he rubs her arms hoping the contact will speed up the process. She breathes in deeply and exhales slowly. A few times.

"Hey," she says barely above a whisper. "How long have you been in here?"

Nodding in the direction of the chair, and then looking back at Nell as he responds, "It's actually quite comfortable." After seeing the confusion on her face, Callen takes an intake of air and explains, "I knew the nightmares were going to happen and I figured the closer I was the easier it would be to help you."

He is so matter of fact in his words that Nell accepts his answer without question. Aware there is no way he is going to willingly leave and lacking the presence of mind to argue, she lays back on the bed closing her eyes. She covers herself as he moves back to the chair and watches her once again.

Round two brings more thrashing as well as screaming that he can at least say was not brought on by his hands. He knows she is fighting off the man she encountered at the pub and he wished he could do more to help her. Once again, he is by her side to calm her. It is almost as difficult to bring her out of this round as it was the first, but he manages to do so without landing on the floor. She returns to bed after making a pit-stop at the bathroom. He returns to the chair.

Rounds three, four, and five are more about screaming. By the time she reaches the fifth interruption of sleep, he finds himself having to work harder at keeping his emotions in check as he struggles with the fear he sees replaying in her eyes. Damn this is going to be harder than he anticipated. He figures the same concept will apply this time around as well; calm her and return to the chair.

However, as he stands to return to his perch, he feels Nell grip his hand tightly. Looking back in her eyes, he sees the silent plea splay across her features. Setting aside his comfort, he settles for a spot on the floor next to her. She moves closer to the edge of the bed leaving her arm over the edge of the bed never letting go of him as she finds a comfortable position. He sees her breathing calm down as she falls asleep while holding his hand.

Several more rounds later and the nightmares are definitely winning. Any point of sleeping has been effectively eliminated from the equation as the nightmares are the predominant event of the night. The lack of sleep isn't a point of contention for him; the feeling that he can't do enough to eliminate the nightmares is a huge point of contention however. The sheer helplessness he has felt since all this happened is not a feeling he is used to and he decides it isn't one he is keen on repeating this frequently.

The number of reassurances he has offered softly to her has gone beyond a number that could readily be count and his original position of sitting on the chair waiting for the next round has given way to him lying in the bed with her. At some point, and he isn't really sure when, she quit wanting him very far away from her and apparently his hand securely in hers while sitting on the floor was too far. She holds one hand, but touches him in no other way.

That all changes with the next nightmare. They had been calming down and it had become just a simple touch at the beginning was all that was necessary to rouse her. But this one is different. It's like the first several on steroids. Nell begins thrashing with no warning and is yelling words he can't even make out. Before he even has time to react much, she sits straight up and screams in such a primal way it leaves him wondering where the hell her mind has taken her. It is very apparent she is nowhere near reality and it seems her mind has transported her somewhere other than the pub.

Callen moves quickly enveloping her in his arms from behind. In one quick motion, he crosses her arms across her own chest and holds onto her wrists pinning them firmly in place with his own hands. She struggles violently at first, but he holds her in place while whispering in her ear. "Shh…I've got you. It's Callen. You're gonna be fine."

After a few minutes of whispering into her ear, he feels her body start to relax. He loosens his grip on her arms and she shifts her body so her head is lying against his chest. He holds her there and runs a hand through her hair as he murmurs quiet reassurances once again. He feels her heartbeat slowing and her breathing regulating about the same time he feels the moisture on his shirt. Before he can react, she is pushing their bodies against the bed and they are settled flat against the soft surface with her head lying on his chest.

He lies there for a moment holding his breath wishing like hell it was any other night but this one. Her being in his arms feels so right, but he is unwilling to take advantage of the situation. Even if all they are doing is laying with each other. Not tonight; not in this moment. He shifts his body so he can move her onto the pillow she has been using. Feeling her tighten her grip on him, he looks down to see her shaking her head as she speaks, "Please, Callen." Her voice is barely above a whisper as she pleads with him, "Stay."

Nell is well aware of the pull to Callen even outside of the pure exhaustion she is currently feeling. If she had the ability to stop and think it through, he certainly would not be this close to her. She is certain of that. The problem is these damn nightmares. The frequency is so high; she can't catch a break to remind herself it's not real. The fear is too close and the images are far too real. All the feelings of everything that has happened keep coming back in such violent tidal waves it's like she can't breathe.

All she knows is right now, in this moment in time, Callen is the only link to reality she has. He is able to pull her from the violence and make her realize where she keeps falling is not where she belongs. As much as she tries to detach from him, she can't. It's like he is the light thrown into the storm by the lighthouse and his voice is the only beacon pulling her back to shore. She is certain without that beacon, she would drown.

The feel of Callen's arms around her makes her think maybe it could work. Maybe, the past doesn't matter. The ability he has to make her feel safe and quiet her nightmares has to mean something, right? She takes a breath in as she relaxes into the comfort of him and drifts slowly into sleep as her mind fills with pleasant thoughts of what could be. If only things were different.

Hearing her voice so broken makes him pause his actions. Looking past what he is sure will be seen as a lapse in judgment on her part come daylight; he convinces himself this is for her benefit. It's only half true really. He needs her as much as she needs him right then. He takes a breath and exhales slowly. "I'm not going anywhere. You're safe, Nell. Just close your eyes." As he holds her tightly against his chest, he feels her relax into him. Sleep finally comes. For both of them.


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Notes – Not mine…the only characters I can claim are Marcus and Ainsley…even though they really don't do much!**

** It occurred to me this story had not been updated for entirely too long. I was focusing so much on completing Drop of a Hat that I have been neglecting this one. I have to say it was great returning to this story and it felt much like coming home! This story has a special place in my heart and I am happy to have returned to it. **

** As with all my other chapters, please read and review. All comments are welcome!**

** I hope you are still enjoying this story as much as I am. **

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She wakes to sensory overload. For a second she is not entirely sure where she is or when she even fell asleep. Then she starts to remember. Dinner with Callen. Then panic. She remembers being scared and Callen talking to her. Leaving Callen and locking him out of the bedroom. Him in the room. Nightmares. A lot of nightmares. His touch calming her. In an instant, she realizes she is lying across Callen's chest with his arms wrapped loosely around her body.

She lets her senses take in her surroundings as she moves back slightly to get a peek at the man lying in bed with her. She can't believe she is here with him in such an intimate setting. Another surreal moment in time that she wishes she could hold on to and replicate.

It occurs to her that there have been so many touches over the last twenty-four hours that have made her re-think everything. She momentarily let herself believe in the fairy tale. The feel of his chest rising steadily beneath her head and the feel of his arms positioned across her back and waist. The notion that she could be safe in the arms of a man is completely ludicrous to her. Even if those arms belong to Callen.

Staring up at his face she realizes he is sleeping. The man who rarely sleeps is breathing in a steady pattern and very much asleep. It seems so out of character for him and she stops herself from analyzing it too deeply. Instead she chooses to take in his features and her breathe is momentarily taken from her as he realizes how at peace he looks.

Nell knows this has to stop. It will only lead to heartbreak and she isn't going there. Lesson learned on that point long ago. She strategically moves out of his embrace and quietly slips out of the room.

Taking a deep breath, he lies there with his eyes closed as the images play out in his mind. Dinner. Fear taking over. Moving to the couch and talking her down. The words I'm fine as she shuts the door. Sitting in the chair watching over her. Nightmares. Her pleading with him. Her against his chest safe in his arms. Suddenly, he wakes enough to realize she is no longer in bed with him.

He pulls himself out of the bed and walks out of the room looking for where she has disappeared to. Upon entering the living room, he hears clattering coming from the kitchen and the smell of food cooking. Callen assumes Nell is making herself breakfast and decides to take a quick shower while she is focused on her task.

She hears the shower turn on in the back of the house and moves quickly to make some additional food for Callen. Thinking it over Nell comes to the conclusion she isn't entirely sure what he eats at breakfast time aside from pastries. She opts for a duplicate of her plate. Everyone likes eggs and bacon she tells herself.

Coming around the corner and entering the kitchen, he watches her with a small smirk on his face. "What no apron?" He waits for her response and is amused when he sees the towel come towards him. They laugh easily.

She turns back around to get the plates of food while he pours some juice for them to drink. They meet in the dining room and sit down to eat. He watches her for a minute before he decides to speak; however, his voice is cut off by hers.

"Thanks." She barely looks at him when she speaks the words. He nods his head as he smiles softly. He starts to speak again when he hears the doorbell ring. He offers Nell a broad smile as he stands up from the table, "No need to say thanks."

With all the protection surrounding them he is pretty certain whoever is at the door is not going to harm them, but reaches for his weapon just to be cautious. He glances out the window by the door as he reaches for the locking mechanism. Upon seeing Kensi, Deeks, and Sam, he opens the door. Moving aside to allow them entrance, he calls out to let Nell know who is there.

Nell comes out of the dining room and smiles warmly at each team member. She feels how nervous they are in her presence and wishes there was an easy way to erase the discomfort. This whole ordeal is hard enough without everyone acting differently towards her. Walking over to the group, she stands close to Callen as she addresses them.

"So, how are things going? Any luck with the puzzle pieces?"

The team looks nervously at each other as they try to determine what information to share. No one wants to say the wrong thing. Before they can come to any conclusion Callen speaks, "There really isn't much yet. We are still trying to find where this guy is. We have a vehicle to watch for, but we are kinda stuck in limbo right now."

She nods her head, but silently questions in her mind what Callen is leaving out. He answered too quickly and the others look too nervous. She knows there is more to things than he is telling her.

"OK." She draws the word out giving everyone in the room the confirmation that she is not fooled by the basics. "Well I'm gonna go take a shower." Turning to Callen she inquires as to when he is leaving to go over things in the ops center. "I'm sure you have plenty to do there. You don't have to stay on my account, there are plenty of agents floating around that can keep an eye on me."

Tilting his head slightly to the side, he regards her carefully. As his eyes lock on hers he wonders whether it is smart to leave at this point. He hesitates as he answers, "Uhm, well. I guess if you are ok with me going in, then I can do that. Are you sure?"

"I'll be fine, Callen. I can catch up on some reading. There are a ton of books in the study." Excusing herself to take a shower, she smiles as she waves goodbye to the others.

Watching as she walks out of the room, he can't help but feel there is more going on in her head than she is letting on. Pushing the thoughts aside, he looks back at the others as he shrugs, "Guess you guys are stuck with me for the day."

"Wow G., less than twenty-four hours and she is tired of you being around. What'd you do man?" Sam is happy to be bantering with his partner after the way he left yesterday.

"Funny, she was fine til the doorbell rang. Maybe, it's more you than me?" A few comments from the others and he is ready to leave. He calls to Nell through the door letting her know they are on their way out and to call if she needs anything.

Hearing them leave, Nell starts putting her plan in action. She knows he would have to be gone in order for her to pull it off and it was a pleasant surprise when he went as willingly as he had. She finishes the shower quickly, but leaves the water running. After she gets dressed, she concludes it is now or never. She is going to find out exactly what Callen and the others are not telling her.

As the team pulls up to the Mission, Callen feels another wave of trepidation about leaving Nell at the house. He knows the agents who are there can protect her, but he would feel better if he was there personally. Callen also knows they need to make progress with this case and it will take all of their eyes to put all the pieces together.

Sweeping through the front doors, Callen sees Hetty across the room and greets her with a nod. He moves quickly and with purpose to the stairs leading to ops. Kensi, Deeks, and Sam follow closely behind their leader. Eric is already hard at work on organizing the evidence they have discovered.

"Morning guys. Wow, Callen you look much better than I expected you would. I figured you would look a lot worse. You seem to have slept. Did you?" Callen smiles as Eric rambles on nervously.

"Morning Eric. Yes, Nell is doing as good as can be expected. She slept a little last night, so that helped to some degree." He smiles at the analyst as he effectively answered all the questions Eric didn't ask. Callen already knew he was more interested in how Nell was doing than him.

"Anything new?" Callen addresses Eric as he sees him let out a breath he probably didn't even realize he was holding. He is hoping something may have come through overnight.

"Unfortunately, no. I put the van into the search parameters, as well as his face, but nothing so far. We will get a hit if either shows up anywhere near the bars Deeks narrowed the search to. I also put in Nell's home address and the pub she was in just in case he shows up at either of those locations. Right now, it's all about organizing what we have and hoping this guy slips up.

The ops center is a buzz of activity with people moving in and out of the doors frequently. It's all hands on deck with so many people trying to find the man who targeted one of their own. The team is reviewing the evidence and going through possible scenarios. They are also working with the LAPD to keep the four pubs under surveillance in the hopes they can catch a break.

A little over an hour later, they are all standing back looking at the big screen. They put all the information they have gathered up in order to see it from another perspective hoping something new will pop out at them. Their thoughts are interrupted by the sound of Callen's phone. Looking at the screen, he answers it quickly recognizing the number as belonging to the agent in charge of Nell's detail.

"This is Callen. What's up, Marcus?" He is trying not to jump to conclusions or sound too alarmed. The rest of team, recognizing the faltering in his voice that most would miss; all turn their eyes on him. Listening intently and watching for any non-verbals that could indicate a problem, they try to determine what is happening.

"She's gone. The shower was running and it was taking her a long time to come out of the bedroom. Ainsley went and checked. It's like she just vanished."

The color drains from Callen's face as he pockets his phone. In the same instant he is snapping his fingers to get Eric's attention. He had been oblivious to what was happening as he concentrated on sifting through more footage hoping to find something new. Turning around, he sees the team watching Callen and immediately tenses.

Just as Callen begins to bark orders, an audible gasp can be heard from the doorway of the ops center. Eric's voice is heard at the same instant everyone turns around to see the source of the sound. "Nell!"

Callen moves quickly to the doorway in an attempt to usher Nell back to the bullpen. As his hand closes around her wrist, she pulls hard enough to break his hold. Pushing his hand aside, she walks around him coming to rest in front of the big screen. She takes in all the images that are being displayed.

"Nell. C'mon, let's go downstairs." Callen is desperately trying to get her out of the room. It isn't the big screen so much that he is afraid of her seeing. There are some screenshots of her in the pub being grabbed by the suspect, but those are the least of the worries.

It's the images of the previous victims spread across the table in the middle of the ops room like a gruesome mosaic of sorts he is trying to avoid her catching sight of. He is all too aware they haven't shared this information with her yet and he certainly does not want her to find out this way. As if sensing Callen's concern, the team moves to form a human wall in front of the table.

"No." The word is firm and with purpose. "I have every right to see what you have found." She turns and looks Callen square in the eyes matching his gaze. "That is me on the screen in case you missed the memo."

Realizing two things at once, Callen moves to stand beside Nell. First, he notes how his team has effectively blocked her view of the previous victims. Second, he is pretty damn certain he will not be able to get her to leave anyway; at least, not until she sees some of the images for herself.

"Where are we, Eric?" She looks at her partner in crime and waits for his response. Upon seeing him look to Callen for guidance, she reminds Eric of her right to be involved. Callen nods so slightly, he almost misses the permission he is granted.

"Uhm, well. We have his name and the vehicle he drives, but not much else." Eric is completely unsure how to proceed from there. He says nothing else and hopes she is too distracted to push the envelope.

"That's it?" Nell is now looking Eric dead in the eyes. He is pretty sure she is reading his mind. He tries his best to hold her gaze in a weak attempt to assure her that is as far as they have got up to that point.

She moves slowly over to Eric's computer and then quickly shifts her gait landing her directly in front of the table. Her eyes fall to the images and reports spread across the table. No one expected Nell to move in that direction and they all try not to panic as Sam moves to block her view.

With one word from the small analyst, he freezes. "Don't." She doesn't even stop to look at him. Nell simply walks around him and straight to the table. At that moment, they all look to Callen for direction. A nod of his head in the direction of the door gives them all the information they need.

Deeks, Kensi, Sam, and Eric all file out of the room quickly and quietly. Sam gives Callen a strong squeeze on his shoulders as he passes him. It's almost as if Sam believes he can pass some his strength through that one touch. Reaching up and patting his hand showing he understands the unspoken, Callen nods his head as Sam passes. He is pretty sure he is going to need that strength too.

Nell moves slowly around the table moving pictures and skimming reports as she goes. He sees the color drain from her face as she pieces together the meaning of what exactly the images she is seeing are. She turns to face Callen and it appears as if she is going to speak, but then she bolts past Callen and out the door.

He catches her before she even makes it past the set of desks occupied by his team. As he soon as puts his hand on her shoulder, she recoils violently. She turns and shoves him hard into the desk before he has time to react, then resumes her retreat.

Nell runs from the desks and towards the locker room without looking back. As Callen gets back on his feet, he feels a hand against his chest with a voice attached to it saying, "I've got this." He registers the voice and watches helplessly as Kensi goes after Nell.

"G, let her talk to Nell." It's Sam's voice this time. Deeks knows enough in that moment to realize him speaking up will not reach Callen. He needs to the familiarity of his partner right then. "Kensi can handle it, man. Let them do the girl talk thing."

"Damnit! How the hell did she get past the agents on her detail?" Callen is now channeling his helplessness into anger at the agents who were supposed to be keeping her safe. He is well aware he is displacing, but doesn't much care right then.

"Well, she has developed some pretty impressive Hetty ninja skills." Deeks immediately regrets speaking when he receives a glare from the steely blue eyes of G. Callen. For a guy who isn't much to look at, he sure gives off the deadly vibe really well when he wants to.

Kensi reaches the locker room and sees Nell sitting on one the benches crying. She is crying softly enough that Kensi has to look twice to be sure what she sees. "Hey." Kensi speaks quietly as she sits next to her on the bench.

After looking away to wipe her eyes, Nell turns to face Kensi. "What is all that? Why didn't I know about previous victims? How could you guys keep that from me? It's pretty important, don't you think?"

Kensi realizes in that instant that Nell is more hurt than mad at this point. She takes a breath and thinks for a minute before speaking. "We were trying to let you process what had already happened. It seemed wrong to put more images in your head when you were still trying to piece together what happened to you." She says it in such a matter of fact manner that Nell knows she is telling the truth.

"Show me the files, Kensi. Let me see the pictures, read the reports. Maybe I will see something that you guys missed." Kensi hears the pleading in her voice. "I need to be doing something. I can't just sit at that house and do nothing." She recognizes Nell's need to be in control of something in this situation. So many things have been taken away from her and Kensi knows Nell function well when things are out of control.

After careful consideration, Kensi makes an executive decision that she is pretty certain Callen will be pissed to learn. She stands and holds a hand out for Nell to take. When she is standing, Kensi locks eyes with her. She needs to see Nell can handle this. "You ready?"

Nell stands up taller and pushes her shoulders back as if she is trying to exude a confidence that is clearly not present. She takes a deep intake of air and replies with a firm voice. "I'm ready." The two women exit the locker room in the direction of the ops center.

Callen is leaning on the edge of his desk rubbing his hands through his hair when he hears footsteps coming towards them. He stands quickly watching as Nell and Kensi approach the desks. Walking past Callen, Kensi stops to whisper something to Deeks. Seeing the look on his face, she simply nods.

Deeks is pretty sure his partner has lost her marbles. _"Take Nell to ops and go over the files from LAPD with her."_ He is positive he did not wake up today with a death wish. And that action will definitely get him issued one from their senior agent-in-charge. Locking his eyes with hers, he takes the nod as confirmation that he didn't hear her wrong.

As he walks Nell towards the stairwell, he braces for Callen's wrath. Except it doesn't come. Risking a glance back, he sees his partner with her hand on Callen's chest talking to him. Sam has moved beside her; proof he has Kensi's back. Unsure what exactly is being said, focuses his eyes on the ops center. He is figuring Kensi owes him free beer for a long period of time for this one.

Callen moves to walk past Kensi and feels her hand connect with his chest. "No, Callen. Nell needs to do this. She needs to see what we have up there." Her voice is steady and calm as she hopes to counter impending storm. Kensi doesn't miss Sam stand from his desk and move beside her in a show of solidarity.

Callen is now pissed and he wastes no time letting her know exactly what he thinks, "Are you kidding me right now?!" His voice takes on a low, steady tone that she recognizes instantly. She also concludes in that moment that she much prefers to be on the witnessing end of that voice as opposed to the receiving end.

"You weren't there yesterday, Kensi! You didn't see her go through a panic attack and struggle to breathe. You weren't there overnight. You didn't see all the nightmares she suffered through." He is trying his damndest to get her to understand why he knows this is a bad idea. "I was the one who saw her break over and over again. She isn't ready for those images to be added to what is already in her head. Damnit, Kensi. You had no right!"

Blues eyes have now locked with brown. She chooses her words deliberately hoping to end the conversation quickly. Getting her tone even and strong, she counters him, "She needs to be in control of something, Callen. That bastard took away her sense of security and her trust in her herself in one instant. You don't have the right to tell her she isn't ready. You most certainly don't have the right to choose for her. This is her way to get back some of that control."

"C'mon, G. You know she's right, man. You gotta put your feelings aside and think about it from her perspective. This is Nell we're talkin about here. She hates not being in control." Sam knows Kensi has the right idea, but he also realizes just how strong Callen's feeling are for Nell. He is hoping between the two of them, Callen can see this is a vital part of Nell's recovery; even if it causes more heartache initially.

Callen looks past the two agents at the stairwell leading to the ops center. Taking a deep breath, he watches as Kensi leaves to join Deeks and Nell. Eric had quietly returned to his computer terminal when Kensi blocked Callen's steps. He had figured it was safer in the ops center at that point.

He knows they are right, but Callen struggles with his overwhelming desire to hide her away from everything. Logically he knows she can't be protected from everything, but he wants to find some way to make it happen anyway. He looks back to Sam and nods slowly, "OK. Let's go."


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Note – Nope…not mine…never will be.**

** Here you guys go! I hope you enjoy. This story has been a fairly easy write so far and I am happy to say it is falling in line with how I envisioned it very well. I have a couple chapters after this one done as well as the final two chapters. Just have to fill in the rest of the middle! Definitely lots more to come.**

**Please be sure to leave feedback and let me know your thoughts. I do appreciate what all of you have to say and it has, on more than one occasion, added to or changed the course of what is happening. Thanks to everyone who has listed this story as their favorite or chosen to follow it. Also, a huge thank you to those who have me listed as a favorite author under their profile. I don't even know how to respond to that one!**

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Pulling into the driveway of the safe house, Callen and Nell exit the car in silence. It's the same silence that accompanied them the entire drive from the Mission. There isn't really a way to describe it, the silence isn't comfortable, and it's not uncomfortable either. It just is.

Walking to the door a touch ahead of Callen, Nell waits for him to unlock the door. Both walk over the threshold and move into the house. Nell goes into the bedroom to change into more comfortable clothes. Callen takes a seat in a chair in the corner of the living room.

It was one hell of a morning. They had spent the entire time in the ops center with Nell going over all the evidence. It was an eerie sight. She was completely detached and reacted like it was just another case. It was like nothing had happened.

The afternoon was much the same. She spent hours reviewing footage from cameras to see if she could spot something Eric had missed. Nell was certain she would come across something. Two eyes being better than one she had said on more than occasion. Of all the cases for that statement to be true, it had to be this one.

Callen was worried. Very worried. It was not 'normal' to have no reaction like that. He knew it. The team knew it. Watching her over the course of the morning, he had expected a reaction. Some sort of reaction. Sure she had bolted from the room initially, but then she came back with a resolve that shocked everyone. He was at a loss as to how to approach her.

She walks back into the living and stands behind the couch. Callen waits a moment to see if she is going to speak first. Deciding it isn't going to happen, he starts. Looking across the room at the young analyst who is staring intently at the floor, he speaks softly. "You good?"

Nell lifts her head to look at Callen. As soon as she makes eye contact, she runs from the room. Callen follows her path as she goes into the bathroom in the hall. He moves behind her as she throws up in the toilet. Rubbing small circles on her back, he waits for her to finish.

It occurs to him that he should feel bad that he isn't bothered by seeing her throw up. Truth be told, he is very happy she is. At least she is reacting. This display at least shows him that she is affected by what happened in ops today. He lets out a small breath of air and sits next to her as he leans against the tub.

"I'm sorry." Her words come soft and meek. She is starting to cry now. Nell doesn't do crying. She certainly doesn't react like this; throwing up and apologizing. It's not her. She is so overwhelmed by what is going on that she just wants him to hold her and make it go away.

She can't do that though. It's not an option. Nell knows how that story ends. She has played that game before. The whole care-about-someone-only-to-find-out-you-were-wrong game; she learns quickly. It only took a couple times playing to know it's not in the cards for her to be with someone.

Then there's that other thing. That cements the whole deal. After that, she knew what to do. She heard what was said and she knew what was done. That goes back to being a fast learner. At least that only took one lesson.

She lifts her body from the floor and walks out of the bathroom without another word. Callen is left sitting there completely dumbfounded. Sorry for what. There isn't anything to be sorry for. For being a smart and resourceful guy, he has never felt this clueless in his life. "Nell, wait." He realizes she is gone, but the words just wouldn't come out before that moment.

Callen finds her lying in the corner of the couch with her head on the arm rest. He sits down beside her and watches for a minute. "You have nothing to apologize for Nell. Why do think you do?" His voice betrays his confusion.

Nothing. She says nothing. Apparently they are back to that. Deciding it will be better to let her open up when she is ready, he slouches down a touch on the couch and rests his head on the back of it. Closing his eyes, he waits.

He thinks back through the day as he is lying against the couch. It was a day of no new leads. They aren't any closer to finding this guy than when this whole mess started. He reminds himself that it hasn't even been a full forty-eight hours yet. There is still time; there has to still be time he assures himself.

Callen lifts his head after spending way too much time waiting for Nell to open up. He knows today was hard on her, it had to have been hard on her. Hell, it was hard on him watching her throughout today. He also knows it is going to take time for her to comfortable enough to open up to him, but he is fighting the urge to push her on the subject for fear it will backfire.

He looks over at her small frame noting she is lying there seemingly asleep. As he studies her closer though he realizes this isn't actually the case. Callen silently tells himself he will try one last time and then give up for the night.

"Talk to me, Nell. Please." He is pleading now and he knows it. Callen is well aware of how many things have to be going through her head. For the life of him, he can't seem to figure out the one that seems to be causing her the most stress. She has alluded to it on more than one occasion, but he can't get her to elaborate.

"I'm clueless here, Nell. For the first time since I can remember, I can't even figure out how to fake it. I don't know how to help you. You have to talk to me, please." Locking his eyes onto her face, his voice lowers to almost a whisper, "You can trust me."

Nell is well aware of what Callen wants to hear. He wants to know everything. She realizes that she isn't making sense to him, but damnit she is making perfect sense to herself. That's all that matters anyway.

She risks a look at him and catches his eyes. They are filled with tears that are threatening to fall and she falters. Maybe he is safe. Maybe she can do this. He has always been there before, right? Never pushed her. Never made her second guess herself.

Nell takes a breath. A slow, deep breath. She wills herself to say something. Anything. Thinking back to last night when Callen's touch had been what finally allowed her to calm down during her panic attack. How him holding her in his arms made her finally sleep without nightmares. There are so many things she could start with that aren't that one place she just can't seem to go yet.

Callen sighs heavily and lifts his body from the couch. He moves to leave the room when he hears her voice barely above a whisper. "Please don't go, Callen. I'm trying to do this. I just…I don't know how." It's her voice pleading now. Her hand is holding his wrist as she urges him to sit down again.

He returns to the couch and gives her a minute to collect her thoughts. Callen is struck by just how scared she is in that moment. He can practically feel her fear. Moving closer to her side of the couch, he tentatively reaches for her hand. To his amazement, she allows the action.

Looking him directly in the eyes, she starts talking. "I have spent so long protecting myself. I don't know how to do anything else." She lets out a soft sigh as she continues, "Everyone thinks I'm this peppy girl that has no cares in the world. Amazing family. Good job; at least the fake one my family hears about."

She exhales deeply as she looks away from him. "It's all bullshit, Callen. Smokes and mirrors. I'm practically a genius, so I can create better than anyone. I haven't let anyone in since…"

Nell pauses here. He can see her re-thinking the words she is saying. Callen can literally feel her start to shut down again. Attempting to get her to continue, he gently squeezes her hand letting her know he is still there. "Since when, Nell?"

She shakes her head and starts to pull her hand away. Callen moves quickly to her side wrapping his arm around her shoulder pulling her close to him. Her head is now resting on his shoulder as he speaks softly, "the Nell I see. She is one of the strongest people I know. Amazing under pressure and ready to help anyone she can. She is quick with a one-liner and stands up for what she knows is right."

He hears Nell sniffle at the same time he feels the tears on his shirt. She lifts her head, but allows his arm to remain circled around her body. Shaking her head side to side, she smiles sadly while she talks. "If you really knew everything about me, then you wouldn't think that way at all. I don't even know the Nell you are describing. I was the girl who got set up with the guy as a joke. Make me think they cared and then I find out I'm the punch line."

"I learned quickly though. That's the thing about me. I'm a quick study. I avoided guys through the rest of high school and focused on graduation. When I got to college, I thought I could turn over a new leaf. All new people so no one knew the other me." She was sitting up now and his hand was holding hers tightly.

"I made friends, went to parties. It was always a good time. Always somewhere to be and something to celebrate. I finally felt like I belonged and I wasn't the butt of everyone's jokes. And then…" She returned her gaze to Callen's face. Attempting to read his reaction, she wondered if she could actually do this. Tell him about that night.

Then she lost her nerve. It was too much. In an instant, she felt panic. She didn't show outward signs, but everything inside screamed at her to stop. Every time she thought she could trust someone, it backfired. Her defenses were up before she could even stop them; an automatic firewall that had been created long ago for just these moments.

"Nell?" He can see the change. It's instantaneous and completely opposite of where they just were. She is so close to telling him, but she shut down before he could even react. The flash of panic is quick, but Callen knows it was there. She covered it with skills that rival his and he feels a sense of dread course through his body as his mind tries to fill in the blanks as to what happened to make her so afraid.

She stands up and moves away from the couch. "I'm done talking. No more. Not tonight." Nell hopes Callen accepts this line. She knows she needs to get out of there before he does something that makes her question the decision. "I'm going to take a shower."

Then she's gone. Just like that. As quickly as she opened up to him, she shut right back down. Watching her tonight made Callen feel so many things. Her emotions were so raw. He has never had an experience like this before; someone he cares about cleansing their demons like that. It feels amazing to know she is starting to trust him, but he also knows there is a long road ahead; for both of them.

Hearing the shower start, he moves into the study hoping to discover something about Nell that will help him during this process. Setting his cell phone on the desk, he opens his laptop for work and he pulls up her personnel file. Using the information he finds, he pulls up information about the college she attended. He cross-references crimes that happened during the time she attended trying to find some sort of lead.

Callen knows something happened to her back then. It's affecting her now and he is convinced this emotional rollercoaster she is on dates back much further than the last forty eight hours. He feels compelled to find out, even against his gut that tells him he should wait for her to tell him.

He is concentrating so hard that he doesn't even realize she is there until he hears her gasp. Damn her Hetty-like ninja skills. She is standing directly in view of the laptop. How the hell did he miss her coming in the room? He glances up at her and sees the anger emanating from her.

"You had no right! I can't believe you were looking into my background! That is my business, not yours or anyone else's!" She is more livid at him in that moment than she can ever remember being, even given the events of the day. She is yelling loudly at Callen and is completely beside herself as she realizes he would betray her like that.

"Nell, listen to me. I was just seeing if there was anything that might help us with the case. See if maybe this guy knew you somehow." Standing up he speaks calmly. Listening to his own words as he tries to convince her his snooping was for the good of the case, he knows deep-down it was for a much more personal reason.

Shutting his laptop screen with a loud thud, she is now completely invading his space as she pokes her finger directly into his chest. "Bullshit! You really think I'm going to buy that line? That is my private life and you have no right to go near it." Standing back slightly, she waits for his response.

Her reaction is so over the top that he knows she isn't going to listen to anything he has to say. He is genuinely surprised at the level of anger emitting from her. Irritation if she caught him he expected, but this way much more than irritation. Of course, he hadn't exactly planned on getting caught either. Callen makes a split-second decision; one for the good of the case he tells himself.

"I have every right, Nell. I'm a federal agent investigating a crime. I have to know all the details so I can proceed safely. If this were any other case, you would be the one digging into the pasts of everyone involved." He is well aware this line of thinking is going to go over like a lead balloon, but he convinces himself it is necessary. Crossing his arms firmly across his chest, Callen braces himself as he watches her anger boil over.

"I can't believe you pulled the agent card! Seriously, you are taking that angle?" Nell is completely livid now. The nerve it took for her to open up to him and this is what he does the minute he can get away from her.

"I should have never talked to you. I was actually starting to trust you. God, I'm such an idiot. I've been here before. Trusting a guy. Listening to the lies coming out of their mouth. Believing they were different." She is now close to tears.

He feels himself start to waiver when he sees the tears welling up in her eyes. It was a betrayal. He knows that deep down, but he is so worried about her. If this is what it takes to get to the truth, then so be it.

"Nell, this had to be done. We have to know everything. You know that." Callen is officially back to the playing the agent role. He is talking to her like she is just a means to an end. Whatever it takes to get the job done.

"NO, Callen! You should have just asked me. I would have told you anything that would have helped you with the case." Nell truly believes that's the truth. Of course, she would have said anything to help with the case. She is equally convinced that what happened before will not help the case, so it doesn't need to be talked about.

Callen catches onto her game of semantics. He calls her on it as he throws his hands up in the air. "I've tried talking to you, Nell. You shut down. Refuse to speak. Walk away. You won't talk to me about what the hell happened to you before all this. I know there is something. I also know it is relevant to this case, even if you can't or won't see that."

He sees a glimmer of something flash in her eyes and he is cautiously optimistic that maybe he has reached her again. Callen watches as she processes what he says. The ball is now in her corner. He can only hope she sees his perspective.

She invades his space once again so she is standing almost flush with his body. Looking deep into his eyes she speaks quietly, "I let myself slip believing you would be different. I was completely wrong though. You are just like him. Say all the right things and then betray my trust the first chance you can get. My mistake. It won't happen again." The coldness of her voice leaves him at a momentary loss as to how he should respond.

Before Callen can determine the next step, his phone rings causing him to jump slightly. He does not need a disruption. Not right now. It's like being in an interrogation room and being so close to getting the person to break only to have someone knock on the door.

Nell grabs his phone the second it becomes evident Callen has no intention of acknowledging it is ringing. "Callen is right here. Hang on a minute." If he hadn't been there watching her speak he is sure he would not have even recognized her voice.

She holds the phone out for him to take from her hands. Removing the device from her grasp, Callen practically yells into the receiver. "What!" He is still trying to process the last few minutes and he does not want to talk to anyone.

"Uhm, G. It's Sam. Was that Nell?" He is confused by the sound of the woman's voice who answered the phone. He knew it had to be Nell, but it sounded nothing like her. He also takes note of Callen's demeanor. It isn't hard to figure out something was happening in the moments before the interruption.

"What do you want Sam. I'm busy." Callen is clearly not in the mood for idle conversation and Sam instantly wishes he had some other choice than to call.

"Yea. Ok. We need you back at ops now. Kensi and Deeks are already on their way. Hetty is here waiting too. Eric got a hit on Herrold's van. It's at the pub where Nell was attacked." Sam knows they need all hands on deck for something of this magnitude.

"I'm on my way." Callen looks at Nell as he shuts his phone. She can tell something is happening just by the change in his demeanor. She has been there for too many missions to not catch the shift he makes when they have a game-changing lead.

"You stay here. Do not move from this house. I will have an agent be your shadow if need be. Do you understand me?" He is aware that she suspects something. Hell, she doesn't suspect anything; she knows there is a break in the case.

Nell, still highly pissed at Callen for everything he has done, stands her ground. There is no way in hell she is staying in this safe house while he gets told what break there is in _her_ case. She is going whether Callen likes it or not.

"I'm going with you. It's the only way you can make sure I don't bolt the minute you leave. Shadow or not, you know I can slip the agent." She crosses her arms and smiles wickedly at him.

"Damnit, Nell!" He knows she is right. She will show up in the ops center the first chance she can. He can't risk her making her way to the Mission on her own. Not again. The stakes are even higher now that they know he is looking for her.


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Notes – None of the characters from NCIS:LA are mine…unfortunately.**

** Another chapter up! Let me know what you all think. Read and review, please.**

** I have the next couple chapters already written and waiting to be edited, so there shouldn't be much wait time in between. I have been trying to finish one of my other stories up, but it keeps growing! Oh, well…it will end when it does I guess! Please check out Drug of Choice and Drop of a Hat as well if you want. **

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Walking quickly and with purpose through the automatic doors, Callen sees the team is already assembled. Coming around to the head of the table in the middle of the ops center, he addresses Eric first knowing he will have all the information they need to determine their next move. He doesn't miss the sideways glances as everyone notices Nell come in behind him.

"What do we know, Eric?" Callen is all business. Eric is as well. It's the auto-pilot that they all fall into when things get serious. The familiarity has the team less on edge than they have been for awhile.

"I got a hit on the van driven by Herrold about ten minutes ago. He is parked just down the street from the pub where Nell was attacked. Herrold exited the vehicle and went into the pub as soon as he parked." He glances over at Nell with those last few words as if trying to apologize for being so blunt.

"So this guy is in the pub." Callen speaks out loud, but everyone knows it's more to himself. He has a plan formulated in a matter of seconds and looks over to Hetty for clearance to move forward. With a nod of her head, Callen lays out the plan.

"Kensi and Deeks, you two will be inside the pub. Go in separate, I need you guys to be able to spread out and going in as a couple won't allow that. Sam and I will cover the front ready to follow if need be. Herrold may have seen me at Nell's house, so we can't risk me going in the pub."

"Eric, we need eyes all around that pub; inside as well as outside. Is there any way to access the internal cameras?" Callen knows it's a long shot, but figures maybe the tech has a trick up his sleeve that no one else knows about.

"I've got street cams out front. There is nothing around back or along the alley beside the pub. I have no way to access the cameras inside. It's just your run of the mill video camera which feeds into a recording device." Eric knows that everyone understands his limitations, but it is still frustrating for him.

"It's fine. We will set up a perimeter on the streets around the pub; block the guy in if he runs. This certainly isn't the first time we've had to fly blind." Callen isn't really worried about eyes inside because Kensi and Deeks will have that covered. It's the numerous escape routes outside that he is worried about covering.

Deeks speaks up next, "So this guy isn't going to just walk up the bar and sit. He's going to hang in the shadows trying to see if Nell is there. We're figuring he is there to try to grab her again, right?"

Looking around the table at the team, they all agree that Herrold is watching the place to see when Nell comes back. He wouldn't know her routine. He would have to start somewhere and since she hasn't been home, the pub is the only other option.

"So, how are we gonna draw him out. I mean Kensi doesn't exactly fit the profile this guy is going after." Deeks looks over at Callen as he speaks figuring he must have some idea that Deeks hadn't thought of.

Callen pauses as he considers the possibilities. "Hetty, do we have any agents that could pass for this guy's type?" It's a long shot, but he figures it's worth asking. Answering quickly enough to let Callen know it isn't possible; he knows she had already thought of using a decoy.

Before she has time to speak up, Nell's voice comes strong and loud from the background. It startles a couple of the team as they had been so wrapped up in the logistics; it seems they had forgotten she was in the room.

"Use me. I can go in there and draw him out, and then Kensi and Deeks can take him." She says it was such conviction that it shocks even her. She is standing now center stage trying to exude a confidence that she is certain isn't really there.

The response from Callen is quick and equally strong. "No, Nell that is not an option." He looks her in the eyes as he speaks, "We are not using you as bait."

Nell, still reeling from the argument that had been interrupted, strikes right back. "It isn't your call, Agent Callen." She draws that last part to show her irritation and it's not lost on him that she addressed him formally. He knows she is still pissed and, truth be told, so is he.

Looking at Hetty, Nell addresses her directly. "Hetty it makes the most sense to use me. Logistically speaking it is the only viable solution. He may not even show himself unless I'm there. The risk factor is low. Kensi and Deeks will have me covered inside. Sam and Agent Callen will be outside. I'll be fine."

Callen looks incredulously in the direction of Nell and then Hetty. Seeing Hetty's hesitation in responding to Nell's request makes him panic slightly at the thought she is seriously considering the proposition as a viable option.

Addressing Hetty first, Callen's emotions are faltering once again. "C'mon Hetty! You can't seriously be considering this; it's a bad idea. You know it and I know it. Hell, the team knows it. No way would we ever use the victim of a crime like this as bait. That's not how we operate."

Hetty is watching the exchange with deep fascination. What exactly is going on with these two? It's been on her mind in recent months, but this is a whole new level. She is aware the two of them have been dancing close to the line, but this shows strong evidence that line has been breached. At least by one of them, if not both.

"I can do this, Hetty." Nell has stop addressing or even acknowledging Callen and it is pissing him off immensely.

"GOD DAMNIT, NELL! You are not going in there! I have already gone against my better judgment more than once during this case and it isn't happening anymore." The team now joins Hetty in trying to determine the underlying tension that has been playing out over the last few minutes. Callen is pissed, Nell is pissed, the team is slightly confused, and Hetty seems…amused.

Hetty walks over to Nell and speaks calmly while addressing her, "Ms. Jones, you cannot go in there as bait. Mr. Callen is right. It's too dangerous. There are too many unanswered variables to insure your safety even with Ms. Blye and Mr. Deeks inside the pub. I won't risk your safety."

Callen feels a sea of relief wash over his body as he pulls out his phone to make a call. As he is putting his phone back in his pocket, he walks over to Nell. "You need to go back to the safe house. There is an agent waiting downstairs to escort you there. Stay inside." His words are calm and to the point.

Nell can't believe what she is hearing. Callen is kicking her out of ops. He is eliminating any bit of control she has left. She is livid. Beyond livid. Looking him dead in the eyes, the coldness from earlier making an appearance once again, she addresses him, "Whatever you say Agent Callen."

As she turns to leave, it becomes more and more apparent to Callen that the odds of being with her after all this are diminishing exponentially. His heart pulls at the thought of not being able to hold her in his arms again, but he knows that it's for the best. If he has to sacrifice the possibility of them to keep her safe, then he will do just that. He would rather have her alive and hate him then dead.

Taking a deep breath, he turns back to join the others making sure they are all on the same page. Satisfied the team is ready, they dismiss to gear up and get things moving. As he walks past Hetty he silently thanks her with the nod of his head.

Sam and Callen leave the Mission just after Kensi and Deeks. As they are driving to the location, Callen interrupts the silence. "Just say it, Sam." He already knows his partner has a million things to add to what happened. He's honestly surprised Sam hadn't just come out and said something.

"Say what, G? " He glances over at his partner, who is staring intently out the window. "That the tension in the room was beyond what was expected by anyone. The looks between you and Nell during that spat say there was much more going on than any of us knows about. Or how 'bout how she called you Agent Callen instead of addressing you how she normally would. You mean say something like that?"

"Yea. That about covers it." Callen is well aware Sam can read him pretty well. Sam also knows that Callen's feelings are clouding this case. A lot.

"How 'bout how this tension between you two is completely distracting for everyone. We all know what has to happen G, but damn…it makes me wonder if you can keep your head in this thing." Sam is worried. He is worried that Callen is going to lose focus. He is worried that Callen is going to endanger himself through this operation. Or worse, one of the team.

Callen didn't expect that. Sam has doubts that he can handle this mission. If Callen were honest with himself, he had doubts. Not doubts as to whether he can keep his head in the game. Doubts that if he got his hands on this guy, he wouldn't kill him on the spot.

"Fair enough, Sam. I'm fine though. Just keep this guy away from me and it will all be fine." Callen looks at his partner as he says the last sentence. He wants to make sure Sam sees how much that needs to happen. Not that Sam didn't already know that.

They hear Deeks' voice over the earwig talking, "I'm set. Don't see him at all yet. It's pretty crowded in here tonight though."

Kensi comes on next, "Over by the dance floor." She knows the drill. No need to expand or explain.

Kensi spends the next twenty minutes mixing and mingling with the crowd, as Deeks sits at the bar pretending to drink his beer. The tension is at an expected level and everyone is focused on catching this guy. Callen and Sam are watching from their vantage point ready to move at a moment's notice.

Then the game changes. It changes quickly and without warning. Eric comes over the earwig and everyone hears his words at the same time. "Uhm, guys. We may have a problem."

Before anyone has a chance to respond, Callen's voice is heard through the device. "What the hell is she doing here?"

"She? Who?" Deeks joins in the conversation trying not to draw attention to himself.

Callen is out of the car before Sam finds what he is moving towards. Quickly exiting his side and moving swiftly in front of Callen to block him from moving forward, Sam speaks. "G. Stop. You can't go in there, man. He probably knows your face. You are only going to put her in danger."

He's right. Sam is right. Callen doesn't like it at all, but he knows he is right. "Damnit!"

"Guys?" Kensi is trying to get a hold on what exactly is happening. Just as the word comes out of her mouth, she sees Nell walk in the pub. "Oh, that's not good," Kensi says in a low voice.

Deeks moves slowly away from bar to determine what everyone else already appears to know. Then he sees Nell too. "Shit, where did she come from?" Catching Kensi's eyes from across the room, he moves quickly across the floor to meet up with their unexpected guest.

"Hey babydoll. What brings you into a place like this?" He is trying his damndest to sound casual, but he is certain anyone that knows him can see right through the act. "How bout we dance sugar." He has his hand on the small of her back moving her toward the dance floor before she can do anything about it.

Nell is well aware they are all shocked to see her. Shocked, worried, and probably mad, but she knew there was no way she was going to sit at the safe house. Walking to the dance floor with Deeks, she is trying to find some reason to avoid the conversation with him.

Lucky for Deeks, by the time they reach the dance area the music has slowed down allowing him to draw her close to him while he talks. It makes things much easier and a lot less suspicious.

"What are you doing Nell?" He says it in an almost sing-song voice. "This is a bad idea." He pulls her away enough to catch her eyes.

"I am not about to sit at some safe house and wait to see if this guy grabs some other woman. You know I don't do well not being in control. This whole mess has taken the control away from me. I'm taking it back. Deeks, you gotta see that at least." She is trying to appeal to his sensitive side. The one that doesn't like to see people he cares about upset.

She knows that the words coming out of her mouth aren't entirely true. A small part of why Nell is doing this is because she wants some control; the bulk of it is because she is simply pissed. She is determined to show Callen that he doesn't get to swoop in and save her. He certainly doesn't get to break what trust she had in him, and then tell her to sit by and accept it.

Deeks fidgets and is clearly uncomfortable. She's good. He knew that already, but damn she is pushing all the right buttons now. Before he can speak, she looks at him speaking with the same amount of force used earlier, "I'm doing this Deeks. With or without your backup."

Then she walks away from him and goes towards the bar. Deeks stands there for a minute before finding Kensi's gaze. They don't need words to understand the stakes just got higher. He shakes his head side to side just enough for her to see it. Moving to the other side of the bar, he watches Nell. Watches and waits.

Sam has at least got Callen back in the car and watches as his partner fights to hold himself together. "It's done, G. All we can do is now is wait. Kensi and Deeks will keep her safe." Sam is almost convinced that is the truth. Although Nell is so off the charts right now, he is worried that she won't allow them to protect her as much as needed.

Callen has so many things going through his head. He feels physically nauseous. He knows that's because of his feelings for her. The overwhelming need to protect her is so powerful that it almost covers just how pissed off he is with her. She is putting herself directly in the line of fire and she knows it.

The worst part is Callen isn't even there. Once again, she is in danger and he is in a car waiting to get to her. He looks over at Sam and is seriously considering pulling the plug on the entire operation. It's not worth the risk. The odds of her getting hurt are too high.

They have only been sitting there for five minutes and the decision to prematurely end the operation is ripped from his hands. He hears Kensi first. Then Deeks. Then chaos breaks out over the earwigs.

Nell is waiting at the bar to order a drink. She is looking around nervously and has come to the conclusion that maybe she isn't cut out for this. It is becoming more apparent the further away from Deeks she gets that this was indeed a bad idea.

She turns to walk away from the bar deciding that she is going to leave when she feels a hand holding firmly onto her elbow. The grip is tight, but not unable to be broken. As she starts to react, the hand tightens to a painful level. Looking up she sees the owner of the hand and instantly freezes.

"Don't worry, you can trust me." She hears the voice but it sounds like she is in a tunnel. Her mind registers present-day, but flashes to the past. Fear ignites her reactions and she jerks free from his grip and runs as she hears chaos ensue somewhere around her.

Except she isn't running the right way. The fog over her body is so dense that she can't determine where she is. It's like she is in a dream where every step you take, the destination moves further away.

"Deeks! He's right there. He's got Nell!" Kensi moves quickly while pulling her gun from its holster.

Deeks reacts just as quickly moving towards the pair. His weapon is now trained in their direction as he hears himself break cover. "LAPD! Freeze!" The man shoves an unsuspecting couple off their stools into the direction of Deeks.

"Kensi, I can't get him! He's heading your way!" He sees her spring into action moving to go after Herrold as Deeks recovers from the collision caused by the couple. "I got him, Deeks!" Knowing Kensi is going after Herrold, Deeks focuses on finding Nell. Except he can't see her.

"Nell! Nell, where are you!" He runs in the direction she left hoping she knows something about the layout of the pub that he doesn't. It seems that she is headed toward a dead end.

Callen and Sam are out of the car with their weapons drawn the instant they hear Kensi's voice. Moving quickly toward the entrance, they order the patrons out of their way as they identify themselves as federal agents.

Kensi saw the man run to the side of the pub and took off after him, but he seems to have disappeared. Vanished. Looking around almost frantically, she realizes there is a side door that none of them had noticed.

Moving in the direction of the exit with her weapon trained in front of her, she calls into her earwig for Callen and Sam. "He's outside! There is a side door that he must have gone through. Go around the side!" She is through the door before the words even finish and looks quickly both directions before she chooses the left. Sam and Callen will come towards the right side of the alley when they come around the building so they will catch him if he goes that way.

Searching the side alley proves frustrating as she determines he isn't there at all. Activating her earwig, she lets the team know the bad news. "He's not here. Damnit, where the hell could he have gone. Sam? Callen? Deeks? Anything?"

Sam's voice is first. He and Callen had gone separate direction in an attempt to corner the guy. "Nothing here! Callen?"

"Nothing, Sam. Not a damn thing!" Callen tells Eric to have the backup cars canvas the area. Maybe they will get lucky.

"Deeks?" Kensi realizes her partner hasn't checked in since he went after Nell. "Deeks, did you find Nell?" No response. Meeting back out front with Sam and Callen, they all share a worried look.

Callen tries now, "Deeks?" Breaking the silence is Eric's voice. "We lost communication with Deeks. He's off the grid."

Shock takes over now as they process the possibilities in their heads. Callen speaks up, "Eric, what about Nell?" He waits what seems like an eternity for a response from the ops center.

"I don't know, Callen."


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Notes – I do not own any of the characters from NCIS: LA.**

** Enjoy! Please be sure to read and review. Let me know what your thoughts are and if you think the story is progressing in a way that makes sense.**

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Slamming the car into park, Sam and Callen jump out and run full force into the ops center. Kensi follows them closely matching their speed. They all have one thing on their minds. Find Deeks and Nell. They all know they will have access to more resources there than wondering aimlessly around the neighborhood where the pub was located.

"Eric, street cams." The words came out of Callen's mouth more as a bark than anything else. He is running on pure adrenaline and hopes like hell Deeks and Nell are together. The other possibilities are not ones he wants to entertain.

"I've been watching the cameras the whole time. There's nothing." Eric is looking frantically from screen to screen hoping to catch something.

"Deeks will protect her. He was right behind her when I went after Herrold. There's no way he would not have caught up with her." Kensi is talking aloud, but she seems to be trying to convince herself more than anyone else.

"DAMNIT! She should have never been there. Where the hell was her protection detail? How did she give them the slip again?" Callen is getting more concerned and frantic as the minutes tick away.

"It's Nell. That's how she keeps slipping her detail. It's like trying to keep track of Hetty." Sam has his hand on Callen's shoulder attempting to calm him down slightly.

"How long has it been since we lost contact with them?" Sam takes over the questioning as Callen works to calm himself down.

"It's been almost twenty-five minutes." The whole room feels the tension increase when Eric supplies the answer.

"Ok…let's talk this out guys." Kensi shifts into agent mode. "Going off the premise that Deeks found Nell and they got out of the pub. He would've laid low because there is no telling where this guy is. There is no way he would endanger Nell by trying to go after this guy on his own and he certainly would not have taken her with him to go after him."

Sam takes over, "Definitely right, Kensi. He could have lost his earwig in all the chaos when Nell ran and his phone could've gotten broke when he fell." Looking at Kensi for confirmation, Sam continues. "You said some people got knocked into him and he fell, right?"

"Yea, that happened right after he pulled his gun and identified himself," Kensi nodded in agreement as she reviewed the images in her head. "I went after Herrold and Deeks went after Nell. He was headed to the back as I went to the side door."

"Sam and I had the front and then fanned out to the sides," Callen has now joined the conversation after calming himself down significantly.

"Even if his phone was intact, he wouldn't necessarily stop to call us because that could put Nell in more danger. So, he is going to lay low until he thinks it's safe to come out. It's also possible…" Sam's voice is interrupted by the sound of the automatic doors of ops sliding open.

"Miss me guys!" Deeks strolls through the doors like nothing had just happened. The team immediately notices the blood running down the side of his face and the start of a black eye. They also notice that Nell is not with him.

"Deeks, where is Nell?" Callen jumps straight to the question he most wants answered. He realizes he should probably ask about Deeks' injuries, but he can only focus on her.

"Hey Callen! It's good man, really I'm fine. Just a little blood and I'm sure a bruise or two. Just another day at the office ya know!" Deeks is trying to lighten the mood, but fails to realize just how worried they all have been.

Callen steps menacingly towards him and Deeks backs up instinctively. "Sorry! She's fine. I think she went to the gym." He barely gets the words out as Callen rushes past him and flies down the stairs.

"Did he really think that I would have been this calm had Nell been somewhere else?" Deeks is confused because it seems crystal clear to him. He looks back in the direction of Callen's path and then to his partner.

"What happened out there Deeks? Eric lost you. It was like you disappeared." Kensi folds her arms across her chest and leans on the table waiting for an answer. And she has already determined it had better be a good explanation.

"Well, I went after Nell. She's a quick sprite, that one! It took me a few to catch up to her and by the time I did, we were nowhere near the pub. At least not close enough to just jump back over there." Deeks was blindly fingering the cut on his head as he was speaking.

"I thought you had Herrold, so when he cracked me upside the skull I was a little surprised. Took me a second and a couple blows to the body to figure out what was actually happening. Then out of the blue, the guy ran." Deeks was now actively picking at the cut.

Reaching up and smacking his hand like he was a child, Kensi glares at him as she speaks, "Stop picking, Deeks! Maybe he heard us coming? I followed him out of a door on the side of the pub. Sam and Callen went along either side of the pub, so maybe he caught sight of one of us."

"I have no idea. All I know is he took off and my options were chase him or protect Nell. Callen scares the hell out of me on a good day and, valuing my life, I figured Nell was the obvious choice. We found a hole in a fence and took off running."

Sam interrupts now, "What happened to your earwig. Your phone?" He figures it had something to do with the fight, but wanted to verify.

"Well, the thwack to the head fixed the earwig. Apparently they fall out easily when your head gets slammed abruptly by a hard object." Deeks shrugs as he is talking. "My phone was damaged at some point. I can't get it to do anything." Pulling his phone out of his pocket, he shrugs as he tosses it to Eric.

As if just making the connection that Callen left right as Deeks revealed where he thought Nell was in the building, he looks at Kensi suddenly. "Do you really think it's a good idea to leave Nell and Callen alone? I mean they had some serious tension going on there today, dontcha think?" His words are spoken with complete seriousness.

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Callen can't make it to the gym fast enough. The numbers of emotions flying through his body are too numerous to count. The overwhelming need to see her is superseding anything else he can think about. He runs through the door and sees her small form on the edge of the sparring mat.

Coming to an abrupt halt, he pauses for a moment before slowly walking towards her. He attempts to gauge his response. He knows she has been through a lot, but he even as much as tries to stop it he feels the anger welling up. It appears that physically seeing her and knowing she is fine has allowed the anger he had felt when she had shown up at the pub to return.

Standing just behind her, he tries to sound calm. "What were you thinking, Nell." He realizes his voice is tinged with much more anger than it should be and he doesn't trust himself to speak again yet, so he waits for a response.

Silence. Of course, why does that surprise him? I mean that seems to be the default response every time he tries to talk to her. Moving in front of her, he tries again. "Nell, what was that all about?"

Nell moves to walk around him and leave the gym. She doesn't want to do this with him. Not right now. She is still trying to process everything. Those words that man said. It all came back to her in that moment.

Callen reaches out to physically stop her and she immediately moves to avoid him. "You aren't getting out of this conversation, Nell. We are talking about this. Now." Nell is well aware how serious he is. What she also knows is she is equally adamant that this conversation is not happening. Not now. Not ever.

Realizing she is not going to have this conversation willingly, he resorts to a sure-fire method. She will probably hate him at the end, but he needs to get her talking. He starts out brash and loud hoping to make his point quickly.

"You had no right to be there. Hetty gave you a direct order and you disobeyed it. You put yourself and everyone else in danger. You don't have the training to be involved in an operation that dangerous." He watches her face and waits for the onslaught.

Adjusting her stance, hazel eyes lock with blue in a battle that will likely leave scars on both sides. "Dangerous? I'm a federal agent Callen." She issues the challenge and he is well aware he has to take it.

Matching her stance and squaring up his positioning, he answers, "Yes, you are a federal agent. You aren't a field agent though. The two things are completely different."

Giving a laugh that shows how ridiculous she finds his words, Nell counters. "We all have to complete the same training to become an agent. Or has it been so long you've forgotten that part of the process?" Her hands are now firmly crossed against her chest as she waits for his explanation.

"You aren't trained for hand-to-hand. There is a reason we do the sparring and extra training all the time. You don't have enough knowledge to fight like you need to be able to if you are working in the field." He knows she is aware of that point, but it seems she is adjusting reality to make her case for showing up out of the blue. Bracing himself for the next wave of the verbal barrage, he is taken aback at the turn of events.

Uncrossing her arms, Nell speaks. "Then show me." She is frustrated to say the least and is tired of everyone telling her she can't do things.

Stumbling on his words, Callen looks at her with confusion, "Show you?" He is not entirely sure what she expects him to show her. They were talking about hand-to-hand combat, but she can't be seriously expecting him to give her an impromptu lesson right there.

Weighing her options, Nell decides the old adage actions speak louder than words must have been invented for this moment in time. Shoving Callen hard, she repeats her previous words. "Show me."

Taken completely off-guard, Callen stumbles backwards. Taking a second to recover, he looks at her and speaks, "Nell, this isn't the time or…"

His words are interrupted by Nell whose anger is growing by the minute. "You say I can't fight like I need to and that puts me in danger, right? So show me how to fight."

Nell shoves Callen again and attempts to take a swing at him. He is now more on alert and easily dodges her punch. Trying to reason with her, he speaks calmly, "This isn't the time or place, Nell. It's been a long day for everyone. Let's just go back to the safe house."

Not interested in returning to the safe house with him at this point, Nell continues trying to bait him. Callen is now actively dodging her moves as she continues to insist that he should simply show her how to fight.

The longer Callen refuses to engage, the angrier Nell becomes. "NO! I am tired of you thinking you need to save me. I don't need anyone to save me, Callen." Her actions are becoming more erratic the angrier she gets.

The way he sees it, this exercise is getting ridiculous and it needs to end sooner rather than later. Callen has avoided physically restraining her. Until now. Enough is enough.

Callen moves swiftly encasing her in his arms as he pulls her close to his chest. He knows that if he can just get her to calm down, then they can talk. And least that is what he was thinking.

She responds quickly and quite violently. Feeling herself being restrained brings back a flood of memories that she has long since buried. Nell fights like she has never fought before as she sends a flurry of jabs and punches in Callen's direction and she simultaneously shifts her body nonstop.

Struggling to hold onto her, Callen realizes too late just how wrong his assumption was. She is yelling repeatedly for him to stop and leave her alone. He is struck by just how strong she is when cornered. Not that he really wanted to be the one to discover this trait.

Breaking free from his grasp and moving quickly out of reach, Nell looks at Callen with eyes that tell him she isn't really seeing him. He sees her body shaking and starts putting the pieces together. Putting his hands up at either side of his head, he starts to speak but is interrupted by her voice.

"Don't touch me! Don't ever touch me like that again! Do you hear me!?" As if waking up for the first time since she broke free from his grasp, she shakes her head quickly from side to side. "I don't need you to save me, Agent Callen. I don't _want_ you to save me. Just leave me alone."

Nell turns around quickly and moves towards the door leading into the gym. Callen reaches out for her as she goes to leave and is greeted with a fist to his jaw. Recovering from the unexpected hit, he yells her name in an attempt to get her to turn around as she flies out of the gym. He takes off after her, but is stopped by Hetty's voice.

"Mr. Callen. May I have a word with you please?" Stopping and taking an exasperated intake of air, he turns to meet her gaze.

"Hetty. Now isn't really a good time. Nell is…" His words are interrupted by Hetty's voice as she insists he meet with her immediately.

"Now is the perfect time, Mr. Callen. Nell will be fine. She has Kensi watching her every move. I am sure we will hear about it if Nell does anything requiring our help." Trying to come up with some reason this meeting has to happen right now, Callen is at a loss as to what is so damn important it can't wait.

Knowing he has no choice, Callen reluctantly moves to follow Hetty down the hallway. Settling for a corner far enough away from anyone else, Hetty turns to face Callen.

"It appears our young Ms. Jones got a pretty decent hit in there. Are you alright, Mr. Callen?" Hetty's eyes are focused on the slight swelling that is becoming evident along Callen's jaw. He can see a slight glean of amusement in her eyes as she waits for an answer.

Reaching up to rub his hand along the injury, he finds it a bit more tender than he would have expected. "Yes, Nell got a good hit in there and I'm fine. I highly doubt that is why you wanted to talk to me though."

Nodding her head slowly, she confirms his thought process. "Indeed Mr. Callen, there is something else I intend on discussing with you." She watches him intently as if trying to read his thoughts and frankly he just isn't really interested in being psychoanalyzed right then.

Loosing his battle at staying patient, Callen speaks. "What is it you wanted to discuss with me? You know there is a lot going on at this particular moment." He crosses his arms across his chest as he waits.

Taking a breath, she hopes to get her point across without having to issue an order she doubts will be followed anyway. "It seems Ms. Jones is having quite a difficult time right now with everything happening. And while she needs her friends surrounding her, it appears that you may well be causing a bit more harm than good at the present time." Watching him carefully she knows her message isn't going to be received well.

Straightening his stance to his full height as his mind catches up to what she is saying, Callen is momentarily stunned into silence before finding his voice again. "Are you telling me to stay away from her? As in let her calm down before I go back to the safe house for the night? Because I sure as hell hope you don't expect me to stay away for the entire night."

Giving herself a moment before answering, she chooses her words carefully. "I do indeed mean stay away for the night Mr. Callen. It's late. Nell needs sleep. You need what little sleep you ever seem to get. And this tension needs time to dissipate. Start fresh tomorrow."

With the final words having been spoken, Hetty turns leaving Callen slightly dumbfounded. Even though she stopped short of issuing a direct order, he knows very well he is expected to obey. Throwing a wild fist into the air at nothing in particular and yelling aloud, "Damnit!"

Sliding his body against the wall and allowing himself to fall to the ground, Callen sits with his head in between his legs as he wills himself to calm down. After several minutes, he reaches into his pocket and retrieves his phone. Opening it, he sends a text to Nell hoping that his actions before caused fewer traumas than he thinks they did. Putting his phone back in his pocket, he picks himself up and walks down the hall hoping Nell is alright.


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Notes – None of the characters from NCIS: LA are mine. Never will be.**

**Here you guys go! Next chapter is up. I am officially caught up on the chapters that were already written and just needing proofread. I am working on filling in the middle chapters as I already have the last two written. Not sure how typical that is, but they just came to me and I went with it!**

**Enjoy and please give feedback! Thanks to everyone who is following this story and has it on alert. It's kind of my baby as it is the first one I started writing. I completed Drop of a Hat and recently updated Drug of Choice if anyone is interested in checking those out!**

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Crossing the threshold into the safe house, Nell walks straight to the couch and deposits her body into the soft frame. Kensi walks around to the other side and joins her. Staring at nothing in particular, Nell replays the night's events in her head.

She knew that man at the pub. Nell feels sick to her stomach as she allows her mind acknowledge him. The one person she fought to eradicate from her psyche just walked right back into her life and his presence sends everything into a tailspin. How did he even find her? The odds are astronomical at best that he would have just happened upon her in that pub.

Her thoughts are disrupted by Kensi's quiet voice, "I'm gonna get something to eat. Do you want anything in particular?" Kensi gives her a look that says she had better stay put. Her bad habit of disappearing has everyone on edge as they fight to keep her safe.

"Don't worry Kensi. I'm not going anywhere." Her voice is so dull Kensi would have never even recognized it as belonging to Nell if she had not been looking right at her as she spoke. Walking into the kitchen, Kensi knows it's going to be a long night even if there are only a few hours left before morning breaks. Hetty already told her that she was ordering Callen to stay away for the night. Kensi honestly wasn't sure whether that is a good or bad thing.

Throwing together a couple of sandwiches, Kensi returns to see Nell in the exact same position as she left her. Handing one of the plates to Nell, she encourages her to at least eat a couple of bites. They sit in silence eating for a couple minutes when Nell's phone interrupts.

Looking at the screen, she sees Callen's name. Kensi watches her reaction as she opens the text and sees a flash of something she can't quite read go across Nell's features. "Nell. Are you alright?" Getting no response, she leans in closer and speaks again. "Who is the text from Nell?"

As if just comprehending Kensi is speaking, Nell turns towards her and nods her head in response to the first question. "I'm fine, Kensi. It's Callen."

Kensi gives her a look of disbelief and questions her again. "Nell. Are you sure you're ok? You didn't look so good when you read the text." She is getting a bit more worried. Nell's responses seem to coming in slow motion.

Handing her phone to Kensi, she reiterates that she is fine. "Go ahead and read it. It really is from Callen." Pushing aside the feeling that she is crossing the line just a bit, Kensi glances at the text. She tries to keep in mind everything she is doing is just to make sure Nell is safe. The last thing they need is Herrold finding some way to get in touch with her. _Just wanted to say I'm sorry. Hetty all but ordered me to stay away for the night. I will see you first thing in the morning._

Kensi hands Nell's phone back to her and then suggests they try to get some sleep. While she realizes Nell has been giving the slip to those assigned protect her, Kensi also knows Nell doesn't appreciate people always around her. Locking eyes with her, Kensi speaks firmly.

"We both need to get some sleep, but I also need to make sure you aren't going to try to go anywhere again." Waiting for a second, Kensi continues. "Hetty ordered more agents around the perimeter and told me to not let you out of my sight. I know you won't appreciate me staring you down for the next few hours, so I need you to promise me you will not try to leave."

Nell looks at Kensi and nods her head. "I don't have any reason to leave. The only reason I left before is because I knew I was the one person who could get him to come out of the shadows." Nell gives Kensi a look of confusion as if to say that should already have been clear and she should not have needed to clarify why she slipped the agents earlier.

Shaking her head, Kensi repeats her request. "Nell, I want a promise from you. If you want to go somewhere you need to tell me, and then we will see if it can happen. But you need to promise me you won't leave this house without me." She is now holding Nell's hands in an attempt to make sure she is really listening to her. Nell has been so distant since they left the Mission and Kensi is worried about what is going on in her head.

Squeezing Kensi hands, Nell gives a small smile. "I promise I won't leave the house without you Kensi. I swear to you, I have no reason to leave now. Go ahead and get some sleep; you look exhausted." Kensi nods her head and stands up to move to the back of the house.

Reaching the hallway, Kensi looks back at Nell and questions her. "What about you Nell. It's been a really long day for you too." Knowing it won't do her any good to argue with her, Nell rises to her feet and walks past her going into the bedroom. She gives a smile to Kensi as she closes the door.

Kensi moves to the other bedroom and prepares for bed. After finishing her evening routine and getting in bed, she pulls out her phone and sends a quick text to Callen knowing he has to be more on edge not being with Nell. Even though they were obviously fighting earlier, she knows how much he has come to feel responsible for Nell. _Just wanted to let you know Nell is doing alright. She is laying down now. See you in the morning._

Just as he reaches his destination, Callen hears his phone alert him to an incoming text message. Picking his phone up, he sees Kensi's name and panics momentarily. Opening the text quickly, he breathes a sigh of relief as he reads the content. Settling back against the seat of his car, Callen watches the entrance to the safe house. He knows there is no way he is going to get any sleep in the last few hours of the night, so why bother trying.

After taking a shower and getting ready for bed, Nell passes through the living room on her way to the kitchen. Making herself a cup of tea, she settles herself into the corner of the couch and sips it slowly. Her head is spinning and she is trying desperately to make sense of the latest discovery.

She knows she should tell the team. Explain what happened. She just isn't sure she can talk about something that doesn't even make sense to her. When they danced at the pub, she hadn't recognized him. How is that? She should have known.

Replaying the events at the pub, she tries to remember every detail. Slipping firmly into analyst mode, she goes into the study. Retrieving a pad of paper from one of the drawers, she begins listing everything she can remember about him. Even if the memory seems wrong or irrelevant, she keeps writing.

Sitting back in the chair, she takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. Attempting relax her mind, she lets herself access files in her psyche that she had long since sworn would never be touched. As if on autopilot, Nell reaches for the pen and begins writing once again. She lists everything she remembers about that night all those years ago.

After she finishes her list of memories, she gives herself a moment to breathe. She has never spoken about that night, let alone written it all out. Nell never reported what happened. She decided all those years ago that she just wanted to forget. Everything that happened that night was filed away in her mind and the only other person who knew was him. His version was much different from hers however; of that she was certain.

Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she placed that lists next to each other and compared them. She was still trying to figure out how she could have spent so many hours with him that night, but not recognize him at the pub. Even with the obvious differences like change in hair and weight change being eliminated, it still makes no sense why she didn't recognize him. If nothing else, she should have keyed in on his voice.

Growing more frustrated as the minutes turn into hours and realizing she is getting nowhere, Nell slams the palm of her hand on the top of the desk. "Damnit!" Looking out the window, she sees the sun is rising. Taking the papers in her hand, she places them in her pocket for safe keeping until she can dispose of them.

Locking the computer down, she moves from the study into the kitchen and searches for something to fix for breakfast. Realizing she isn't entirely sure what Kensi might like for breakfast, Nell opts to make a few different things. Setting to work, she has breakfast ready by the time Kensi makes her way to the front of the house. "Hey Nell. Were you bored or something?" She is a little surprised by the amount of food she sees in the kitchen.

Shrugging her shoulders, she hands a plate of food to Kensi. "I wasn't sure what you would like so I made a few things. Callen said he is stopping by this morning too, so I figure he will probably eat as well." Gathering a plate for herself, Nell joins Kensi at the table.

Kensi takes the opportunity to watch Nell. She looks tired and Kensi has her doubts as to whether or not she slept at all. If she were betting, the answer would be not at all. She also makes a mental note that Nell really isn't eating anything; just pushing the food around her plate. "Not hungry?"

Again, Nell simply shrugs. Giving her a few minutes, Kensi speaks softly to her friend. "Did you get any sleep last night? You look exhausted." Knowing she won't fool Kensi, Nell shakes her head. "You really should try to get some rest today." Upon hearing the words, Nell picks up her plate and moves it to the counter.

Nell goes into the bedroom to change her clothes when she hears the front door open and close. Hearing Callen's voice, she takes a deep breath. She isn't mad at him anymore and would prefer to just forget the fact that they were fighting. Walking out of the bedroom, she hopes that Callen will just let the last several hours stay in the past.

Walking through the living room, Callen is hit with the smell of breakfast food. Looking around as he walks towards the kitchen, no one appears to be around. Reaching the dining room, he sees Kensi with a plate of food and gives her a confused look. Seeing her team leader's expression, she explains. "Nell cooked. She said to help yourself when you got here." Nodding his head, he gets a plate of food.

Joining Kensi at the table, he inquires about the plate of food on the counter. "Did Nell eat anything?" He knows she didn't eat much yesterday either and is beginning to think they are going to have to force feed her before this is all said and done. Shaking her head Kensi takes another bite of food before speaking.

"She also didn't sleep as far as I can tell." He immediately gives her a pointed look that shows his irritation as he realizes Kensi didn't have eyes on her at all times; especially in light of her propensity to escape. Matching his gaze, she explains her decision, "You know as well as I do that there is no way Nell would have let me stay on top of her. She made me a promise that she would either stay put or get me if she wanted to go somewhere."

Callen softens his gaze knowing Kensi is right. Nell is having enough issues being forced to stay in the safe house. He also has to concede knowing how good Kensi is at her job and that she would never do anything to put Nell in danger. He trusts her judgment. "I'm sorry Kens. This whole thing has me completely on edge."

She smiles softly at her normally fearless leader wondering when exactly he fell this hard for Nell. "You aren't the only one who cares about her, you know. We're all worried." Taking a minute before finishing, she gives him some advice. "She needs you here as a friend, Callen. If you don't want to push her away, then you have to let her lead. No questions about what she was thinking yesterday; just let her talk when she is ready and listen when she does." Knowing he will process her words more effectively without an audience, she picks up her plate and moves to the kitchen to clean up.

Letting her words sink in, he knows she is once again right. He picks up his dishes and moves to the kitchen to join her. The comfortable silence is interrupted by the sound of the piano. Locking eyes with Callen, Kensi gives him a questioning look.

"Nell plays. I'm guessing Hetty knew that somehow because I don't remember a piano being in this house before." Letting the melody fill her mind, Kensi finishes washing the extra dishes and then looks at her watch.

"I have to go. I am guessing you are staying with her for the day. We will call if anything changes or we find something substantial. Remember to just follow her lead." Callen nods at his friend and watches her leave the kitchen. He finishes wiping down the counters and goes into the living room in time to see Kensi give Nell a soft pat on the back on her way to the door. Turning and seeing Callen, she waves goodbye.

Callen stands by the piano as he listens to the music filter through the room. After a second, he sees Nell shift over on the piano bench and he takes that as an invitation. He takes a seat next to her. Callen remembers the last time he sat on the bench with her and opts for the same degree of silence knowing the music will work its magic on her soul.

He is struck by how haunting the music sounds. Callen really wishes he knew what the song was that she is playing. As if she can read his mind, Nell begins to sing softly. Momentarily stunned by the sound of her voice, he recovers quickly as he listens to the words. He realizes just how intimate the words are as she continues with the song and Callen thanks his lucky stars Nell is willing to let him see this side of her. He remains captivated throughout the song as she tells a story through music that she seems unable to speak with words.

She finishes the song and takes a moment to just stare at her hands as they remain motionless on the keys. Callen freezes as well not wanting to disrupt the thoughts going through her head. Nell takes a deep breath and looks at Callen. "Can you come somewhere with me?"

Giving her a look of slight confusion, he poses his own question. "Where do you want to go?" He hadn't expected her to want to leave the house at all today, except maybe to go into the Mission. Without responding to his question, she stands and offers a hand to Callen.

"I just need to get out of here for a bit. Do you mind if I drive your car?" She follows Callen's face as he stands to join her and can see that he is worried about her. Hell, she is worried about herself. She is hoping a drive will let her mind clear a little and make things easier to process. She is still trying to piece together how she didn't recognize that man.

"Sure. As long as your driving skills are better than Kensi's, I'm good." She laughs just a little at his dig at Kensi and he gives her a smile in return. He is trying very hard to not ask questions or push her about how she is doing. That song she sang was so powerful. He knows she is fighting a lot of demons right now and he just wishes he knew how to help her. He mentally reminds himself of Kensi's advice and squeezes Nell's hand before letting it drop.

"Do you need anything else before we leave?" She shakes her head and he takes the lead as they exit through the front door. Letting Nell know the car is unlocked, Callen also lets her know he will be right there. He finds the lead agent standing just outside the house and instructs her to keep a watch on the house and call Sam if anything happens. Next he sends a text to Kensi. _Nell needed a break from the scenery, so we are going on a road trip. Not sure where to yet. Call if you need me._

Arriving at the Mission after having stopped home for a change of clothes, Kensi hears her phone just as she sets her stuff by her desk. Looking at the text, she lets a smile fall across her features. "Good news?" She jumps slightly not having realized Deeks was there. Handing her phone to Deeks so he can read the message, she tells him about her conversation with Callen before she left the safe house. "Road trips can be good to clear your head. Can't hurt at this point, right?" Kensi simply shrugs a response not entirely sure what to think anymore.


	14. Chapter 14

**Author's Notes – Not mine. I have no claim to the character of NCIS: LA.**

** I want to apologize for taking so long to update this story. I really have not forgotten about it. I ran into some serious writer's block and have really fought to get this chapter to a level that I find acceptable. I got about three pages in and ended up starting over because it just seemed too forced. In the end, I opted to combine my first and second attempts to create this chapter. **

** I hope you all enjoy. I will be working over the next several days to get the next couple chapters down so there isn't as long of a break between the next few chapters. Please read and review! **

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Pulling onto the highway, the car is silent with the exception of the low hum motor is making. Not entirely sure talking is the right course of action; Callen reaches forward to turn on the radio in an attempt to fill the silence. He stops when he feels Nell's hand over his and looks in her direction. She never takes her eyes off the road; only gives his hand a gentle squeeze. Figuring she isn't interested in music at the moment, he pulls his hand back. Nell lets go of his hand and he hears her take a deep breath as he is turns to look out the window.

After several minutes, Callen gives a glance in her direction and speaks softly. "We going anywhere in particular?" He watches as she contemplates the question, but doesn't push for an answer. It's been a long few days and they are both pretty spent; emotionally and mentally. Callen thinks back to Kensi's words and decides to just let the car fall into silence until Nell is ready to break it.

She fights to keep her emotions in check as she struggles to keep quiet despite the fact that just about every fiber of her being is screaming at her to just give in. The thought of putting everything out there makes her physically sick to her stomach, but Nell also knows she owes the team some sort of explanation. Hell, she owes Callen an explanation if nothing else. She thinks back to the list she made earlier and contemplates whether to just hand it to him. That would eliminate the need to speak and Nell considers whether she could convince her brain she never shared those details.

The more she thinks about what her next move should be, the more anxious she becomes. As if just breaking from a trance, she notices Callen is watching her closely. Nell realizes as she pulls into the parking lot that she must have been on auto-pilot because she has no memory of how she ended up driving to this location or why. Putting the car into park, she leans her head into the steering wheel as she wills herself to calm down.

Callen is most definitely confused by their destination. He looks around at the buildings before looking at Nell. Seeing her leaning against his steering wheel, he silently questions how to proceed. Needing some sort of direction, he gently places his hand on Nell's shoulder and immediately regrets his decision as she jumps at his touch.

In one swift move, Nell's hand shoves his away and she quickly gets out of the car. He mentally chastises himself as he retrieves the keys from the ignition and gets out to join her. Locking the car, he walks over to where she is standing in the grass. He waits as she regains her composure and approaches her only when he is certain she has calmed down.

Opting to stand at arm's length, Callen finds himself at a loss for words. He doesn't know what to say or hell what to even do. It's like every move he makes is wrong and all his intentions are misread. Deciding it is probably better to just let her come to him, he finds a spot under a nearby tree and sits down to wait.

He knows there is some sort of link between Herrold and Nell, but he can't get her to talk about the connection. Callen is guessing he was on the right track when he was trying to look into her past. She had such a strong reaction that Callen knows he hit a nerve. Frustrated with his lack of competence in regards to the situation, he leans his head back against the tree and tries to steady his breathing. The last thing Nell needs is seeing Callen frustrated.

Out of nowhere, he hears Nell speaking. Afraid to look at her and risk making her uncomfortable, he simply looks down at the blades of grass as he listens. "I have no idea how to do this. Geez, I'm not entirely sure why we even ended up here. It's like my body was on auto-pilot because I can't even remember the drive from the safe house to where we are." She drops her body on the ground near Callen and lets out a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry you got dragged into all this."

The motion of Callen's hand pulling the blades of grass comes to an abrupt stop as he hears her apology. Trying not to jump straight to frustration, he rubs his free hand through his hair before speaking. "You have nothing to apologize for Nell. Nothing at all." He is struggling to keep his voice even as she makes it sound like it is some chore for him to be here with her. He can't imagine being anywhere else.

Looking over in her direction, he sees her eyes fixed at something in the distance. Callen leans towards her small frame as he tries to find the right words for this moment. "Nell, look at me." He sees her struggle with the request, but he doesn't let that sway him. It is imperative that she understand why he is there and how important it is to him that she knows he is here for her no matter how long it takes. Tentatively reaching out he touches her arm in an attempt to gain her attention. "Please, I need you to look at me."

She turns her body and slowly complies with his request. Locking eyes with him, she mentally prepares for what he is going to say. Her mind is so jumbled right now and her emotions are right at the forefront which is the last place she wants them to be. The state she is currently in makes her so much more vulnerable than she wants to be and she is struggling with her own mind as it works to rebuild the walls before anything else happens.

Once she makes eye contact with him, Callen confidently and with purpose. "There is nowhere else I would rather be right now than here with you. I know this is hard for you and I would love to say I understand why, but all I can do is guess about why you keep pushing me away." He sees her immediately tense as he realizes she thinks he is pushing for a revelation of some kind. "I don't expect you to tell me anything you aren't ready to say. Just don't feel like you need to apologize."

Taking a chance, he reaches out and claims her hand in his. "You are more important to me than you are ready to believe and I get that. I just need to you to not shut me out. At least try not to shut me out." He looks down at their joined hands as he gently rubs his thumb over her soft skin. He takes a deep intake of air as he lifts his eyes to find hers once again. "I'm not asking you to tell me everything or even anything. Please, just let me be here for you." Callen hopes Nell can at least trust him to stay by her side until she is ready to let him in completely.

Nell can see in his eyes that Callen is being honest. Possibly more importantly, she can feel he is being honest. For the first time in way too long, she wants something more than just

friendship with a man. If she could find a way to let herself trust him, then she knows he would protect her against anything and everything that came their way. That's how he is. G. Callen, above almost any other man, protects those he cares about.

She offers him a soft smile and squeezes his hand as she speaks from her heart, "There is so much confusion in my head right now that I can't even trust myself. Things that I should know aren't even there anymore. I have pushed some stuff so far away in my head that I wasn't even able to see what I should have known was a threat." Nell can see the confusion on his face as he struggles to understand what she is trying to say. "I am trying to make sense of everything in my head. I just need more time."

He takes a calculated risk and moves his hand to her face lightly stroking her cheek. He watches as she lets her guard down and leans into his hand. Callen feels completely overwhelmed by the surge of feelings the gesture causes and fights the urge to pull her into an embrace. Not wanting to push her any further as well as not trusting himself in the moment, Callen pulls his hand away from her face as he stands offering his hand for her to take. "How 'bout we walk a little."

Nell takes his hand long enough for him to pull her to a standing position. She immediately misses the intimacy of his hand on her face and wishes it was possible to go back in time. It would so much easier for everyone involved if she could just erase the past. One event in time that has had more ramifications than any other in her life. She never really expected it to cause so much pain to so many others and questions whether all of this could have been stopped all those years ago had she just been braver.

They walk alongside each other taking in the sights in silence. As they walk down yet another sidewalk, Callen sees a restaurant and glances at his watch realizing he is hungry. Seeing it almost noon, he looks over at Nell as she pulls out her phone to take a photo. "Do you see that over there? It's really pretty, don't you think?" As he nods his head, Nell offers him one of the first real smiles he has seen for several days.

He gives her a moment to snap the picture before he speaks, "You hungry?" He gestures to the left at a small restaurant. "It looks like it's got the typical cafe stuff like sandwiches and coffee. Maybe, they even have some halfway decent tea." She tries not to laugh as she realizes he is trying to make it sound as appealing as possible in hopes of getting her to walk inside the doors.

He braces himself for her to say she's not hungry and refuse to eat. She looks up at him putting on her best version of a serious face and speaks evenly. "I don't know Callen." He reaches for her arm as he starts to speak, but his words are interrupted by hers. "I'm going to have to insist you pay if I agree to go in there with you." She lets out the laugh she's been holding as she sees the relief wash over his face.

Shaking his head and joining her in laughter, he grabs her arm guiding her towards the entrance. "Not nice, Nell. Not nice at all." He is glad to see she is relaxing a bit and as they move through the small establishment, he lets himself enjoy the normalcy of the moment. They find a quiet spot along the side of the restaurant and start looking through the menus. After ordering their food, Callen and Nell sit back enjoying quiet conversation about nothing in particular as they wait for their food to arrive.

The waitress brings their meals and they settle back enjoying the ambiance. When the waitress comes back to bring their check, Nell inquires about local events. "Is there anything close to the area to fill some free time. Anything special going on?" The waitress thinks for a minute and then lets them know about a small street fair that is happening about ten minutes down the road. She tells them there are several vendors and some small games set up through the rest of the day.

Nell thanks her and glances over at Callen. She isn't entirely sure he would be interested in a street fair and is pleasantly surprised when he speaks before she can. "Sounds like fun. You interested?" Street fairs aren't typically Callen's first choice of something to kill time, but he noticed a small glimmer in Nell's eyes as the waitress spoke and he is more than willing to do anything if it will help take her mind off of everything.

She looks at Callen in surprise and silently questions him. He smiles and stands up offering his hand once again. After Nell excuses herself to use the restroom, he goes to pay the bill. As they walk back towards the car, Nell finally speaks up. "Are you sure, Callen. I can't imagine a street fair is something you are really that interested in checking out." He sees her stop walking as she questions him and he does as he turns to face her.

He thinks for a moment before speaking, "It's fine, Nell. Honestly it isn't something I would go to on my own, but I am willing to try it if you interested." Callen knows she enjoys these types of events and finds himself a bit eager to see it through her perspective. Gesturing his head towards the parking lot, he starts walking again.

They reach the car and she offers the keys to Callen. He takes the keys and unlocks the doors before walking around to the driver's side. As he reaches to open his door, he hears the lock engage and looks inside the car to see a very amused Nell. Using the key to unlock his own door, he slides in the seat and gives her an equally amused expression. "Really? It's like being in the car with Deeks."

She simply shrugs as she tries to stifle a laugh. She puts on her seat belt and waits for Callen to start the car. As the car pulls out of the parking area, Nell watches the scenery changes. She is happy to be away from the chaos and is pleasantly surprised at just how relaxed the day is making her. It's just after one when they find the street fair in full swing. Callen pays a young boy who is collecting money in exchange for parking at a local business. They smile at him as he bids them good day.

As they approach the first of many vendors, Nell stops to look at the items for sale. Callen watches her as she makes a myriad of faces while she searches the display. He laughs as she starts to talk under her breath to no one in particular. She turns to look at him as her hand goes to rest on her hip. She smiles at him as she speaks, "Something funny, Callen?"

Callen puts his hands up in front of his chest as he shakes his head. "I don't think I have ever seen you make half those faces, especially in under five minutes." She smacks his arm lightly as she moves to the next display. He is enjoying the change of pace and is starting to understand why Nell enjoys street fairs. Though he figures it wouldn't be nearly the same if he were here on his own.

They spend the next hour or so perusing various vendors and displays while enjoying comfortable conversation as well as the usual bantering they had been engaging in during the weeks leading up to the Herrold incident. As they walk towards the next set of vendors, Nell pulls Callen aside pointing to a more quiet area. Following her to a bench, it takes him a moment to realize she needs a break from the onslaught of people; the street fair has gotten much busier in the last half hour.

They sit down on the bench together and he leans his head back slightly taking in the warmth of the sun. Before long, Nell speaks softly, "I know you guys want answers." He fixes his gaze off in the distance afraid if he makes eye contact she will stop talking. "I don't know how to do this. Talk about everything that happened before." She places her hand on Callen's arm and waits for him to look at her before continuing. "_I_ can't even make sense of what is going on."

He wishes there were some magical set of words he could offer to fix her confusion. Placing his own hand over hers, Callen leans a little closer as he answers the question. "Maybe it isn't for you to understand. Maybe you just need to bounce it off someone else and let them put the pieces together."

She struggles to maintain eye contact as she feels the tears threatening to fall. When she asked him to come with her today, Nell's intention was twofold. She wanted to get a break from everything that is happening and she wanted to giver herself a chance to start the process of trusting him. Nell considered the possibility that maybe she could even open up to him. It seemed pretty straightforward in her head. Being with Callen today gave a taste of what things could be like and she feels like it could be a good thing to just let it all out.

Callen watches as his words penetrate her defenses. Rather than push the envelope or put her any more on the spot than she already is, he opts for a riskier move. He reaches out for her and pulls her close. He hopes she can feel how much he cares about her. Nell momentarily tenses in his embrace, but then he feels her hand go around his waist and pull him even closer. They stay wrapped up in each other for a moment before Callen hears her speak. Her words are spoken so softly he almost misses what she says, "This isn't the first time I've met him Callen."

He reaches his hand up and runs it through her hair as he hugs her tightly. "I know." Callen can feel her body start to shake as the tears take over. She is pretty certain Callen had already made this connection, but Nell wanted to show him hat she was starting to trust him. Knowing she isn't ready to go into any other details, he simply holds her as she cries.

Allowing him to comfort her is a scary prospect, but she keeps reminding herself he would never hurt her. Logically, she knows this fact already. It's just hard to convince herself to risk letting down her defenses. It's such an automatic response to push people away and she has to fight her psyche to push past the pre-programmed response. After several minutes, she regains her composure and slowly sits up facing him. She locks eyes with him as she tries to figure out what to say.

Callen reaches up and lightly swipes his thumb across her cheek wiping away the stray tears. He knows this gesture is much more intimate than anything she has allowed in a long time. As if sensing her trepidation, he smiles softly as he speaks. "Follow me. I have an idea."

They stand up and he takes her by the hand. Not wanting to make her uncomfortable, he locks eyes with her before nodding his head in the direction of their hands. "You good?" She gives him a smile and nods her head as she starts to walk. Nell lets herself enjoy the feel of her hand in his as they move through the crowd.

She chuckles when she sees the game they stop at to play. Callen gives the man some money and turns around giving Nell a cocky smirk. She gestures with her hands for him to continue. He chose a game in which the goal is to shoot the star completely out of the middle of a slip of paper. The man hands him a pellet filled gun as he steps aside to watch. Callen takes aim and empties the pellets into the paper.

The man retrieves the paper and brings it over to the counter where Nell and Callen are standing. "Sorry man, you needed to get the entire star off the paper. You still got a corner right at the top. Close, but not quite. Maybe you girlfriend would have better luck?" Nell laughs out loud and Callen is pretty sure it's the most beautiful sound he has heard.

He locks eyes with her and gestures for her to give it shot. She shakes her head and continues to laugh. Handing the man more money, Nell suddenly realizes he seriously wants her to try. "No way Callen. If you can't mange, how do you think I will?" They watch as the man fills the gun once again and hands to Nell. She gives him another look that clearly says she would prefer not, but he simply hands her the gun.

"You got this Nell. Just give a try. The point isn't to actually win anyway. It's kinda set up to make you fail." He steps slightly to the side watching her point the gun at the target. He is actually quite impressed at her ability as he watches her shoot the weapon. After she empties the clip, the man repeats the same action as before.

Placing the paper in front of them, he remarks in a slightly amused voice. "Looks like we know who should keep the ammo in this relationship. Pick whatever you fancy little lady." Callen just shakes his head as Nell smirks in his direction. She chooses a stuffed dog with a red ribbon around its neck. As they move away from the vendor, Nell concludes it has been a really good day so far.

They wander around for while longer before their day is interrupted by the sound of Callen's phone. He reaches into his pocket to retrieve the offending device giving Nell a soft smile. "Hey Sam. What's up?" Nell walks over a vendor near Callen as he talks to his partner.

Callen finishes the call and immediately goes to Nell's side. Placing his hand squarely on the small of her back, she notices the distinct shift in his demeanor. He is in full-blown agent mode as he moves her through the crowd. "What's going on Callen? What did Sam say?"

Not saying a word, Callen scans the crowd constantly as they reach the car. He opens the door and waits for her to get in before closing it firmly behind her. He moves quickly to the driver's side and gets into the car with her. He gives her hand a firm squeeze before starting the car and placing it in gear. Driving through the streets, Callen checks the the mirrors frequently to ensure no one is following them.

Nell is getting increasingly more anxious and finally addresses Callen again. "What is going on?" She recognizes the route and knows they are going to the Mission. There has to have been a change in the case and from the way Callen is reacting, it doesn't appear to be anything good. "You are starting to freak me out here, Callen. Talk."

He looks over at Nell and takes a deep intake of air before speaking. He isn't really sure how to tell her what is going on without completely loosing what progress they made today. "Herrold made contact with LAPD about fifteen minutes ago." Callen watches as her face falls and she seems to sink back into her head.


	15. Chapter 15

**Author's Notes – None of the characters from NCIS: Los Angeles are mine. **

**Here you guys go! I am hoping to get back on track posting updates once a week. Not sure it will work, but I'm going to give it a go! I have a more clear picture of the middle section of this story and that is making it much easier to write. **

** Please, as always, read and review. I have officially broken the 100 mark for comments! That has me very excited. I never expected this big of a following and I'm happy you all are enjoying reading this story as much as I am enjoying writing it.**

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Reaching the Mission, Callen gets out of the car and starts towards the entrance. He looks back when he realizes Nell is not at his side and realizes she never got out of the car. Walking to the passenger side, he opens the door and kneels down so he is eye level with her. Placing his hand on her arm, he gives her a moment to collect her thoughts.

Looking down at her hands, she speaks in a quivering voice. "I don't know how much longer I can do this Callen." He sees her shake her head in an attempt to will the tears from falling and it almost breaks him as he realizes just how fragile her grip on her own sanity is in that moment. "It's too much. I put everything about this guy in a place so far in the back of my head that I didn't even realize it was him when he approached me at the pub. How did I block things so much that I danced with this guy and didn't make the connection?"

She lifts her gaze and he is now looking into her hazel eyes. Reaching up and placing his hand on her cheek before pulling her into a gentle embrace. He holds her for a moment before pulling away and speaking with enough confidence for both of them. "Then let me do this for you. Until you are ready to be a part of what's going on. Just hang out in the lounge by the bullpen."

He gives her a minute to comprehend what he says, then stands up pulling Nell to her feet as he straightens to full height. Placing a hand around her shoulder, they walk into the Mission together. Callen walks Nell to the couch located in the lounge area and then moves quickly up the stairs. Upon entering the ops center, he sees his team along with Hetty waiting for his arrival.

Hetty locks eyes with him and inquires about Nell's absence. "I presume Ms. Jones is somewhere safe in the building." The worry on her face, as well as his team's faces, tells Callen the contact that Herrold made is worse than he had anticipated. He nods his head in response to Hetty's question not wanting to disclose any information about Nell's current frame of mind. Moving to join his team, one look from Callen makes it clear conversation about Nell is to ceased and they need to get down to business.

Looking at Deeks, who Callen figures was the point of contact with LAPD, he speaks clearly. "What do we have?" Callen is almost afraid to ask and is silently thankful that Detective Michaels is not joining them for this brief. He isn't so sure he is interested in being anywhere near the man that already was the cause of one of Callen's outbursts.

Deeks nods in Eric's direction as he begins to speak. "Detective Michaels called me after they received a envelope containing a disk that was addressed to those in charge of Nell's investigation. Looking over in Callen's direction, Deeks addresses him specifically. "He wanted to be part of this brief, but I convinced him I would simply keep him in the loop."

Eric takes over at this point as he cues a video on the big screen. "The disk contained this monologue followed by a link." He pushes play on the video as they gather around to watch and listen. Callen stands with his arms crossed as Herrold rambles. The words are just what the team would expect from a psychopath. The problem is this psychopath is requesting something no one in the room is willing to give; Nell.

Callen looks at Eric as the monologue ends and inquires about the link. "That's the mystery right now. When I click on it, the camera shows what appears to be media room. The camera is zoomed in on a television that is showing a series of pictures that appear to be surveillance photos. I have been able to identify four different women. The pictures keep repeating showing the women in various places and on multiple different days. It appears to be on a loop." Callen looks amongst his team as they all agree on exactly what Herrold is trying to convey.

Sam inquires with Deeks on just how much manpower the LAPD may be able to offer and how the police may be able to assist on isolating who the women are. The brainstorming session is interrupted by Eric's voice. "Guys, you may wanna check this out." The team turns towards the big screen as Herrold makes an appearance on the tape. He speaks for another minute before a new set of images appears on the screen. An audible gasp escapes Kensi's mouth, while Deeks mutters a series of swear words. Sam looks at Callen and the two men lock eyes for a second before returning their attention to the screen.

Callen's voice is heard as they watch Herrold on the screen. "Eric, can you trace the feed?" Callen looks over at the young tech and sees him shake his head. "Damnit! We need to figure out where this guy is Eric." Immediately regretting his tone, he turns to face Eric as he apologizes. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you."

Sam's voice is heard next as he calls for Callen to look at the screen. As if seeing his actions wasn't bad enough, now they have to endure hearing him speak once again. "You see these girls. They are my new insurance policies. I know you cops don't like to put innocent people at risk and I figure why not use that to my advantage. The feed will be continuous so you can all enjoy the show. It will show images from all the girls. You can think of it as a choose-your-own-adventure book. What they endure, and for how long, is entirely in your hands. You know how to make it end. Nell returns to her home and after we are together again, you get the locations of the girls. Tick, tick, tick."

Herrold apparently feels the need to ensure the team is taking him seriously as he approaches one of the women and puts on a show for the cameras. Everyone in the room can feel the tension building as they try to block the screams from the woman he has kidnapped.

Hetty breaks the horrified silence as she delegates tasks in quick succession. "Mr. Beale, work on tracing the feed and let us know when you pinpoint a location for any of them. Also, check to see if Mr. Herrold is tapping into the feed for the cameras by Nell's house. He has to know if Ms. Jones comes back to her home or not and I doubt he will be close enough to watch it."

Turning to face the rest of the team, she addresses Kensi and Deeks first. "Ms. Blye and Mr. Deeks, dig further into Mr. Herrold's past. There has to be something we missed. Find it." The pair nod their heads and quickly make their way down the stairs as they move towards the exit.

Turning her attention to Sam and Callen, she addresses Sam first. "Go to Ms. Jones home and search it from top to bottom. Take a forensics team with you. See if Mr. Herrold has somehow bugged Nell's home." She gestures for Sam to go before addressing Callen.

Looking at the senior agent-in-charge, she lowers her authoritative tone. "Mr. Callen, take Ms. Jones back to the safe house. Stay with her. If we need your assistance, then Mr. Hanna will contact you. In the meantime, no more road trips and do not leave the house." Callen nods his head and moves out of the ops center.

Hetty returns her attention to Eric as she moves in closely behind him. "Mr. Beale, do you need me to assign another set of eyes to watch the live feed from that room." Pausing for a moment, she quietly adds another point. "I suspect watching the interactions between this madman and the women he has kidnapped is going to be difficult to say the least, especially in light of who the preferred target actually is."

Eric catches Hetty's gaze and shakes his head vigorously. "No Hetty. I'll be fine. I have to do this for Nell. I can't go out there in the field, but I can watch from here and work on finding something that can give us a location." She looks at him and sees a hint of desperation in his eyes. Understanding fully this is Eric's only means to help, she concedes.

"Alright, Mr. Beale. Let me know if you need anything at all." Hetty places a deep emphasis on the final words and Eric knows it's her way of offering an out if he needs one. Turning in his chair as Hetty exits the ops center, Eric feels more pressure than ever to find the proverbial needle in a haystack.

Making his way to the lounge area, Callen sees Nell sleeping soundly on the couch. Knowing how much sleep she didn't get last night, he opts to let her sleep while he works on releasing some tension. Stopping by Hetty's office to let her know he is going to let Nell sleep a bit longer, Callen sees a glimpse of just how much this case is affecting her as well.

"How are you Hetty?" Callen knows his operational manager well enough to know she won't be completely honest with him, but he is close enough to her that he can't just let it go. She sits back in her chair prompting him to take a seat in front of her desk.

"I would suspect I'm doing about as well as you Mr. Callen. The big difference would likely be the amount of sleep the two of us are getting. Why don't you take this opportunity to rest along with Ms. Jones? I am aware you did not go home last night and I am certain you chose to keep watch over the safe house instead."

Callen offers a smirk in response to her revelation. She does know him well enough to know he wouldn't have just gone home. "I'm not really tired right now. I was going to the firing range. Get rid of some tension. I need to make sure I am as calm as possible when Nell wakes up." He leans forward in his chair and locks eyes with Hetty. In an uncharacteristic moment of uncertainty, Callen speaks softly. "We are going to get this guy, right?"

Hetty leans forward holding Callen's gaze. "Indeed we are, Mr. Callen. He can't keep hidden for long." Taking a breath before speaking again, she chooses her words carefully. "Mr. Herrold has a weakness for our young Ms. Jones. He won't be able to fight the urge to find her much longer and that will cause him to get reckless in his attempt to reach her. My only fear is Ms. Jones' reaction when she learns of the latest turn of events."

Callen gives her knowing nod. He is all too aware the latest changes will affect Nell and on a much deeper scale than even Hetty realizes. He just hopes he can keep her from falling back over the brink. Callen is afraid once Nell finds out the twist presented by Herrold, she will once again sacrifice her own safety to protect the women being held in her place. "She will need to be watched closely Mr. Callen. You will also need to be able to set aside your own feelings for her in case she, or we, need her to be a part of reaching a conclusion to these events."

Hearing Hetty's words, Callen immediately feels the anger welling up inside his body. The thought that Hetty would entertain the notion of using Nell as bait is one he can't even imagine. The chances of something going wrong are too high for him to be willing to risk her safety. He starts to protest the notion, but is cut off by Hetty's voice, "No telling how long Ms. Jones will be sleeping. It is best if you go to the firing range now and get all that excess tension released before she wakes."

He watches as Hetty opens a file and begins working on the contents. Callen is well aware this signals the end of the conversation and jerks his body out of the chair moving in the direction of the firing range. Arriving at the firing range, Callen pulls on the head gear in one swift, angry motion and moves the target down the lane. He picks up his weapon and empties the clip in quick succession. He repeats this process several times picturing Herrold's face each time.

His target practice is interrupted by the sound of his phone. Retrieving it and looking at the screen, he sees Eric's name pop up. _Might wanna come to ops. Nell is up here._ Callen quickly re-holsters his weapon and cleans up the area where he was firing. He leaves the range and moves across the building to the ops center.

Upon entering he hears a welcome sound. Nell laughing. Presumably at some joke told by her partner-in-crime. Walking in Eric shoots Callen a look that indicates he needs to check on things that Nell probably shouldn't see right then. Taking the hint for what it is, Callen moves towards Nell and joins the laughter.

"Guess I should hang out in ops more often. Eric apparently has a sense of humor that I don't see too often." Nell smiles at Callen as he reaches her side. "You ready to go Nell? Hetty wants you back at the safe house and I should probably shower sometime soon." She nods in his direction and bids Eric goodbye with a hug.

They walk out of the building in silence and get into Callen's car. After fastening their seat belts, Nell looks over at him and waits for him to acknowledge her gaze. "I'm going to have to hear at some point, you know." She gives him a small smile hoping to make him feel less anxious about sharing.

It comes out more as a statement than a question and Callen is aware she is referring to what new development required his presence in ops. He just isn't ready to lose what momentum they have achieved today. Not yet. "There's a coffee shop down the street from the safe house. Thought we could stop and pick up something for the morning."

She understands the unspoken meaning in his avoidance of the statement and opts to let it go for now. It can wait until tomorrow. She thinks maybe for tonight they can just ignore the big elephant in the room and give their minds the illusion all is well.

Callen looks over to see Nell watching the scenery go by as they make their way to the coffee shop and wishes he could take away all the thoughts running through her head. He knows she is filling in her own version of what was so important that they needed Callen back in ops. The day was such a nice distraction and he had hoped to end the evening just as relaxed.

As they get closer to their destination, Callen interrupts her thoughts with a question. "Interested in grabbing some dinner while we are there as well? We can pick up whatever we want for the morning after we eat and then head back to the house." He waits for a response as Nell ponders the question.

They reach the coffee shop and Nell still hasn't given Callen an answer which leaves him a little bit concerned. Looking over at him as he puts the car into park, she finally responds. "Sure, we can eat here first." She knows he is confused as to why she didn't answer him immediately and gives him the answer without him having to ask the question. "I wanted to see how busy the place was before I answered. Not sure I can handle a big crowd right now."

Giving an almost imperceptible sigh of relief, Callen smiles as he nods his head. Getting out of his seat, he reaches Nell's door as she opens it to exit the vehicle. Offering his hand, Callen pulls Nell gently to her feet. As they walk towards the entrance of the coffee shop, he sees her looking at the outdoor patio area. "We can sit outside, if you want to."

He sees a brief flash of concern go across her as she scans the outlying area nervously. Stopping her just outside the entrance, he turns her so they are facing each other. Placing both hands on her arms, blue eyes meet hazel before words are spoken. Taking a calculated risk, he places his hand on her cheek and cups her face as he speaks softly. "I'm right here, Nell. I've got you."

She takes a deep intake of air, Nell closes her eyes and leans into his hand as if she is attempting to absorb his strength. After a moment, she opens her eyes and looks at him. She smiles as she places her hand over the one covering her cheek. "I know you do, Callen." Squeezing his hand gently, she nods her head indicating she is ready to move forward.

After ordering their dinner, they find a place at an outside table and relax into casual conversation. Neither one brings up the case and they enjoy getting to know each other a little more. Nell shares a story from her childhood and Callen laughs enjoying the ease at which they seem to be communicating, especially in light of everything surrounding their new-found camaraderie.

Having finished eating, Callen and Nell move back into the coffee shop to figure out what to order for the morning. Looking over the multitude of options, they settle on several muffins and pastries which will give them plenty of choices depending on their mood by tomorrow. As Callen waits for the order, she moves a little further down the display to see what other things they offer.

Nell starts back towards him when she sees the order has been brought to the register. She watches from a short distance as Callen pays for their goodies. He catches her eye for a second and nods his head in the direction of the bathroom as he silently indicates where he is going. As she re-focuses her gaze on the direction she is walking, Nell feels the unmistakeable jarring of being bumped by someone.

Looking up, she immediately tenses and drops her coffee cup. The man in front of her apologizes and immediately moves to help her recover the dropped item while apologizing for the contact. Nell backs up quickly and looks around in a state of panic for Callen.

The man reaches for Nell in an effort to get a response to his offer for a replacement cup of coffee. She immediately recoils and stifles a scream as she continues to look desperately in the direction Callen would have gone. She tell herself she just needs to stay safe long enough for him to get back.

Using the patrons in the coffee shop to her advantage, she steps away from the man as she speaks loudly. "Don't touch me! Go away!" The man moves in her direction and the panic Nell feels takes over. She yells Callen's name as loud as her voice will allow. The man puts his hands up and moves quickly out of the coffee shop.

Callen is coming out of the bathroom as he hears his name called. The level of fear he hears in Nell's voice causes him to drop the purchased items and his hand instinctively lands on his weapon. He waits to retrieve the gun from its resting place tucked into the back of his pants as he takes in the scene. There is a clear view as he quickly makes his way to Nell.

Coming up behind her, he reaches out and touches her shoulder. She immediately jerks away from his touch and he has to block an incoming blow aimed straight for his face. Grabbing her by the wrist, he pulls her close and whispers in her hair. As she realizes it's him, Nell relaxes in his embrace. Pulling her away, he sees her panic-stricken face and speaks. "What happened, Nell?"

She shakes her head vigorously and pulls herself back into his embrace unable to speak at that moment. The waitress who helped them with their order approaches Callen. "Is she alright sir?" Callen shrugs his shoulder in response as he holds Nell tightly. The waitress continues speaking without any prompting from Callen.

"There was a guy here and he bumped into her just after you finished paying. She got really freaked out when she saw him. Her coffee fell and he tried to help her. The closer he tried to get to her, the more scared she got. I saw her looking for you, but didn't know where you went."

Not worrying about the waitress still standing there, Callen pulls Nell away from his chest and lifts her chin so their eyes meet. He doesn't have time to ask the question before Nell's voice gives an answer that puts Callen on full alert.

"It was him, Callen. It was William Herrold."


	16. Chapter 16

**Author's Notes – Any of the characters from NCIS: LA are not mine. I am just borrowing them. **

** I hope no one minds another chapter this week. The flow is going really well right now and I'm enjoying the twists that appear out of nowhere. This story has shifted in ways I never initially planned and I'm having a blast being a part of its unfolding. **

** Please read and review. Thanks once again to all who post comments as well as those who have this story, as well as my other one, on alert. You guys keep me motivated to continue writing. I am also happy to say it has been a welcome distraction, though I'm not sure my housework agrees! **

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Callen reacts quickly. In one swift motion, he pushes Nell against a back wall as he pulls his weapon from the holster located at his back. Using his own body as a shield, Callen places Nell securely behind his own body while he pulls his phone out and activates the agent in distress code.

The already overly active ops center takes on a new level of tension as the alert reaches its destination. Eric immediately triangulates Callen's location and sends it to the rest of the team. Hetty makes her way into the ops center as Eric is in the process of alerting LAPD and requesting all available units be dispatched to the location as well. "Eric, what do we know?" Hetty's voice offers the only hint of calm in the entire room.

"Nothing at this point." Eric answers quickly as he is dials Callen's number. He places the call on speaker as they wait for Callen to answer. Hetty remains quiet as the phone rings for the second time before Callen's voice comes through loud and clear resonating through the ops center.

Without a question even being asked, Callen gives the pertinent information. "We are fine. At least at this point. Herrold was in the coffee shop where we stopped. He bumped into Nell." He considers how to explain the next part knowing it was his mistake that could have cost them Nell. "But left before I could get him." Callen decides to leave any further explanation alone knowing he will have to go into more detail as soon as the team arrives.

Before Hetty or Eric can inquire any further, several LAPD officers enter the coffee shop followed closely by Kensi and Deeks. "The cavalry has arrived. I will check in with you guys shortly." He disconnects the call before either one can protest.

Hetty looks at Eric as he shrugs his shoulder in response to the disconnection. "He hung up. You want me to call back?" Hetty shakes her head and moves closer to the technical analyst. Even though she is certain Eric knows what to do, Hetty gives the official orders nonetheless.

"Access the street cameras Mr. Beale. Find William Herrold. Check and see if it possible to access the cameras inside the coffee shop as well. And if Mr. Callen contacts you again, inform him I need to speak with him. Make sure the agents at the safe house sweep the property and place them on high alert." With the final sentence spoken, Hetty turns and leaves the ops center.

Sam arrives within minutes of Kensi and Deeks taking no time at all to find his team. He joins the group at the back of the coffee shop. LAPD has the perimeter taped off and the staff is being gathered in a central location for questioning. The elite team create a circle with their bodies with Nell securely in the center. Knowing his team will need an explanation, Callen sets the stage for a conversation he isn't really interested in having with anyone.

Looking directly at Kensi and Deeks who are positioned side-by-side, he speaks in a low tone still not certain of what danger lies ahead. "Take Nell back to the safe house. Stay with her there until either Sam or I tell you otherwise. No one is to come in the house with the exception of our team. The other agents need to stay on the perimeter."

Kensi and Deeks nod their heads indicating their understanding. Kensi moves to take Nell by the arm, but stops when the young woman turns towards Callen. She gives him a frightened look and reaches for his arm. Callen locks eyes with hers and knows exactly what she is thinking.

Taking her by the shoulder, Callen nods his head in the direction of the partners. "Go with Kensi and Deeks. They will keep you safe. I have to get the scene secure and see where to go from here." His reaction confuses her more than the orders he issued. The fact that he is so detached has her wondering what exactly is happening. "Kensi, take her now. I will check in as soon I can."

Fighting the urge to gather her in his arms and pretending he doesn't see the tears forming in her eyes, Callen turns his back to her in order to address Sam. He remains quiet as Kensi and Deeks make their way towards the door with Nell in tow. With one final look, they exit the building.

Once she is safely in the car, Callen lets out a frustrated sigh and rubs his hands roughly over his face. He takes a chance and looks at his partner only to see he appears equally frustrated. Before he has a chance to speak, Sam asks the first of what Callen is pretty certain will be many questions.

"Where were you, G? What did you see?" Sam is trying to put the pieces together into some sort of picture that makes sense. He knows how good Callen is and there is no way Herrold would have gotten close to Nell without Callen taking him down.

Callen looks at Sam and takes a breath before speaking. "I was in the bathroom. I didn't see him. I came out at the same time Nell yelled for me, but he was already gone." He braces himself for the verbal lashing he is certain his partner is going to give him and knows he deserves whatever is about to be said.

Sam crosses his arms across his chest clearly livid. "You're kidding, right G. Because I know you aren't seriously telling me you left Nell alone so you could go to the little boys' room." Getting nothing from the smaller man, Sam throws his hands up in the air and continues his tirade. "You left her out here alone. Hetty told you take her to the safe house and no more stops. This maniac is out here just waiting for an opening and you practically handed her to him on a silver platter."

Callen knows he made a mistake and he is just as pissed at himself as his partner is with him. "Look, Sam. I know I screwed up. Don't you think I don't realize that much." His words come out much more harsh than he intended, especially considering Sam isn't even the cause of his anger.

Sam looks at the smaller man and soften his stance slightly upon seeing how much Callen is blaming himself. Make no mistake this screw-up is entirely Callen's fault, but he needs to find out why Callen dropped the ball like he did. "What the hell happened, G?"

Callen pauses for moment trying to figure out how to explain his actions to his partner. As he struggles to find the words, his partner looses patience. "What gives, man. You had no business stopping in the first place, but to just leave her hanging like that. How would this have played if he hadn't gotten spooked by who knows what and grabbed her instead of running? What then?" Sam knows he is pushing his partner, but he needs to make sure Callen sees just how dangerous him being distracted is for her safety. And honestly, it isn't even something Sam should have to go over with him.

Callen reacts in just the manner Sam expected. He speaks in an even, low tone emphasizing every word. "I'm too close. Alright, Sam. Are you happy?" Callen is struggling with the fact that he let his feelings put her in danger. "I got caught up in being a normal person for once. Enjoying the company of a woman that I am quickly falling for and I didn't even stop to think about anything but how good it felt to just be with her in that moment." Having had enough of the conversation, Callen turns to walk away from Sam.

Sam grabs Callen's arm as he turns to leave and takes his turn to speak. "Question is what now? How is this going to play out, G?" He needs to find some way to get Callen re-focused. They will need everyone, including Callen, to capture this guy and close the case. Callen's current frame of mind is clouding all ability he has to fully participate.

Still standing with his back to Sam, he shakes his head. "I don't know, Sam. I really don't know." Callen turns to face Sam and tries to maintain his composure. "I know I need to get my head in this, but all I can think about is her. Being with her. Keeping her safe and being the one person she can trust again." He shifts his stance to more comfortable position, then continues, "She told me she knows this guy, Sam. Nell was opening up to me finally when you called about Herrold making contact."

Sam knows Callen is trying to shift the conversation and ignore what he has to do in order to get the job done. "Don't do that G. Don't." Sam's voice resonates the unmistakeable order being conveyed to the smaller man. "You have to find a way to function as Special Agent-in-Charge G. Callen. Not as the guy who wants to get the girl. I'm glad she is trusting you more. Believe me, I am very happy for you. But, we need you here. Not there."

Sam is right. Callen can see that. He just isn't convinced he can give him, or any of them, what they are asking. The gravitational pull towards Nell is so strong that there doesn't appear to be a way to resist or break away.

Sam, feeling slightly bad for being as harsh with Callen as he was, speaks up again. "When all this is over. When we get Herrold. When Nell is safe." He wants to make sure his partner is really listening to what he is saying, so waits until Callen locks eyes with him before speaking again purposely emphasizing the current focus of his partner. "When Nell is safe. And those other women are safe. Then, and only then, do you work on a relationship with her. You have to get your head in the game or nothing else will matter."

Taking a deep breath and nodding his head, Callen concedes to his partner. The past few days have been such a charge of emotion that Callen isn't even sure which end is up anymore. He definitely wants a relationship with Nell, but not like this. Not based on the need to protect her. He wants a relationship where they are both able to fully invest.

Sam gives his partner a light slap on the arm and gestures with his head for them to join the interviewing of the staff. They walk over towards the waitresses and for the first time, probably since all this started, Callen is fully focused and in complete control of himself.

Kensi and Deeks arrive back at the safe house and verify the property is secure before bringing Nell inside. The odds of Herrold making his way to their location is low, but no one is taking chances. Moving into the living room, Nell takes her usual position on the couch as Kensi and Deeks follow her into the room.

Looking over at Kensi, Deeks inquires as to where the bathroom is located. He is hoping a few minutes alone with Kensi will make talking about what happened a little easier. He gives a slight nod to his partner as he leaves the room and Kensi knows exactly what Deeks is thinking.

Sitting down next to Nell, Kensi softly touches her arm. "Hey. How you doin'? Things got a bit crazy today at the coffee shop, yea?" She watches as Nell fights the tears welling up in her eyes. Hoping the conversation is quick for both their sakes, Kensi moves closer to her friend in an attempt to offer support.

Nell keeps her gaze on her hands as she talks. "I guess crazy would describe it. None of it makes sense though, you know. I mean why didn't he grab me. That would have been the perfect opportunity. Right?" She now makes contact with Kensi's mismatched eyes hoping for some sort of explanation that makes sense.

Giving her a sad smile, Kensi is no closer to understanding his actions today then anyone else. Trying to come up with something that might make sense, she speaks in a soothing voice. "I am guessing he just didn't think he could pull it off. He still has a few tricks up his sleeve. Maybe, he didn't want to risk it right then."

Nell is momentarily confused by Kensi words and then remembers Callen never told her what new information had come into the ops center that required his presence. Figuring that might have something to do with what Kensi said, Nell speaks up in a curious tone. "What tricks? Does this have something to do with the new information that LAPD gathered?" She is now fully engaged in the conversation and Kensi is on the defensive not having realized Callen didn't talk to Nell yet.

Carefully considering her next words and silently wishing Deeks would re-emerge even though she was certain it would still be another minute or two before he does, Kensi tries to sound confident as she gives Nell the bare minimum. "Herrold contacted the LAPD. He sent in a disk of himself talking. Just the usual stuff. Nothing we didn't expect." She hopes Nell will accept the incomplete explanation and leave the conversation alone.

Seeing Kensi's body language and having had enough experience in reading her cues, Nell shakes her head. "No, there's more to it than that. You guys would not have needed Callen to come back in just to listen to the rant of some madman. Spill it Kensi."

The sudden shift in Nell's demeanor is slightly unnerving for the agent. Nell's voice is much stronger than it was a minute ago and Kensi is momentarily transported to the locker room. Knowing she won't be able to hide anything from Nell, Kensi takes a breath before speaking.

Fortunately, she is given a moment's reprieve as her partner finds his way back to the front of the house. "So does this house have any good food stashed in the kitchen cause I could definitely eat something." Deeks goes to continue speaking, but stops when he sees the tension between the two ladies. "Or not." Shooting a look between them, "Girl talk gone bad?"

Kensi locks eyes with her partner before offering an explanation. "Callen didn't have the chance to fill Nell in on what Herrold gave the LAPD. I gave her the lowdown, but she thinks there is more to it than I offered." Deeks comes across the room and sits on the coffee table in front of the two women.

He starts to open his mouth, but his words are cut off by Nell's insistent voice. "Don't bullshit me, Deeks. No games." Shocked into silence, Deeks puts his hands up in the air in an attempt to give himself time to find the words that will diffuse the situation. "Kensi said Herrold gave the LAPD a disk that contained some sort of rant. What she failed to add is what else was on the disk or handed to the LAPD by him."

Giving Kensi a quick glance, Deeks makes the same decision Kensi made earlier and opts to simply give her the truth. Taking her hands in an attempt to ground her before he speaks, Deeks fills in the blanks. "Herrold also included a link that led to a live feed. The camera focused in on a big tv screen. He had a looping collage of pictures of four different women that looked like surveillance pictures running across the screen."

He feels Nell tense immediately and increases his hold on her hands as she tries to pull them from his grip. "There's more." She stops fighting him and re-focuses on the man in front of her. "He broke through the feed, or maybe he appeared in the room, and talked some more before the feed went back to the screen." Deeks is having trouble finding the right combination of words to explain the situation. He looks over at his partner for help.

Kensi takes over the conversation. "He has the four women from the pictures. Eric is trying to get a location, but he hasn't been able to get anything yet. He is alternating the feed between each of the women. Herrold wants us to see what he is going to do unless..." Her voice trails off as she locks eyes with her young friend.

Finding her voice and silently pissed at just how shaky it sounds, Nell tries to appear more in control than she is. "Unless what, Kensi?" Seeing the exchange of looks between the partners in front of her, Nell draws her own conclusion. "He wants me. Doesn't he?"

Nell pulls her hands out of Deeks' grip and stands up taking several deep breaths in a row. Deeks immediately moves to her small frame wanting to somehow convince Nell this isn't her fault. Placing his hands directly on her biceps, Deeks voice booms with confidence as he speaks.

"This isn't on you, Nell. You have to know that. He's a psychopath that doesn't need an excuse. The focus isn't about you as much as it is his sick need to hurt someone." As he looks into her eyes, Deeks knows Nell isn't buying anything he is saying. Desperate to put her mind at ease, he tries a different angle. "We will get this guy. You know we will. He already screwed up today and Eric will find him on some street camera somewhere along the way. In the meantime, one of us will be right by your side to make sure he doesn't come near you again."

Nell, growing tired of the rambling of the man in front of her and knowing his words are empty even if he believes them, looses her temper without forewarning. "ENOUGH!" The shout emanating from the young woman in front of him was completely unexpected. Removing his hands from her biceps, Deeks straightens his tall frame as she continues.

"I am so tired of the back and forth. I mean, seriously, how long do you guys really expect me to put my life on hold so you can get him? And at what cost? How many more women get to be tortured or killed because of me?" Deeks is floored by the words coming out of Nell's mouth and is stunned into silence. Kensi, seeing his inaction, takes the lead role in the conversation.

Kensi employs a more firm approach as she speaks this time. "You will stay here as long as it takes. This is what we do Nell, you of all people know that. We will protect you at all cost..." Nell's words interrupt the flow coming from Kensi.

Nell stands as straight as her small stature will allow and speaks with an authority that is usually expected from Hetty. "You know what Kensi, I do know what you guys do. I know you will give your lives to protect me. And I don't want, or expect, any of you to do that." She emphasizes the last sentence with a staccato neither has ever heard.

Giving herself a second to gather what courage she has, Nell stands toe-to-toe with Kensi as she speaks. "I'm ending this. Tonight. Enough people have been hurt because of me and I won't allow anyone else to take my place in this guy's sick fantasies."

Nell turns her frame and walks towards the front door prompting both Kensi and Deeks into action. Deeks stands directly against the front door blocking it with his frame, as Kensi physically restrains the young analyst. "Nell, come back to the living room. This isn't a game. Sit down. Now." Kensi is now in full agent mode and is not asking. She is ordering Nell to follow her directions.

Nell pulls her body from Kensi's grip and turns to once again face the agent that few would challenge, including the man using his body to render the door inaccessible. Nell locks eyes with Kensi and speaks with a venom neither of them has never heard before. "Of all the people in this room, I am well aware this isn't a game. I am the reason Herrold is doing what he is doing. I'm not _asking_ for your permission to leave, Kensi. I am _telling_ you I am leaving. You have no right to keep me here."

Taking a second to determine her next move, Kensi takes a gamble she knows will end badly. Gesturing for Deeks to move out from in front of the door, Kensi moves aside to allow Nell a clear path out the door. Giving his partner a look of confusion, he steps aside hoping he can figure out what angle Kensi is working before he needs to help.

As Nell approaches the door and opens it, Deeks moves to intervene. His action is stopped by Kensi's hand on his forearm and he locks eyes with her as he speaks in a low tone. "What the hell, Kensi?" His words prompt Kensi to give her partner the infamous trust me look. Except this time, Deeks has no idea what she has in mind.

As soon as Nell steps over the threshold of the safe house, Kensi springs forward grabbing her by the wrists. Pulling them securely together at the small of her back, Kensi removes the zip ties ever present in her pocket. Deeks looks at his partner in complete disbelief at the series of events unfolding in front of him.

Kensi, taking on her professional role and shifting from friend to what will likely be seen as the enemy, speaks clearly and loudly. "Nell Jones. You are under arrest."


	17. Chapter 17

**Author's Notes – Not mine!**

** Deepest apologies! I apparently should have never tried the whole weekly update thing. I will place blame squarely on real life. **

** I will warn you all ahead of time. This is a much shorter chapter than usual. By half at least. I thought a shorter chapter would be preferable to no chapter though! **

** Please read and review. Let me know your thoughts. Once again, thanks to all who read. I really, really do appreciate it!**

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"WHAT THE HELL KENSI!" Nell's reaction is full of anger and disbelief. "Are you kidding me? You can't arrest me!" She looks over at Deeks in an attempt to figure out what is going on. "Deeks!?" The blonde man simply holds his hands up and shrugs his shoulders clearly as confused as Nell. Addressing Kensi, she fires of a more direct question. "What are you arresting me for Kensi?"

Pulling Nell into the living room and sitting her on the couch, Kensi looks at her and speaks calmly. "I most certainly can arrest you. United States Code 18, section 118 allows for the arrest of an individual who is interfering with protective functions. You are under the protection of a federal agency and you are obstructing our ability to adequately protect you from a known serial murderer."

Never breaking eye contact with Kensi, Nell throws her body back against the couch. "This is ridiculous and you know it." Seeing that Kensi is not going to budge, Nell breaks eye contact and fixes her gaze on a picture across the room.

Deeks is still attempting to process what just happened and pulls Kensi aside for a private conversation. "Don't you think that was a little extreme, Kens? I mean it's Nell. We could have kept her here without arresting her."

Kensi gives her partner a death stare as she speaks in a tone that clearly says don't question the decision, "And how was that working out for you Deeks. Cause from my standpoint, Nell wasn't listening to either one of us. This prevents her from leaving. Period." She completely believes this was the only option to keep Nell in the house and she is more than willing to explain her actions to anyone who asks.

Deeks waits for his partner to calm down slightly before he speaks again. "Callen is going to be pissed. I don't even how to explain this..." He looks over at the back of Nell's frame sitting against the couch as he gestures towards her. "How the hell are we going to explain this to Callen? Did you consider that before this brilliant notion popped into your head." Deeks is well aware that Callen has developed a certain affinity for the young analyst and he is not looking forwards to the inevitable ass-chewing they will both get for Kensi's decision to arrest Nell.

Looking at her partner like it's the most obvious thing in the world, Kensi rolls her eyes slightly before speaking. "Would you rather explain to Callen why Nell is out there somewhere?" Kensi gestures towards the door for emphasis. "Cause I'm pretty sure that would piss him off a whole lot more than arresting her to keep her safe is going to piss him off." Secretly, she is happy Deeks included himself in the equation and knows he is going to back her regardless of his notion there was another option.

Deeks takes a moment to consider her words before nodding, "You probably have a point." He takes a breath before asking the next question. "Who's gonna call him?" Seeing the look on her face tells him the answer without her speaking any words. Shaking his head, Deeks tries to get out of the next task. "No. Not a chance. You've known him longer and he is less likely to kick your ass than mine. Seriously, Kens. You should call him."

Realizing there is no way she is going to let him off the hook, Deeks agrees on one condition. "Fine. I'll call. But I'm not talking to Callen. I'm calling Sam. He can tell him." Kensi smiles slightly at Deeks' obvious trepidation in breaking the news to Callen. She knows a pissed Callen is not one any of them really want to deal with and she silently hopes Sam can calm him down before they arrive at the safe house.

Walking back over to the couch, Kensi sits beside Nell. Knowing it is highly unlikely Nell will be able to see her point, she simply leans back against the couch and waits. Eventually Nell will be ready to hear her. She just hopes it isn't too long before that happens.

Deeks walks onto the front porch and pulls out his phone. Dialing Sam's number, he waits for a response. "Hey Deeks. What's up?" Deeks runs his free hand over his face as he tries to figure out the best approach. Coming up with nothing tangible, he just blurts it out.

"Kensi arrested Nell." Deeks closes his eyes as he waits for the words to sink in.

Sam glances for a brief second in Callen's direction before stepping off to the side where he can talk without Callen hearing him. "What the hell are you talking about Deeks? Why would Kensi arrest Nell?" Sam listens as the explanation is offered and nods his head frequently as he listens. "We'll be there in fifteen minutes."

Hanging up the phone, Deeks joins the ladies in the living room and sits on a free chair as they await the arrival of the senior partners.

Callen takes note of the frequency at which Sam has glanced in his direction and excuses himself to join his partner. Walking towards him, he sees Sam shift uncomfortably as he gets closer. "What's up, Sam?"

Unsure how his partner will react to the news, he confirms they are finished with the interviews and lets Callen know they need to get back to the safe house. Callen follows him, but is fairly certain there is something his partner is not telling him.

Once they are in the car, Callen turns his body to the side in order to face his partner as much as possible and simply stares at Sam. They drive into traffic before Sam speaks figuring at this point at least Callen is contained. Sam is expecting a loud and explosive reaction from the man sitting beside him.

Deciding there is really no way to sugar-coat the situation, Sam takes a play out of Deeks' book and speaks bluntly. "Kensi arrested Nell." He avoids making eye contact with Callen and settles for quick glances in the direction of the older man. Sam is happy to have the excuse of needing to keep his eyes on the road.

Callen shifts in his seat and looks at the large man beside him incredulously. He tries, and fails, to speak a couple of times before Sam decides to fill in the blanks. "Apparently Nell wanted to leave and was not willing to take no for an answer. Kensi tried reasoning with her with no luck. Deeks tried to talk to her and failed as well."

Finding his voice, Callen finally speaks up, "So the solution was to arrest her?" He is still processing the news and while his initial reaction was indeed anger, Callen is trying desperately to separate his personal and professional involvement. He knows his personal feelings already put Nell in danger once and he is questioning his right to be angry at all right now because he is knows Kensi wouldn't just arrest Nell unless it was necessary.

Looking at Sam, he sees the man nod his head and waits for him to say something else. After a couple minutes it is apparent that Sam isn't going to add anything to conversation and Callen is left to his own thoughts. The fact that he has to purposely make himself think like the senior agent-in-charge has Callen confused enough right now and he isn't so sure asking Sam for his take will make him feel any better.

As if sensing Callen's thoughts, Sam speaks up just as they pull into the driveway and prepare to go into the house. "G, you good? I mean I know you are still kicking yourself for the coffee shop thing and now this. You being this quiet is making me nervous, man. I don't want Kensi and Deeks feel the heat from you being mad, especially when it appears you're more angry at yourself than anyone else."

Callen takes a deep breath and gets out of the car. His partner follows his lead. Leaning against the open door frame, Callen attempts to clear the air. "Look, I know I screwed up earlier. I have been way too distracted. This thing with Nell has me so off-kilter I'm not even what I should be doing from minute to minute some days."

Callen takes a moment to look over at the house before continuing to speak. "She made the right call, didn't she Sam? Kensi, I mean. She did what was necessary, right?" Sam looks at his partner and realizes, in that moment, just how much this is affecting his judgment.

Sam nods in his head at the same time he talks. "Yea. Kensi made the right call." Looking at the wave of relief wash over Callen's demeanor, Sam questions his partner about a topic that is never easy to bring up. "Are you gonna be able to do this, G? You sure you don't need to pull yourself off this case?"


	18. Chapter 18

**Author's Note – I do not own the characters from NCIS: LA. **

** Here you go! A full chapter. A bit of interaction with Sam and Eric. Heading back into some of the case and bringing in some loose ends. Hopefully, I still have an audience! **

** As always, please read and review. I am particularly interested in hearing where there may be points of confusion. Ideas or concepts that haven't been explained. I know what I think needs explained, but I'm curious what points you guys think are unclear. **

** Hope everyone enjoys!**

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Callen pauses for a mere second before answering the question. "Absolutely not, Sam. I'm fine. This isn't the first time I've been emotionally invested in a case and I doubt it will be the last." He locks eyes with his partner and continues, "We've all been here at one point or another. It's just a matter of regaining perspective. Trust me, the coffee shop definitely did that for me."

Seeing the fire back in his partner's eyes and demeanor, Sam is instantly put at ease. Callen is right about each of them having fought personal connections to a case. It's something that goes with the territory and always will in one way or another. Knowing things are getting back on track, Sam smiles at his partner. "You ready to do this, G?"

Callen returns the smile and nods his head ever so slightly before moving towards the front door. Steeling himself one last time as he turns the doorknob, Callen enters the room first. Deeks immediately stands and greets the two men, while Kensi falls in close behind.

Seeing Callen arrive, Nell stands and walks towards the door as well addressing the lead agent. "You mind calling her off." Nell gestures in the direction of Kensi as she speaks. "My hands are falling asleep and this isn't exactly a comfortable position."

Callen looks between the two women before settling his gaze on Nell. "I think that's kinda the point, don't you?" He waits a moment before continuing. "Are you ready to stay put and stop trying to leave the safe house?"

She locks eyes with him and is stunned into submission; at least for the time being. Seeing Nell nod her head, Callen retrieves a pocket knife from his pants and cuts the zip ties. Nell rubs her wrists for a minute as she encourages the circulation to return to normal. Starting to feel the anger welling up inside once again; especially in light of Callen condoning Kensi's methods, Nell looks amongst the team and speaks. "Is it acceptable for me to take a shower or do I need an escort for that too?"

Callen speaks up before anyone else has the opportunity feeling a bit annoyed by the attitude she is displaying. "Why? Do you need an escort? Because I can arrange that for you if you would like." Callen realizes Nell is frustrated, but he has to say the feeling is mutual. The fact that she insists on continuing to put herself in harm's way to catch this guy doesn't exactly thrill him. Or any of them for that matter.

Sam sees the sparks about to fly and steps in to diffuse the situation. "C'mon Nell. Let's get you to the back of the house before things get outta control." He places his hand on the small of her back as he leads her out of the room. Looking back at the team, he gives Callen a look that indicates his lack of interest in the pot being stirred.

In response, Callen simply shrugs and turns to face Kensi and Deeks. "OK. Care to explain what exactly happened here tonight that lead to Nell being put in zip ties?" Callen crosses his arms across his chest and waits for a response. In turn, Deeks shifts his stance and looks at Kensi indicating it's her turn to explain. Kensi rolls her eyes at her partner and turns to Callen as she goes through the events of the night.

Reaching the bedroom, Sam quietly shuts the door behind them. Turning to face the young analyst, he mulls over the best approach. Hoping she will decide it's safe to just talk to him, he speaks softly. "Nell, what's going on here? What's all this about?"

Looking up at the man in front of her, she has a hard time staying mad. Sam has an innate ability to squelch any ill-will towards people and she knows he only wants to understand where she is coming from in this moment.

Shaking her head and looking down at her hands, Nell moves across the room before deciding to sit on the edge of the bed. "This lunatic has kidnapped more women because of me." Seeing him start to argue her point, she puts her hand up to silence him. "He is, Sam. This is all patterned off some sick obsession with me."

She stands up and approaches him before speaking again. "How am I supposed to just sit here and wait for this guy to kill more innocent people just to get to me? I need to get out there and do something." She looks into Sam's face to see if he shows any signs that she can convince him to help her. "I'm going to go crazy if I have to just sit here and do nothing."

Seeing Nell's desperation, Sam decides to broach the subject everyone seems to be avoiding. "How is this guy connected to you, Nell? You talk around it, but you won't tell us how you know him." Seeing her tense immediately at the question, he tries again.

Reaching out and holding onto her upper arms in an attempt to keep her grounded, he speaks with a bit more conviction. "He isn't going to hurt you again, Nell. But you know he will hurt those women. You saw the pictures. You read the files. We have to get this guy and we have to do it soon. Whatever is in that head of yours can help us."

Nell feels the panic rising listening to Sam talk as she replays the events of the last several days through her head. The images from the files flash through her mind causing her to shake her head quickly from side to side as she tries to move away from Sam's grip. "Let me go, Sam." Locking eyes with the large man, she fights the tears that are pooling in her eyes. "Please, Sam. I can't do this."

Sam loosens his hold on her arms slightly, but doesn't let go. He knows he has to continue to push her. Sometimes, in situations like these, it's necessary to push past the comfort zone in order to get someone to talk. He just wishes he knew how far was too much. He knows Kensi has tried talking to her and had no luck. Callen has had a little bit of luck, but she isn't opening up fast enough and unfortunately a lot of lives are now at stake. It's time to push the boundaries and hope she doesn't crack.

"Nell, look at me." He waits for compliance before speaking and almost looses his resolve when he sees the fear etched in her face. "You have to tell me. The only way to stop this guy is to know why he is doing this and you are the only one, besides him, that can answer that question."

She knows Sam is right. Hell, they have all been right about needing all the information locked in her head. She knows, logically anyway, she needs to talk in order to get this case solved quickly. She also knows there is no way she can talk about this with Sam. It was hard enough to get the words out that she spoke to Callen. And that was just a couple.

Feeling her defenses work overtime to stop the onslaught of emotions, Nell begins to methodically categorize everything in her head and knows her mind is shutting down. It isn't even a conscious decision; it's her mind's way of protecting the fragile hold she has on herself. Seeing her take a deep breath, Sam mistakes the action as her resolve being lowered and throws out the one set of words that changes everything. "You can trust me."

Nell is instantly transported back in time and reacts in a way Sam never anticipated. She pulls out of his grip with such force that she almost falls to the ground. Re-gaining her balance, Nell's breathing instantly becomes uneven and she struggles to maintain control.

Sam reaches out to help her, but as soon as he gets close she pushes him away and shakes her head so erratically Sam is afraid she is going to fall just from the motion. He immediately stops his body and places his hands up in the air as he calls out for help. "G!"

Hearing the pitch in his partner's voice, Callen immediately comes into the room followed closely by Deeks and Kensi. Seeing it is just Sam and Nell, all three release the grip they had on their weapons and re-holsters them. Seeing Nell in the midst of a panic attack, Callen approaches her slowly holding one hand out towards her as he gets close.

Speaking in a soft tone, Callen attempts to reach her with his voice before actually touching her. "Nell. I'm right here. I've got you." He repeats these words several times before he sees them start to reach into her psyche. As soon as he sees the telltale signs of recognition, Callen reaches for Nell and pulls her into his embrace. "You're gonna be fine. I'm right here. I've got you."

The team watches in amazement as Callen brings Nell out of the panic attack with his soothing words and touch. Feeling as if they are intruding on an otherwise private moment, they all back slowly out of the room and take a seat in the front of the house.

Nell feels herself coming back to reality as she recognizes the comfort and safe harbor of Callen's arms. As her breathing evens and the panic disappears, she loosens her grip on his arms.

Pulling back slightly and looking at Callen, she reaches up as she places her hand on his face. She feels him lean in slightly at her touch and sees him close his eyes as he takes in the moment. She smiles as he takes a deep intake of air as if she is his lifeline and not the other way around. "I'm fine, Callen. I just got spooked."

Callen smiles as he pulls her back into a brief embrace, "I know." He pulls back and locks eyes with her as if trying read her mind. Apparently satisfied with whatever information he garnered, he speaks once again. "You ready for that shower yet?"

Nell lets out a chuckle and steps back even further from the man in front of her. "You trying to get rid of me?" She places her hand on her hip and pretends to be offended.

Deciding to go with the banter, "Is it that obvious? I mean you are pretty high-maintenance lately." Reaching up and smacking the senior agent's arm, Nell gives him a moment to re-word his previous statement. He laughs at her reaction. "I just need to finish up with the team.

Nodding her head as she walks into the bathroom, Nell prepares for what she hopes is a relaxing shower. She re-plays what happened with Sam in her mind as she steps into the hot water. The need to get herself under control has never been more apparent than in this moment. The feeling of slipping into the abyss is not one she is interested in re-visiting.

Callen leaves the bedroom and joins his team in the living room. Sam immediately comes to his side to inquire about Nell. "Look, man. I'm sorry. I don't even get what happened." He is clearly upset over her reaction and the fact that he once again caused her to react in fear. "I was just talking to her about opening up and telling us how she knows this guy. She was ready, G. I could see it. Then..."

Callen holds up one hand to stop his partner's flow of words as he reaches up to touch the man's bicep with the other hand. "It's fine, Sam. She's fine. Or she will be fine." He locks eyes with Sam hoping to get him to believe his words. "I just wanted to finish up out here so you guys could get home and sleep."

Addressing the team as a whole, he speaks in a low tone in case Nell comes out of the shower. "Herrold has got to make some sort of move by tomorrow. He isn't just going to sit and wait." Looking at Deeks, he issues orders. "Check in with LAPD first thing in the morning. They still have lead on this case technically. Find out if they made any headway with Herrold being at the coffee shop."

Deeks nods his head and steps back as Callen continues setting the stage for tomorrow's workday. "Kensi, you and Deeks follow-up anything LAPD finds out. Even if they already checked into whatever the lead is, check it out again. Make sure nothing gets missed."

Looking at his partner, Callen knows he doesn't have to say anything at this point. "I know Eric will let you know if anything happens, but be sure to keep me in the loop. Even if isn't anything major. I will be in first thing in the morning as well." Sam nods his head and squeezes the smaller man's shoulder. As if mentioning the man's name made him suddenly realize how much it seems they are all neglecting Eric, he puts out an inquiry. "Does anyone know how Eric is doing with this whole video feed thing? It's gotta be hell for him."

They all look amongst each other and realize none of them has been focusing on the technical analyst. "I'll talk to him tonight on my way home." Callen nods in Deeks' direction as if to silently say thank you to him.

Callen bids the team goodbye as they all filter out the front door. Turning around and taking a minute to breathe, Callen heads towards the kitchen for a drink before moving towards the back of the house to check on Nell. He notices the shower is no longer on and approaches Nell's bedroom quietly.

Knocking gently and getting no response, Callen calls her name. Unsure where exactly Nell is in the mix and not wanting to walk in if she is changing clothes, Callen calls her name again before he peeks his head around the frame of the door. He sees her lying on her side at the edge of the bed and assumes she is probably sleeping. Approaching the bed slowly, he comes around where he can see her and is happy when he confirms Nell is indeed asleep. Not wanting to risk waking her up, he retrieves a blanket from the other bedroom and places it over her. Silently pulling the chair over to the side of her bed, Callen settles back content to watch over her as she sleeps.

Kensi makes her way to Deeks' place and pulls over to let him out. Leaning out the window to bid him goodbye, she lets him know what time to be ready for pick up in the morning. Giving a wave in response, Deeks makes his way into his apartment. Leaning down and petting Monty, he treks through the living room to let the trusty dog out back for a short time.

Pulling out his phone, Deeks dials Eric's number and waits for an answer. The phone goes to voicemail and he decides to wait awhile before trying again. He reaches down and grabs a toy in order to play with Monty. In the midst of enjoying what little bit of normalcy the last few days have offered, Deeks' cell phone rings.

Retrieving his phone, Deeks sees Eric's name on the screen. "Hey Eric. Just wanted to check in. See how you're doing." He listens as Eric starts to chronicle the changes, or lack thereof, in the case. Letting him talk for a minute, Deeks finally interrupts him. "No man. How are _you _doing? I don't want updates from the case tonight. At least not unless they need immediate follow-up." He pauses for moment, but then speaks again when Eric says nothing. "I know this case has been hell for you too, but it just hit us we haven't stopped long enough to make sure you're doing alright."

Deeks listens as the young man assures him all is well is tech land. Not completely believing the words offered by their resident geek, Deeks asks Eric to join him on an early morning surf the next day. Politely declining, Eric tells Deeks he needs to get off the phone so he can jump in the shower before heading to bed. Bidding him goodbye, Deeks makes a conscious decision to focus more on Eric in the days to come. After firing off a quick text to Callen letting him know he touched base with Eric, Deeks brings Monty inside and heads to bed.

Eric places his phone on the desk in the ops center and settles back in front of the computer. There is no way he is leaving tonight or any other night soon as far as he is concerned. Not only do the lives of four women rest squarely on his ability to solve this mystery, his best friend is still a target. He has no intention of resting any more than absolutely necessary to survive.

Pulling up the case files, he starts the process of sifting through the information once again. He knows the odds of finding anything pertinent are next to nothing only because he has repeated this process so many times. If there was anything to find, then he would have found it by now.

Glancing at his watch and seeing the early hour, he knows he has avoided the next step in the sequence as long as he can. It's time for his least favorite part of this repetitive process. Eric pulls up the video feed. Earlier in the evening, he assigned a second set of eyes to watch the footage as well because they don't know when Herrold might appear again and he can't have his eyes on it all the time. So far, nothing has changed. The women are shown in the what appears to be separate rooms and the camera loops between each room every seven minutes.

Eric has been over every inch of the rooms to try to find some sort of clue. There has been nothing to identify the location. He can't even get a hit on the audio. It's like they are in a sound proof room because nothing from the outside is coming through, but he can hear every sound the women make. Slamming his hands on the desk, he pushes off the desk and lifts his body out of the chair as he paces in a circle throughout the ops center.

He walks over to the island in the center of the ops room and places his hands along the edge as he leans his tall frame over the information splayed across the electronic screen. Looking at nothing in particular, Eric fights to get his frustration under control. He silently wonders how he ever managed to solve cases like these before Nell came in the picture. It seems almost impossible without the second set of eyes he has grown accustomed to having around.

His thought process is interrupted by the ping of an incoming email coming from his computer. Rushing over to the device, he checks his watch. It's nearly four in the morning. Wondering who would be sending an email at this odd hour, he silently hopes it's something that will at least help their case.

He sees the email is from Detective Michaels and opens it quickly. There are multiple files from the LAPD and Eric realizes it's the information gathered from the coffee shop earlier. Silently thankful for new information to look over, Eric gets to work reading the statements of the staff. He makes a mental note of his feeling that something is not quite right with the current file he is reading before moving to the next file.

After an hour or so of reading statements and case notes, he comes across a video file. Blaming the lack of sleep for his misstep, Eric immediately pulls up the footage from the shop. Using his equipment, Eric is able to glean some information that he deems important.

Moving back to the statements, he realizes what had caught his eye. Looking back at the footage for confirmation, he gives one of the few smiles that has graced his face during the course of this investigation.

Moving to his computer he searches for personal information on the waitress who was seen approaching Herrold multiple times while he was in the coffee shop. He hits a couple of dead-ends, but keeps pushing. Something is off. He can feel it. Shifting his methods to moves to the mother of all information and decides to look through the various social networks. He finds and hacks into her Facebook account first. It always amazes him how much people put on these sites.

Looking through her photos, he finds exactly what he is looking for. The waitress is pictured, multiple times, with Herrold. The locations vary and the date/time stamps show they have known each other for at least two months. He looks at his watch before retrieving his cell phone.

Dialing the number, he waits for an answer. Hearing a sleepy voice answer, Eric attempts to contain his excitement over the break in the case. "Hey, Sam! I got something. I need you in here immediately."

Sam instructs Eric to call Kensi and Deeks before letting him know he will go pick up Callen. Climbing out of bed and kissing his wife goodbye, Sam moves quickly throughout his house before getting in his car and pulling out of the driveway. Figuring Callen will likely be in the same room as Nell, Sam opts to send a text to decrease the chances of waking Nell. Sam doubts Callen has left her alone since they left the night before.

Pulling up to the house, Sam is a little surprised to be greeted by a waiting Callen. He gets in the car and Sam moves down the street quickly as he heads to the Mission. The men sit in silence for the duration of the ride each one knowing whatever Eric found has to be a game changer; otherwise he would have waited the couple hours it would have taken for them to arrive in the office for the day.

Maintaining the silence, they walk directly to the ops center. Seeing Kensi and Deeks already waiting, Callen takes the lead. "What's up, Eric?" Just as his words are spoken, Hetty comes through the automatic doors to join the briefing.

Eric takes his position in front of the big screen as he pulls up several items. Turning to face the team, he begins the explanation. "So I got an email about four this morning from Detective Michaels. It has all the statements and case notes from the coffee shop fiasco. As I was going through all the information something seemed off with one particular waitress so I looked a little closer."

Pulling up her driver's license and personal information, Eric continues. "Meet Mindy Jackson. I couldn't quite figure it out, so I looked at the files Michaels sent again. That's when noticed the video file. I missed it the first time I did a quick inspection of the stuff he sent."

Eric pulls up the video footage from the coffee shop. "This is the footage sent from the cameras inside the coffee shop. Fast-forwarding to the time that Callen and Nell were there, you can see Herrold at this table." He looks at the team as he explains his findings. "Herrold was there for twenty-seven minutes before you guys even got there. If you watch Herrold, then you can see the same waitress talking to him during the time he is there."

He turns back to the screen and pulls up a statement. "The thing is, Mindy Jackson claims she doesn't know who William Herrold is. She sticks to that theory even when other officers interview her."

Callen speaks up first. "No offense, but I don't get where you are going with this. She's a waitress in a busy coffee shop. It really is possible she doesn't know him. Maybe he just happened to be in there that day."

Eric smiles at Callen's interruption and waits for a reaction as he pulls up several photos from her Facebook page. "Except here they are together. Several times over the last couple months." The reactions of the team don't disappoint as they all stand up to full height. Eric can almost see the wheels turning as they process the information. "He is apparently using an alias with her though because she identifies him as Micah in the pictures."

Hetty springs into action as soon as Eric finishes talking. "Eric, call LAPD and let them know we are moving in. Tell them to meet Mr. Callen and the others at Ms. Jackson's apartment with a tactical unit in twenty minutes. Inform them Herrold may well be there and they should be prepared for that possibility. Secure a warrant as well."

Looking at his team, Callen adds one last point before they leave the ops center. "Everyone suit up. We are going in with the assumption Herrold is there armed and ready for a fight." Seeing that his team understands the severity of the situation, Callen leads the way to the tactical room.


	19. Chapter 19

** Author's Notes – I hereby admit I do not own any of the characters from NCIS: LA. I will claim Mindy Jackson, Micah Sanders, and Rachel Meadows.**

**This chapter isn't as long as the others, but it seemed to be natural break in the storyline. Hopefully no one minds the lack of Nell/Callen interaction. The case is heating up a bit and was in desperate need of being brought back to the front burner. Don't worry though, I have no intention of leaving them in the cold for too long. **

** As always...thanks to all who have favorited this story, as well as those who have the story on alert. I am thankful for all the reviews and look forward to reading your thoughts about this chapter as well.**

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They pull up in front of Mindy Jackson's apartment and meet up with the tactical team from the LAPD. Knowing he is too personally invested in this case, as well as not completely trusting what his reaction will be when he comes face to face with the man who attacked Nell, Callen hands the lead over to Sam. The tactical team meets with Sam for a brief moment as he confirms everyone is on the same page. No one can afford to make a mistake at this point. They need Herrold alive in order to find out where the kidnapped women are being held.

Moving quickly into the building, the two teams glide fluidly through the hallways until they are standing directly in front of the apartment in question. Knowing they will need the element of surprise, Sam motions for Kensi to come forward. She picks the lock effortlessly and moves slightly to the side allowing Sam to once again take the lead.

Moving cohesively, the two teams of four act as one unit in the apprehension effort. They all know what is at stake and everyone is anxious to get the suspect in custody. Under a shroud of silence, the entire house is cleared with the exception of one room. Sam takes point as they move to the final room; the bedroom. They saved this room for last because of the early hour. Odds are Herrold and Jackson are still sleeping.

In one swift move, the door is flung open and the room explodes with action. Quickly noting the location of Herrold, Sam and his team move to that side of the bed. While under the watchful cover of Callen, Deeks, and Kensi, Sam pulls a shell-shocked Herrold from the bed. The LAPD team apprehend Mindy Jackson. The whole operation takes less than five minutes from start to finish and culminates with Herrold and Jackson in handcuffs.

After getting the clearance from LAPD to use their facilities to question the suspects, the team brings the suspects to the boatshed for interrogation. Kensi, Deeks, Callen, and Sam meet in the front area in order to come up with a strategy. After discussing what they already know, Callen decides Kensi and Deeks will question Herrold. Up to this point, Sam is the only member of the team that Herrold has not seen and the they want to keep his identity under-wraps in case they need him later.

While watching from the front, Kensi and Deeks get comfortable as they listen to the interrogation with Mindy Jackson before they move to question Herrold. Sam and Callen move into the room where a very frightened Mindy Jackson is sitting behind the large wooden table. Upon seeing the two men, she immediately starts talking a mile a minute. The two men just watch for a moment until she exhausts herself into silence. Or maybe she finally determines they aren't going to speak until she stops talking.

Sam starts the conversation. "Mindy Jackson, correct?" The woman nods her head. "And your boyfriend's name is William Herrold, correct?" The woman gives both men a look of confusion before speaking.

"No. His name is Micah Sanders. What is this about? And who is William Herrold? I don't understand what is happening. Why are we here?" She is moving away from the frightened realm and into the confused realm. Knowing it won't be long before she moves firmly into the pissed off realm, Sam speaks again.

"Ma'am, it appears your boyfriend isn't who you think he is." Sam pulls out the screenshots of William Herrold they isolated from the pub's cameras. As he lays the pictures on the table, Callen watches her eyes cloud over in confusion. "These were taken inside a pub where a federal agent was drugged. He then attempted to kidnap her from the pub, but she ran."

Mindy Jackson shakes her head back and forth as she listens to Sam continue. "The next morning, he went the agent's house and attempted to kidnap her again. She pulled her weapon and he took off."

Jackson is still shaking her head back and forth as Sam's words stop flowing. "No way. You've got the wrong man. There is no way Micah would attack anyone." Sam lifts up the best picture they have of the William Herrold and hands it to her.

"Look at the picture. It's him. See for yourself." She takes the picture from Sam's hand, but her face shows no sign of believing what she is being told or what she is seeing. Jackson looks at Sam once again and then over to Callen.

"I'm telling you guys. There's gotta be some sort of mistake. When did this attack happen?" Sam supplies the timeline causing Mindy Jackson to speak up with much more confidence in her voice. "We weren't even in town that night. Micah and I went to celebrate my sister's birthday in Vegas. We flew out that morning and didn't come back til the next night. Micah wasn't even in the state when these pictures we taken."

Sam and Callen exchange a look and excuse themselves before moving towards the door. Slipping into the main area of the boatshed, they see Eric's image already on the screen. Knowing the technical analyst doesn't need explanation on how to proceed, they shift their gazes to Kensi and Deeks as Eric does his thing.

Callen speaks first, "What do you guys think?" He obviously knows what his gut is telling him and it's nothing good. Nothing about his girl indicates she is lying and, if that's the case, it makes no sense based on what they know. He is hoping his team may have picked up on something he did not.

"I don't man. I think she is telling the truth. Unless she is a damn good actress..." Deeks words are cut off by that of his partner's sentiments.

"I agree with Deeks. She isn't giving off any vibes. At all." She exchanges a slightly concerned look with Sam before settling her gaze on Callen. Before she has a chance to speak again, Eric interrupts their discussion.

"Uh, guys. That's because she is telling the truth." The team turns to see his image on the screen as well as another image of the boarding passes. "Mindy Jackson and Micah Sanders left on a flight from LAX to Vegas at 9:25 am. They arrived back in LA the next evening at 10:45."

"What the hell is going on, Eric? We have to missing something. That guy we have in there has to be Herrold; he's a dead ringer." Sam's frustration is starting to get the better of him. When they got called in this morning with this break, he expected the case to be on its way to closure. This twist leaves them with more questions than answers. Again. And he was getting tired of the case stalling every time it seems they are getting ahead.

Eric, equally as frustrated at the latest turn, answers with more force than usual. "I have no idea, Sam. You guys have just as much information as I do. It's like you think I have some magic powers that can make everything instantly make sense." Knowing it will be better if he doesn't continue, Eric disconnects the feed and walks out of ops to get some air.

Kensi takes the lead in the conversation hoping to make some sort of sense out of the mess. "Ok. Let's talk this out guys. There has to be an explanation that makes sense." The four agents spend the next five minutes exchanging possibilities. Just as the younger agents are gearing up to enter the interrogation room to talk with whoever the hell they have in their custody, Eric's image pops up on the screen once again.

"We've got a problem." The four turn to face Eric as he brings up the live feed of the captured women. "He's in the room with one of the women he is holding."

They all stand in horror as the man on the screen alternates between taunting the woman and beating her. "Eric, are we sure that's Herrold. Has he faced the camera? Maybe he's got a partner." Sam's voice breaks the silence that has befallen the room as they have no choice but to watch this madman. As if he can hear what was said, the man turns and stands directly in front of the camera before speaking.

"I warned you I wouldn't wait very long. You apparently thought I was kidding. Maybe, you thought I didn't have the balls. I don't know and I don't care." Walking back over the now unconscious woman, he grabs her roughly by the hair bringing her face clearly in view. "You have twelve hours to complete the exchange. After that, young Sarah's body will be the first you find."

Kensi pipes up giving Eric instructions that are probably not even needed, "Look into missing persons reports for any young females with the name Sarah. This guy is so pissed off, he may have given us a piece of information that could let us narrow down the locations he has them hidden."

Callen nods to Eric and disconnects the video feed knowing the young man will do everything in his power to find the next lead. He turns to Deeks and Kensi and gives them the go-ahead to talk to their mystery man.

Walking into the small room that holds the man they once thought was William Herrold, Kensi takes the lead as she sits in the chair directly across from a very confused individual. Deeks stands just to the side of his partner and crosses his arms across his chest as he listens to her begin speaking.

"My name is Special Agent Kensi Blye and this is Detective Marty Deeks." She pauses for a moment debating where to start. The whole situation has taken such a crazy turn that they all are scrambling to regroup. She pulls out the photos from the pub and sets them in front of the man as she watches his reaction.

The man leans forward and gasps as he sees the images. "That man looks just like me. Oh my God! Who is that? What is he doing to that woman?" He sifts through the photos several times before he stills his actions and makes eye contact with Kensi. "Wait a minute. You think this is me!?"

Kensi leans forward and takes one of the photos from the table as she speaks. Even though they saw this man's doppelganger on the video feed just before they stepped into the interrogation room, the pair decide to proceed as if the man in front of them is William Herrold.

She tips her head slightly to the side as if looking at the image, then makes eye contact with the man once again. "Sure appears to be you." She turns to look at Deeks as she points to the photo. "Don't you think that looks like him?" Deeks nods his head agreeing with his partner.

Kensi looks back at the man sitting across from her and begins to speak. "William Herrold. Attacked a federal agent in a pub, drugged her, and then tried to kidnap her. When that failed, Herrold went to her home and tried to once again kidnap her. He was once again unsuccessful, but only because the agent pulled her weapon on him."

She watches as the man shakes his head violently from side to side. "NO! My name is Micah Sanders. I don't have any idea who William Herrold is and I have never been in that pub. Hell, I have never been to any pub. I don't even drink."

Deeks leans forward with his arms on the table. "Well, then that clears everything up." He looks over at his partner, "Don't you think? He says that's not him, so that's that." Kensi leans back in her chair and watches the man as Deeks continues.

"You do realize that pretty much everyone who sits in that chair says it's not them. Right? Look at the pictures man! That is clearly you in the images. No doubt about it." He looks over at Kensi for a brief moment before straitening up to his full height and turning back to the man. "Unless you've got a twin out there that you aren't telling us about."

Just as the words leave his mouth, the door to the interrogation room opens causing the partners to look at the person responsible for the disruption. Seeing Sam standing in the doorway, they know exactly what the look he gives them means. They move to the door and walk into the main area leaving the man in the interrogation room to ponder his own thoughts.

Callen points to the screen and they look up to see Eric's face. "Score for the detective. You appear to have gotten it right." Deeks shoots a confused look at Kensi and then looks back to Eric as he begins to speak again. "And apparently without even knowing it." Eric pulls up several documents on the screen as his image shifts to a small box in the corner.

"Guys meet Rachel Meadows. She gave birth to twin boys on February 2, 1989 in Los Angeles, California. She was a fifteen high school freshman from a highly religious family. The boys were given up for adoption two days later. It appears the agency separated the boys under the request of the family." Eric's image comes back full screen as he removes the various documents from the screen. "So, in answer to your confusion Deeks. Yes, Micah Sanders has a twin brother and it is quite possible he doesn't even realize it."

Deeks and Kensi, obviously still trying to process the information, look over at Sam and Callen for the next set of directions. Callen thinks for just a brief second before speaking, "Looks like Mr. Sanders is about to find out he has a twin brother. Get as much information as you can about him and his adoptive family. With any luck he knows he is adopted and can help us out on that end." Looking at the screen, Callen addresses Eric. "Does Rachel Meadows still live in the area?"

Eric taps a few strokes on his keyboard and then nods without looking up at Callen. "Yep. Sending the information to your phones now."

Sam instructs Eric to continue digging and then looks at his partner. "Looks like a road trip, G." His partner nods his head before moving to put his jacket on in preparation for their departure. "And to a nice neighborhood too." Looking over at the younger pair, Sam continues talking as the pair walk towards the exit. "Keep us in the loop. We will let you know if we find anything that may help."


	20. Chapter 20

**Author's Note – **OK...so, I wanted to put a little blip out there to let you know I have not disappeared. I will be updating by April 11th or 12th. I don't generally bring my personal life into my writing; however, my children are currently on Spring Break (since the 29th) which makes writing a bit more difficult. I have six kids ranging from 11-17 and things get a little hectic around here. I am enjoying some time to hang out and play video games with them as well as attempt to spend time with my girlfriend (in between her crazy work schedule).

I look forward to returning to writing as soon as they get back into school. For now, it's been a nice break to just hang out and not feel I need to worry about posting a chapter a week...or two. Thanks for all your follows, favorites, and alerts! It really does make one feel good to receive the encouragement. If any of you have a suggestion for the scavenger hunt for Drug of Choice, feel free to let me know. I am still working on the next set of clues and can always use ideas. If nothing else, my girlfriend will appreciate me not asking her every other day!

Thanks!


	21. Chapter 21

** Author's Notes – None of the characters from NCIS: LA are mine. I can claim Micah Sanders and Rachel Fitzpatrick as mine, but that's it.**

** Thanks to all who are sticking with me through this journey. The story seems to have taken a life of its own and I am enjoying where the twists lead me. I hope you all are as well.**

** This chapter is revolves around the case completely. Nell is tucked safely away at the safe house and appears to be causing no trouble at all. At least, I think she is behaving!**

** Please read and review. Feel free to offer suggestions or ideas. Thanks to all who have been reviewing and who have been following this story. I hope it is still meeting your expectations. Thanks as well to those who have put this story on your favorites list.**

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Kensi and Deeks exchange matching looks of confusion as they give themselves a minute to process the new information. It is pretty obvious Micah Sanders has no idea he has a twin, let alone an identical twin. If he knew, then he most definitely would have said something upon seeing the pictures of his doppelganger laid in front of him. Taking a breath and moving towards the interrogation room, Kensi gives Deeks one last look that lets him know she will take the lead.

They enter the room in silence and sit down in front of the person they once suspected of being the man responsible for the attacks on the women. Briefly considering how to approach the subject, Kensi decides time is of the essence and cuts right to the chase. "Do you realize you are adopted, Mr. Sanders?"

The color draining from Micah's face gives Kensi and Deeks the answer to their question. They watch as the man sits back in his chair as if he is trying to decipher another language. Kensi continues, "You have an identical twin brother. You and your brother were given up for adoption immediately after your birth."

Micah stands up and begins to pace the room as he tries to comprehend what is being said. He stops and faces the pair before speaking. "This is insane. You guys are telling me I am adopted. My parents never once told me I was adopted. Why wouldn't they say something? And this guy..." He reaches over to the table and holds up a picture of Herrold. "this guy is my identical twin. Not only is he my twin, he is apparently a pretty sick guy. He attacked a federal agent in a pub and then at her home. What the hell! I need to get out of here. I need to talk to Mindy and my parents."

Deeks moves over to Micah's side of the room and gently guides him back to the chair. "Look man, we are getting this information at the same time as you are. I can't tell you why your parents kept the fact that you are adopted from you, but I'm sure they had their reasons. As far as your twin goes. Yes, he's pretty twisted. In more ways than you know."

Kensi takes the lead once again. "Micah, we need your help. Are your parents still alive?" Micah nods his head in affirmation without making eye contact. "We're going to need to talk to them. Do they live around here?" Again, a nod without eye contact. "Micah, I need you to look at me." She waits for the man to lock eyes with her before speaking again. "We need their address." She pushes a piece of paper his direction and waits for him to write out where they live.

Deeks places a hand on Micah's shoulder and squeezes it gently before letting him know both he and Mindy are free to leave. He gives them the party line about staying in town and making sure they are available if any other questions would arise. He instructs the officer waiting outside to take them back to their apartment.

Looking over at his partner, Deeks takes a deep breath. "This is not how I thought my morning was going to go. Get the bad guy. Tie up the loose ends into a pretty, little bow. Get off early for a job well done. Catch some waves and maybe a beer or two later; that's how today was supposed to go. This is nothing like that."

Kensi nods her head in understanding and leads the way to the car. Getting in the car, Kensi pulls out her cell phone and gives Callen a quick call to update him about the latest change. Looking over at Deeks, she waits for him to fasten his seat belt before driving towards the highway. The day is about to get much more interesting because, in her experience, when someone hides a truth this big about the past it is typically not a pleasant trip down memory lane.

Callen relays the information, or more like lack of information Kensi gave him, to Sam as they are pulling into the driveway of the house listed as Rachel Meadows. Sam lets out a low whistle as he takes in the enormous home. "Pretty swanky. Dontcha' think, G? Looks like she did well for herself over the years."

Nodding his head as they approach the door, Callen rings the doorbell and waits with Sam for a response. When the door opens, they are greeted by an older man in a tuxedo. The partners give each other a quick glance before asking for Rachel Meadows. Their request is met with a slightly confused expression before the man speaks up. "This is the home of Edwin and Rachel Fitzpatrick, so I presume you mean Rachel Fitzpatrick." The two men nod their heads and make a mental note to inquire with Eric how exactly this not so little piece of information was left out.

The man leads Callen and Sam into a large foyer area and instructs they wait there while he gets Mrs. Fitzpatrick. The partners look around the room at the various pictures and paintings hoping to get some sort of idea about the homeowners. Callen's phone indicates an incoming text and he laughs to himself as he sees the updated information about Rachel's life flash across the screen; including her married name. Just as Sam is drifting closer to what appears to be a study, Mrs. Fitzpatrick appears sans the older man who went to let her know she is needed.

"Gentlemen." She nods to each man and then remains silent waiting for an indication of who they are.

"Ma'am." Sam returns the nod before continuing. "My name is Special Agent Sam Hanna." Pointing in Callen's direction, he speaks again. "This is my partner, Special Agent Callen." Both men show their badges to the clearly confused woman before Sam takes the lead once again. "Is there somewhere more private we can talk, Mrs. Fitzpatrick?"

Looking a bit skeptical, she shakes her head and questions the necessity. "I'm afraid you are going to have to give me a little more information to work with here. What is this regarding?" Callen gives his partner a quick glance before returning his gaze to the woman in front of them. She is clearly suited for the socialite track as there doesn't appear to be a hair out of place on her head and the clothes she is wearing are just as perfectly displayed. She is wearing several pieces of jewelry that Callen is fairly certain a lot of women would envy, but few would be able to afford.

"We need to ask you about the twins you gave up for adoption thirty years ago." Mrs. Fitzpatrick's demeanor quickly changes to one of a scared woman with a secret that, from all appearances, she has not shared with anyone. She calls for the older man to return and orders him to not disturb her for the rest of morning. Looking at Callen and Sam, she motions for them to follow her into the study just off the foyer.

Taking a seat behind the large mahogany desk, she offers the men the chairs directly in front of her. Callen sits, while Sam remains standing which will give him access to perusing the many pictures lining the large bookcases around the room.

Callen gets straight to the point, hoping to get as much information in the least amount of time as possible. "Your maiden name is Meadows, correct?" She nods. "When you were fifteen you gave birth to twin boys who were given up for adoption, correct?" Once again, she nods. "I need you to tell me about everything surrounding the adoption of your sons."

She sits for a moment contemplating the words Callen spoke. Sam, having seen everything he needed to from around the room, takes the seat beside his partner. It appeared the study belonged to her husband as the majority of the pictures were business related. The silence is broken by a now quiet, frail voice that sounds nothing like the woman who greeted them in the foyer.

"My sons." She shakes her head slowly. "No one has ever referred to them as my sons before. There is no way my parents would have allowed me to keep them, not a chance in hell." Callen leans back in his chair slightly letting the woman lose herself in the past.

"My parents are highly religious. My father was, rather still is I suppose, the Deacon in the Catholic Church close to where I grew up. He found his calling when I was about ten years old. After working in business for years, he had an epiphany of sorts. I'm not even sure why, but next thing I know we are moving to a new house right beside the church and we were completely immersed in this newfound obsession of his; religion. He quit his job and made the church his new job."

Sam listens intently attempting to file all the non-verbal cues away for later inquiry. Mrs. Fitzpatrick clearly does not appear to share her parents viewpoints and it appears she does not have much contact with them now; at least not her father. Not wanting to interrupt the flow of memories, he remains quiet as she continues.

"My mother had always been deeply religious, but my father never really paid attention to her insistence we needed to find a steady religious base. I sometimes wondered if she had anything to do with this sudden change of heart in my father, but never got a clear answer when I asked. All I know, is they appeared to steadily go off the deep end."

She gets up to pour a glass of water from the pitcher along the right side of the room and returns to her seat after offering a beverage to the partners. Politely declining, Sam encourages her to continue. "My father started volunteering at the church and eventually moved his way up to Deacon. I was about thirteen when that happened. As he became more and more immersed in the church, things at home got more strict as well. He expected complete obedience with no room to discuss. I was no longer allowed to go to friend's houses unless they were members of the church that he knew well. If I dared to step out of line, I was punished severely for the embarrassment I caused."

Apparently needing a change of scenery, Mrs. Fitzpatrick moves to the large window overlooking the street. "By the time I reached fourteen, I had been sneaking out regularly. The punishments became second nature." She locks eyes with Callen before speaking again. "I was completely miserable all the time and I figured I may as well have a good reason to get a beating. My mother was no better and tried to force me to comply through promises of a better life if I just let God take charge."

Taking a moment to compose herself, Mrs. Fitzpatrick once again offers Callen and Sam a beverage. For the sake of getting her to continue, they oblige her request taking the glasses of water offered. "I spent most of my nights running the streets and most weekends at my friend's house partying. One night, we sneaked out of her house and went to a college party. Plenty of booze for all. It was a like the perfect playground. After that first party, we were regular participants. Who could resist a couple of Catholic girls willing to put out?"

Sitting back in the seat across from them, she continued with a little less vibrancy. "Looking back, I can't say I am proud of who I was. I was just reaching for anyone that might give a damn what happened to me. And I figured my parents deserved what rebellion they caught for the way they treated me. Then, I got pregnant. God, I thought my father was going to beat me to death. After the first several hits, I finally screamed at him to stop because he would kill the baby." She let out a callous laugh at the memory. "You know, that got him to stop. Not the thought that he would hurt me. The thought that he would hurt the baby growing in my stomach."

"I honestly don't know when they stopped caring about me and I quit trying to figure it out after that. It just didn't seem worth it. I was shipped off to a home for pregnant teens, though my parents told everyone I went on a mission. Their perfect little girl serving God." She stops to steady her now shaky voice before continuing.

"I didn't even know I was having twins til the second one was born. The home didn't really do a lot with prenatal care, just a place to give birth so the agency would have a healthy, white newborn to place with a worthy family. They never asked me what I wanted. After the babies were born, my mother said I was not allowed to see them and that the arrangements were already made. The agencies would place them separately, she said. It didn't matter what I wanted."

Sam took the opportunity to give her a break from her recollections to ask a question. "Do you know the name of the agency?" She nodded her head and excused herself for moment. Watching as she walked out the room, Callen took the opportunity to walk around the room. Sam spoke up before he could get very far. "What do you suppose the odds are she knows who the babies went to? She certainly has the means to find them if she wanted to push for it; sealed or not for the right price you know there are investigators out there that could dig up the information."

Callen thought for a moment, but his words were interrupted by the footsteps of Mrs. Fitzpatrick. Returning to his seat beside Sam, they waited for her to enter the room. She takes her place behind the desk once again holding a large manila envelope. "You have to understand something. No one knows about the boys. Not even my husband. The only people who knew I was pregnant were my parents and the home I stayed in until I gave birth. I'm not sure how you guys managed to connect me to any of this, but you must have some really resourceful avenues."

Taking the lead, Sam explains where they got the information. "It appears one of adoptive families kept in regular contact with the agency and gave them all their, rather your, son's information in regards to his new name and how to get in contact with them if you ever wanted to meet him. His family also put his information on a database for families looking to reconnect with biological parents." He stopped and smiled briefly at the woman. "And we have a really resourceful person."

Returning his smile, Mrs. Fitzpatrick opens the manila envelope had slowly hands the contents to the agents. Callen looks at Sam, then back at the woman in front of them. Contained in the package was an old photograph of a couple with a newborn. It appears the couple was unaware the picture was being taken. Along with the original photograph was information about Micah Sanders from the time he was a small boy to within the past year, including more photographs. There was also a slip of paper containing the name of the home she was sent to as well as the name of the agency who placed her sons.

"I know it looks a bit off at first glance; all these pictures of him throughout the years." Sam and Callen's thoughts are interrupted by the voice of Mrs. Fitzpatrick. "I took that photo the day he was taken home by his new family. No one ever knew about its existence. I kept it well hidden over the years. I remember hearing them call him Micah as they were rocking him. As soon as I had the means, I hired a private investigator to find the boys; make sure they were safe and happy. It's amazing how much you can make on jobs your parents don't even know exist."

These were the times Sam hated prying into people's personal lives. It seems like so much of an intrusion asking this woman to relive an obviously painful chapter in her life, but he also knows it is imperative they have as much information as they get their hands on in order to close this case. Callen looks over at his partner and instinctively knows what is on his mind. Saving him from having to speak at the moment, Callen asks the question he knows Sam is thinking.

"Mrs. Fitzpatrick, do you have any information on your other son? Were you able to track him at all through the years like you did with Micah?" Callen certainly hopes the investigator was able to follow Micah's twin through the years as well, but he also knows nothing else about this case has been easy so he isn't holding too much hope.

Looking at Callen with sad eyes, she slowly shakes her head. Reaching into the envelope once again, she pulls out a single slip of paper and photograph. "The investigator didn't have anything to go on with him. He was gone within hours after he was born and I never even saw him. At least with Micah's family, I had a picture of him with his new parents. With his brother, there was nothing." Callen looks at the picture and paper before handing it to Sam.

Mrs. Fitzpatrick, anticipating the question before it is spoken, speaks quietly. "The investigator managed to get a young secretary from the adoption agency to give him the address listed on that paper. She told him that was the address his new family gave during the paperwork faze of the process. He went to the home, but no one appeared to be living there anymore. It was like they just picked up one day and vanished without a trace leaving everything as if they were simply on vacation."

Sam takes a breath and asks about the photograph showing a young toddler of about two years old. Mrs. Fitzpatrick answers almost too quietly to be heard. "When he found the house abandoned, the investigator questioned the neighbors in hopes of getting an idea of where they moved. That picture was taken by an elderly couple who lived next door about a year before the investigator showed up. They said they didn't even realize a child lived next door and that the family was rarely seen outdoors. The man said it just seemed odd for a child to suddenly appear and he snapped the picture because he was afraid they may have kidnapped the boy."

Stopping to take a drink before continuing, Mrs. Fitzpatrick's voice conveys the concern she has carried over the years for her missing son. "The man told the investigator the little boy was outside for about ten minutes and when the woman living there came outside to get him, she seemed very angry. She yelled at the boy before grabbing him by the arm and pulling him into the house. They were gone the next day. The couple called the police because everything just seemed too strange. He wasn't sure if the police ever found anything."

Callen speaks up once again. "Did the investigator ever learn the names of the people who adopted him?" Mrs. Fitzpatrick shakes her head indicating the name was still a mystery to her. "Was he able to track the family at all after they left? Find any clue as to where they would have gone?"

Mrs. Fitzpatrick shook her head once again. "I'm really sorry I can't give you anymore information about him." The impromptu trip down memory lane had her mind so out of sorts that it just now dawned on her to inquire as to why they were asking all these questions about the boys. "What exactly is this all about? Why are you asking questions about my sons?"

Callen looks over in Sam's direction indicating he can take the lead on the questions. "We are investigating a man who is responsible for some pretty serious crimes. Through the course of the investigation, we located the suspect and secured him. At least we thought we had secured him. The man we brought in for questioning was Micah, but he provided us with proof he was not responsible. The only other possibility is your other son is the man we are looking for."

Sam watches the woman lean back into the large chair and sees her trying to gauge her reaction. "We are really sorry, ma'am, but it is imperative that we locate him before anything else happens. There are several lives at stake as we speak. If you have any other information that may be able to help us locate him or his adoptive family, we really need to see it now."

Mrs. Fitzpatrick looks at both men before speaking. "I wish I could give you something else on, but it seems he disappeared into thin air. I have often wondered throughout the years what ever became of him and I always had a bad feeling about where he ended up. The only interaction of him with what appeared to be his adoptive mother was borderline abusive and it has stuck with me that he may well have endured a life of hell."

Knowing they have garnered all the information they can from Mrs. Fitzpatrick, the two men stand to excuse themselves. Callen offers his hand as he speaks, "Thank you for talking with us. We will return the photos and information as soon as we are able."

Taking his hand, Mrs. Fitzpatrick smiles weakly before nodding. The men turn to let themselves out the front door, but stop as they hear a soft voice speak out. "Do you think Micah would be willing to meet with me?'

The two men turn around to face her before Sam speaks out. "We can let him know you are interested in meeting him." Sam looks back at Callen before continuing, "Thank you for taking time to meet with us. I am sure it was difficult to dredge up the past; especially under these circumstances." Seeing her nod, Callen and Sam turn to walk out the door.

Once they reach their car, the two men fasten their seatbelts as they remain silent for the duration of the trip back to OSP. The twists keep coming and the only thing they can do is hope Eric can dig up something about the family who used to live in the house Mrs. Fitzpatrick told them about. Maybe, just maybe, the family left a clue behind at the property that could lead them in the right direction and with a little luck they can still find the clue after thirty years.


End file.
